Aibu to ask for the most "WTF" complaints

[HouseholdPlantMurderer]

You have ever received?

I will start. Not the most ridiculous one, but in my top 10.
Woman demanding that I check in the back for a certain colour of a dress she wanted otherwise she will have me fired. After 5 minutes of her moaning she can't get it anywhere and me trying to explain that it's because it's not even made in the colour she wants, I went. I needed a toilet anyway 🙈

A customer ordered spicy italian sub. It's on a picture. It has a description there, he watched me to put pepperoni and salami in. Came back few minutes later FUMING that it's not vegetarian.... Sent a complaint to a head office about it too.

Also I had many customers actually shout at me about offers not being right. When they've picked up the wrong things. Or even if the till didn't take the offer off. I would never shout at another person over something so trivial.

My friend works as a first responder (providing first aid and emergency care at events such as festivals, football games) and a man had a cardiac arrest at a football game and she used a defibrillator on him, saving his life.

The next week, her organisation received an official complaint from him about her complaining that she had cut through his brand-new football shirt in order to place the debrillator paddles on his chest, and demanding he be refunded the price of his football shirt

He would have been DEAD without her.

My mind still boggles when I think about it!

Much like a pp, I had a call about lack of hot water from a tenant. He was bathing the children then his wife had a bath then he did. I asked him to look at the water tank in the cupboard in his bedroom and compare how much water he thinks it holds compared to how much was needed for 3 consecutive baths. I also told him he needs to put the hot water on for longer should he want more hot water. The realization that he may have missed something vital was clear on his face.

He also complained that the plumber hadn't finished the job properly when he made him leave so he and his wife could go to collect their child from school. The plumber was installing a combination boiler so he could have hot water on demand and just needed to make final checks.

I've learned to grit my teeth, he's otherwise a lovely guy.

I work for a public service. We closed for a major refurbishment which was badly badly needed. Looks amazing now, one of the first people through the door when we re-opened complained because they didn't like the colour of the carpet!

This wasn’t directly to me but it was mind boggling! I took DS to Sports Direct to get a new Liverpool football shirt. When we got to the counter, there was a man absolutely ranting and raving because they didn’t stock Macclesfield Town football shirts. This was in a town at least 2 hours north of Macclesfield. We were in the retail park a while as DS was getting his shirt printed and he left around the same time as us to have a cigarette but must have gone back in as when we went back to collect the shirt the police were arriving... His exact parting words as the police carted him out were “You wait until Macclesfield win the Premier League” 😂😂😂

Had a guy ranting about a letter he had been sent which was outrageous and what EXACTLY was I going to do about it? I waited until all the effing stopped before pointing out the organisation that had written the letter presided at the other end of the street.
Our name was all over the entry, the outside, the waiting area and our badges.
He was livid that we could not help him and demanded that we contact the organisation to sort it out for him. Ten minutes later he is still ranting (He could have walked there by then) and when another client told him to fuck off as he was holding up the queue he wanted me to call them and book him a place in the queue there as he had wasted enough time queuing that day already.

I was working in a new store on a retail park. There was a large neon sign in the car park advertising our opening. A customer came in demanding to speak to the store manager and complain that our sign was too distracting and he'd bumped his car into some railings because of it. I think the manager just gave him the customer service telephone number then we all pissed ourselves laughing after he'd left.

I also had someone complain because I had sent them a quick start user guide and they couldn't be bothered to read it so wanted me to read it to them on the phone instead. The guide was mostly screenshots and very few words. There was only three clicks needed to do the job and the heading was in red so was easy to find (being the most commonly used function).
This was a department head of a huge company.

Used to work for a high street bank, whose logo colours are White and Red which is important.

A complaint came in from a woman that her two precious children were traumatised when being driven down their local high street that the red and white building with the word ‘SANTA...” as part of the name wasn’t Father Christmas’s workshop, and demanded that we send presents to them as compensation for the emotional distress they’d endured, as well as changing our name and corporate colours to avoid such inevitable confusion for other poor children in the future 🙄

Working in a bank some years ago, lady came in to cash a cheque. The account was overdrawn so I had to say no. She went mad, her husband was coming back from exercise (army town), she had 3 kids, 2 dogs, no food in the house, what was she supposed to do? She waved her hand at my till drawer, said I had loads of money in there (true) and why couldn't I give her some!

Ooh a recent one! Customer came to the fag counter, asked for a certain brand of cigarettes. I checked whether he meant the ones we had, he asked if they were the same as the one he wanted and I said they were the only ones we had in that brand. He went mental, said he couldn't be dealing with the choice, what if it's the wrong ones, don't I know what one's he wants. (No, cos im not fucking psychic!) He told me he was very stressed, he's going to go to the train station and throw himself under the train as he can't deal with deciding if these cigarettes are the right ones or not. I'm so proud of myself that I didn't say that he won't be needing the cigarettes then!

Before i recount my tale of retail woe...i want to make it clear that i am no skinny minnie.

I worked in Tesco and I had a lady who brought back some jodphur style trousers It was 1994 and they were fashionable. They were not the thin fabric type you get nowadays but thick elasticated ones.

A lady approached the desk with a pair of leggings in her bag to complain they had broken. She was at least a size 20. The jodphurs had clearly burst at the seams on both legs and the elastic had pinged out of the fabric haphazardly. the waistband had snapped also and there was a huge split in the bottom area. To add to the scenario they smelt like satans jockstrap and they had egg stains all down them.
When I looked at the label they were a size 10. I asked if they were for herself and she replied that they were and because they were stretchy they should fit her.

