I bought a white coat in the sales to look like Olivia Pope, but I actually resemble a middle aged taekwando instructor

[DollyMixtureLulus]

I’m sorry to hear it, I purchased a long black puffa and sort of looked like something out of the matrix. Title of post really made me laugh out loud!! Thanks OP

pp being called Bob Ross by her dad after a bad perm. Cracking up here.

@NovemberR

Brilliant title! Some brilliant comments.

I do think magazines/internet sites should be banned from showing pictures of celebs in lovely clothes unless they also display a photo of a 53 year old, size 18, 5ft 2in, woman with no make up and jowls like a basset hound wearing the same garment.

It needs the subtitle this is what it will look like on you, Janet next to it.

😂 brilliant!

Just don’t use the tie/belt at the front tie that very loosely at the back and wear with heels as high as you can personally manage and use a grab bag of some sort so you don’t mark the coat and you’ll fabulous!!! I have about 3 white coats I love them but the belt and flat show combo does make you look like an asylum escapee so those are my top tips 😄

@Miljea
Just been searching for a photo of my scrotum trainers, I found one but it doesn't really show them at their 'best'

@RedRec I will certainly check for Pat Butcherness, though I do a public facing job and I'm slightly thinking a touch of Pat might be a good thing.....

@Purplethrow

I also bought a white trilby for a holiday, I looked like a bloody fishmonger.

That’s hilarious! Made me laugh out loud.

One of my favourites was an oversized white shirt, chocolate brown trousers, a brown wool throw/shawl and Ugg boots. My DH asked me if I enjoyed dressing up as Obi wan Kenobi. I had the last laugh as I bought a ginger beard, borrowed a lightsaber and won 3rd place at a fancy dress party that Christmas!!

@Purplethrow

I also bought a white trilby for a holiday, I looked like a bloody fishmonger.

I literally laughed out loud at this!!

In the 60s I had an angora jumper, dancing cheek to cheek at a disco, when the music stopped my jumper had shed all over my partner, glowing under the UV lights

My husband has had to leave the room as I'm laughing so hard and I can't read the words!

Every summer I buy at least one tiered floaty floral dress. In my head I imagine I will look fresh, summery and effortlessly elegant, you know hashtag festival boho chic.

Invariably I look like a Russian babushka on her way to dig up some turnips. I never learn..

I can’t remember if we even considered them cool way back then!

Shut it down!

I bought what I thought was going to be an elegant red tea dress with white spots. It had an envelope neck line which is normally better for the...ahem larger chest. When it arrived I tried it on, both my breasts were completely out. The envelope part completely busted apart. It was obscene! 🤣Anyway I feel your pain OP.

In the 80's coloured tights were fashionable. I had red tights but with my skinny legs my DM said I looked like Emu.

Black were no better apparently I looked like Max Wall.

Apparently when DSIL bought her first pair of stripey tights and showed them off with big clumpy calf-high DMs and very slim legs, DH told her she looked like a pair of golf clubs

I have no idea how he survived his teens...

@ifIwerenotanandroid

I once had a white skirt which I wore with a top & short cardigan. I was looking at something in the meat section of the supermarket when an old bloke came up behind me & asked, "Excuse me, do you have duck breasts?".

I was tempted to say, "No, just my own," but I didn't know if he was innocent or pervy, so I just fixed him with the Death Stare & coldly said, "I don't work here," & he apologised.

Slightly off topic, but in the same general vein, this story reminded me of a hideously embarrassing moment. DH and I were invited to a charity dinner at a very upmarket London hotel as guests of my then boss. I was pretty junior so I was a bit tense to be honest. I went in to the main room with my boss and another couple from work whilst DH took our coats to the cloakroom. When he came to join us he whispered "I hope we get the right coats back - I didn't get a ticket or anything". About 5 minutes later a man walked towards us and DH said "Oh, it looks like they bring the cloakroom tickets to the table". The man, did indeed smile, and pass DH a cloakroom ticket. Then he kissed my boss on the cheek and sat down next to her. Yes. My husband had mistaken my bosses husband for the cloakroom attendant, handed him our coats and walked off. Fortunately he had a great sense of humour and we had a lovely evening after that, but I never quite lived it down.

I went to uni in the early 90s and found my ‘style’, going home for the holidays in leggings with cherry red DMs, a massive shirt and a mans blazer I’d picked up in the oxfam shop. My dad told me I looked like Max Wall. I think I went to the library to found out who he was as this was long before google. I wasn’t happy,

Talking of taikwondo instructors, our martial arts club brought out a ‘special edition’ white hoody that they were super thrilled about. Teamed with the white martial arts pants, they looked like they were off to a crime scene

I bought my first jumpsuit a few years ago, it had three quarter length trousers and a cross over tie waist. A random lady in the changing room said it looked great. I wore it on the school run thinking I looked like effortlessly elegant mum. It was absurdly flattering. Or so I thought, before my 5 year old DS asked me why I had come to school with a dressing gown on. 😩

About 18yrs ago, right after I’d had baby no 3, I desperately needed a winter coat.
I found one that was kind of soft suede, with some brown sheepskin edging..
looking back It was bloody dreadful, and far too long for my 5ft 2, coming down to my knees, but I was convinced it would make me feel great.
The vision in my head was classy and sophisticated.
The person staring back at me in my mirror was a short fat DelBoy 🙈

Does anyone remember catalogues? For those who don't, they worked like ASOS, only they were books.

So, I fancied a new winter coat. "Ooh," I thought, "that grey double-breasted fit-and-flare jobby with the metallic buttons looks classic and warm".

The parcel arrived, I tried the coat on, my DH took one look and said "Are you keeping that? Only you look like a sawn-off Guardsman".

I reached immediately for the returns label.

Better than Herr Flick, I suppose, but not by much.

Best laugh in ages everyone!! Sorry OP but I’m crying 😂😂😂😘

Sell it on market place 😁

When I was pregnant, my belly seemed to pop out over night, and suddenly my clothes didn’t fit. When visiting my aunt she shot upstairs and got a massive faux fur coat out for me. I was very grateful. I also had platinum blonde hair but couldn’t face getting my roots done cause of pregnancy nose. I put on some make up and my new coat and we went for a lovely cou try walk. Much whispering and side eye but I was relatively young and pregnant and single so thought it was that. Nope, lovely aunt who is the gentlest sole on thr planet told me I looked like Myra Hindley and I either had to dye the hair or lose the coat.

I was once given a lovely floppy wide pink sun hat which I thought was the height of sophistication. I found some pale pink plastic sunglasses and thought I had nailed the 60's starlet look.
I unveiled my allure at a family picnic. My Dad took one look and called me Petunia from the infomercials....