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to share the things my BIL has moaned about whilst staying at our house for the past 3 days?

629 replies

BanKittenHeels · 15/09/2019 15:50

Amazon Prime Video doesn’t have the new Quentin Tarantino film that has just come out at the cinema. Ergo Amazon Prime is a waste of money.

The shower screen in the guest bathroom has a stationary rather than hinged shower screen.

That someone used the loo in the middle of the night and he could hear them flush - his bedroom door was 3/4 open.

We have stair gates, so our children don’t break their necks. “Really inconvenient”

The Thai restaurant sent us too many prawn crackers. They sent an appropriate amount for the number of people, actually.

My deodorant is blue. And what?

We don’t have an endless supply of spare clothes in his size and to his taste.

His hair was still in the shower in his en suite when he went back to use it the next day.

The towels I put out for him are white.

Our front gate is too squeaky.

The planes overhead are too low.

We have too many rugs.

He can hear traffic when in the garden.

Our dogs won’t cuddle him.

Our children wear shorts.

The settings of the seats in the car we lent him weren’t to his liking.

He doesn’t like the preset radio stations on our car radio.

My DH (his brother) “doesn’t wear a hat”??????

We don’t have his very specific music taste available to him on vinyl, although we did think to search out appropriate Spotify playlists for him but “that’s not quite the same authenticity”.

The local swimming pool (in a large city) keeps “provincial, British hours”.

Microwave steamers are “excessive gadgets”. Then 30 minutes later, “I suppose you could steam veg in your steamer, have you thought of that?” No shit!

None of the 3 duvets we offered him were suitable.

I use my inhaler too frequently.

Why do I have rosehip oil in the bathroom, it’s of no use to anyone.

Confused HmmAngry

OP posts:
Lunafortheloveogod · 21/09/2019 15:07

Just had to nip out the back and double check my DP wasn’t the culprit Grin.. he’s a fun sponge/human eeyore if he’s stressed.

Our grass was previously too mossy, I showed him how to mulch it with the lawn mower so the grass grew better.. now the grass grows too quick.

Also we mustn’t use weed killer incase it kills any other plants... we have one tree and two bushes ages way from the slabbed patio unless I run like the sound of music with the weed killer they’re safe.

Pressure washing the slabs was too wet..

The dog was too hairy while blowing her coat Grin

I just sit with one eyebrow up or tell him to feck off. When he’s not stressed (thank fuck his job isn’t stressful lol) he’s fine and very cheery.. he doesn’t drink, maybe he needs wine or gin.

BanKittenHeels · 21/09/2019 18:11

YetAnotherBeckyMumsnet ha, how funny that BIL made classics. I think you had best hurry up and change the colour of the website because it’s too similar to my deodorant.

OP posts:
Weezol · 21/09/2019 18:28

Lamps are pretentious “I noticed you weren’t using overhead lighting” yep because I was neither waiting for a taxi to take me to the airport nor is it Christmas morning.

Have you thought sbout setting up a twitter feed to celebrate him? Your additional comments are properly funny.

Using this thread as a reference you've easily got one a day up to Christmas. I'd definitely follow it.

The guy from 'shitmydadsays' did okay out of monetising a mild irritant!

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 21/09/2019 19:11

Just had to nip out the back and double check my DP wasn’t the culprit grin.. he’s a fun sponge/human eeyore if he’s stressed.

You should buy him one of these - styled on JRM, unless I'm very much mistaken Grin

to share the things my BIL has moaned about whilst staying at our house for the past 3 days?
Motoko · 21/09/2019 19:37

@JapaneseBirdPainting Oh dear. That explains everything.

allthesharks · 22/09/2019 00:48

@BanKittenHeels you should let BIL know that he can change the colour on the app. Although I'm sure that none of them are the correct shade.

AutovillaGirl · 22/09/2019 12:04

There is a Jewish saying - "after 3 days fish and guests stink". Time to show him the door.

Binglebong · 22/09/2019 14:18

I'm today trying the recipie you recommended OP (plus extra garlic!). Should it not come up to stratch it will make me rethink your opinion on everything and I will thereon side with your BIL.

No pressure.