My boss made me give her a refund!!

Another complaint I had was that a chicken had given their family the shits!! So he brought in an ice cream tub containing his families "waste" that he had collected from his sewer. He let me open the tub first before telling me what it was. I almost vomited!!!

Working in a food store a customer returned an empty carton of ice cream after realising once everyone ate it that there was black things in it. She was disgusted that her children ate it and demanded a refund.

Until I pointed out the vanilla beans in her vanilla icecream

Very outing, as a teacher official complaint that led to an interview with governors that I was seen drinking in a pub with a man who was not my husband.

I used to work for the company who manage marks and Spencer’s customer service. Some of the customers were most entitled idiots I have ever spoken to

Every Valentine’s Day we would have calls from men who had ordered sexy lingeries/flowers for their mistress but accidentally sent it to the their marital home or used their joint email address with their wife to make the order. They would panic and ask us to cancel the email ( not possible) change the address on the order etc. Sometimes we could change the address but often it was too late. I would love to have witnessed the fallout.

We had complaints about using interracial couples and mixed race children in adverts as it wasn’t ‘traditional’ Britain!

Very outing, as a teacher official complaint that led to an interview with governors that I was seen drinking in a pub with a man who was not my husband.

Jesus, where are you? Gilead?

Run up to Christmas one year, colleague was leaving on holidays a few days early so set an out of office directing enquiries to me. I worked to the last working day before Christmas and then went on leave (compulsory shut down between boxing day and new year) setting my out of office explaining we would respond on our return.

Came back to a furious email complaining it was disgraceful that he had forward his query to me as directed by colleague's out of office and I had also been out of the office. He had emailed us on Christmas Day! It wasn't even an industry that had emergency enquiries and was just a routine matter regarding publishing some work in the future.

I work for a company that sell cars.

Once had a customer call to ask how to put the seat belt on. There was nothing special about the seat belt at all.

This person was a named driver on the vehicle so had obviously travelled in a car before.

Just had to name change as I tell everyone about these two complaints from being a hotel manager.

1. Woman orders gammon with pineapple...complains that the skin on the pineapple was too tough and has scratched her throat. Genuinely burst out laughing as I thought she was joking

1. Chinese gentleman complained on checkout that the couple in the room next to him had been too loud during the night...followed it up by giving me a 5 minute rendition of the orgasm he had heard through the wall whilst my area manager stood behind him barely able to breathe.

I was once sent a very wordy, long winded letter about how disgusting/unprofessional/inappropriate it was for branch staff (at a bank) to have been dressed up.
It went into great detail about how the staff members in costume needed to be disciplined, preferably sacked, and needed to personally write an apology letter to every customer who had visited the branch that day.

It was for Children In Need 🙄.

Many years ago I used to work on a train company telephone centre. There was a bomb scare in the station and not trains were entering- person screaming and shouting that he wanted to get on the train and if he was willing to risk it then so should the staff.
Being told that they hoped my mother dies before I see her next by an unhappy customer.
A women insisting in another job that we had blocked the telephone signal in the hotel so they would use the overpriced phone line. Nothing to do with the fact this was early 2000s and in the middle of fucking nowhere and coverage was nonexistent. She went off it at me and was so furious as she had racked up a £200 telephone bill, she had to pay mind!

Worked in a high street retailer which shall remain nameless many moons ago. Thick bitch Customer had bought several items (don't remember exact numbers for the sake of convenience let's say four of them and they came to £20 altogether) and then had used a £5 off voucher, so her bill was £15. She then came in to return two of the items. Had the receipt, great, all fine and dandy so far. But then kicked up an almighty fuss when the till wouldn't give her the full-price refund for the items and instead knocked £1.25 off each to account for the £5 off discount voucher. Politely explained to the customer even if I wanted to I could not override it as, crucially, she had not paid full price for the items ( OK I could ask a manager to override it if I really wanted to but she was wrong and being an arse so I chose not to ). Called a manager over - the only one in that day backed me up entirely but very rarely dealt with the tills so said I had the final call. I still said no. She rang customer services in front of me. Customer services then asked her to put me on to them and apologised for her wankery but asked if there was anything I could do to override the transaction - again, I imagine the customer service lady working in the phone centre wasn't familiar with the till set up - I still said no.

After about 90 minutes of huffing and puffing and walking around the shop giving me daggers lady begrudgingly announced she was going to accept the discounted refund but she'd "been in touch with customer service again" (bollocks, she'd been walking around the shop snarling me) and they were going to "send her the £2.50 to make up for it in the post" (again, bollocks.)

"Jolly good," I said, "Don't spend it all at once "

Still makes me laugh to think of it all these years on. I've legitimately never met people as stupid as I did in that line of work. I could tell many, many more tales about that place...

Patients family complained they had been ignored and staff had walked past when they had asked staff what their mum had had for lunch that day.... Staff were swiftly moving the crash trolley to a resus of cardiac arrest

I found a phone in a field near a circus tent whilst out walking my dog. It was unlocked so I phoned the "home" number and left them a message on their answer machine explaining I'd found the phone.

10 minutes later I had a call from an irate woman demanding I give her phone back, I said I'd left a message and explained where I found it, she said I know, but I dont remember losing the phone so you must have taken it

Fuck knows why, but I gave her my address and when she came to pick it up she snatched it from my hand and stormed off.

She told me that if such a prestigious facility as ours had complained properly the company would have not raised prices for all 2 million of their customers.

Yeah, I can see her point tbh.