Lunafortheloveogod · 22/09/2019 16:54

@WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll
If they’re from Asda 😂 he has a whale one 😂.. he didn’t get the joke. He just said I’m 30, why would he need a whale sponge..

Never even clocked it.. probably worried that the weeds are plotting their revenge, hes convinced they’re rooting through the membrane in the stones...

theoriginalmadambee · 22/09/2019 17:13

@BanKittenHeels

Think you should check this out, you are famous like it or not Shock.

www.foxnews.com/lifestyle/woman-shares-list-houseguests-bonkers-complaints-while-staying-in-her-home

theoriginalmadambee · 22/09/2019 17:28

Disclaimer, I don't read FOX News, lost the thread and Google for it Blush.

Hope you are OK, op.

BanKittenHeels · 23/09/2019 19:22

Hahaha oh no! 🤦‍♀️
Thanks for letting me know.

OP posts:
SchadenfreudePersonified · 24/09/2019 12:22

hurry up and change the colour of the website because it’s too similar to my deodorant.

This comment is a classic in its own right.

SchadenfreudePersonified · 24/09/2019 12:25

FOX NEWS!!!!!

Star Star Star Star Star

That is SO much more prestigious than the Daily Wail.

FredaFrogspawn · 24/09/2019 13:03

I must say, OP, you look splendid in your towel in that article.

Hoppinggreen · 24/09/2019 13:17

We had a family member of DHs stay once. She is Austrian but has lived in NZ for 30 odd years. Amongst her many complaints
DD (13) wore mascara
DS wore crocs (ok, she may have a point here but they are slipper ones)
We have a dog ( told her this many many times before she came)
We have a cat (as above)
Another family member had called her baby “something foreign”
We let her DS drink too much coffee - 2 coffees and he’s 18
Our house is small (4 bed detached)
The driveway is too small to park on (you can get about 6 cars on)
We had “irregular” mealtimes
We went to bed too late - she made us all go at 10
She didn’t like motorways
There was carpet on the stairs
Our peppermint tea wasn’t minty enough
Our dining table is in the wrong place
We were too far from Hull

We lasted 2 days and then pointed her in the direction of MIL’s

OtraCosaMariposa · 24/09/2019 13:20

First time FIL and MIL drove to our new house in Glasgow the first thing they said was that Maryhill Road was too long and we should have warned them. Hmm

theoriginalmadambee · 24/09/2019 13:24

Eerh, I got an idea those sites usually copy each other, so copied the headline from the article and Googled it.

IT IS ALL OVER THE INTERNET, multiple sites.

OK I'm over invested Blush.

Way to go OP, you're a seleb, let's hope BIL doesn't read those.

MzHz · 24/09/2019 13:41

I have an expansive ditch...

Although it’s currently being viewed by a Mr B Johnson...

SchadenfreudePersonified · 24/09/2019 14:15

IT IS ALL OVER THE INTERNET, multiple sites.

Oh, dear!

Any chance your BIL or his wife will see it and recognise his description?

Or is he so unaware that he'll never know, even if it was embroidered on a cushion and used to decorate his personal chair? ("Too many cross-stitches"?)

Bunnylady53 · 24/09/2019 14:29

As someone who has a child’s capacity for joy, I feel incredibly sorry for him as well as for those around him. Perhaps it’s a form of mental illness? Or he’s wired to be negative all the time about everything? Has anyone sat him down for a proper chat or suggested counselling? He’s missing out on so much I think. Some of the OP would be funny if it wasn’t so sad.

Bunnylady53 · 24/09/2019 14:35

coffeeandchocolate9 I think I love you!

theoriginalmadambee · 24/09/2019 14:38

Aww @Bunnylady53 don't feel sad. If he is anything like the minimum two I know, who does this, there is absolutely nothing wrong with him. At most he has a superiority complex. He doesn't see himself as complaining, just trying to guide people about the best solution... Wait for it... His way Grin.

ISmellBabies · 24/09/2019 14:43

They quoted my comment! I knew I was hilarious, but it's nice to have it confirmed by an international news giant. Grin

SchadenfreudePersonified · 24/09/2019 16:11

ISmellBabies

< holds out autograph book >