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Original poster

Anyone want to come and mourn the reality vs expectation of new purchases with me?

689 replies

Swimminguphill · 07/12/2017 15:16

I bought this beautiful jacket online. In my mind I'd look like Blondie in the 80s, very rock and roll and all round awesome. In reality I look like a giant angry teddy bear/yeti. I have broad shoulders and a bust although slim in general, and it doesn't do me any favours. I wanted it for ages and it's now sold out, and so the joy of getting it in my size just in time is sadly wasted. It is a beautiful jacket - just not on me! Anybody else want to come and mourn reality vs fantasy with me?

OP posts:
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Talisin · 14/12/2017 22:38

If it helps, Lentil, I have that jumpsuit and it looks great. And I am a very normal, could do with losing half a stone, size 12.

leftwiththedognow · 14/12/2017 22:52

Oh haircuts....
Expectation: Anne Hathaway simple pixie cut and colour
Reality : Husband's face when he saw it

littlebillie · 15/12/2017 02:25

HUSH dress meh

littlebillie · 15/12/2017 02:30

I had a Lady Diana hair and cut in my teens and my aunt wrote back to my mum say my DB looked a little different.

I was wearing a blazer shirt and tie and well it took me years to get over it real teenage angst 😩

littlebillie · 15/12/2017 02:32

I think what my years have taught me wear what suits you not the current fads. Most of the classics look good on me but now and again I try something new 🙄

Lentilbaby · 15/12/2017 12:27

Thanks @Talisin ! It looks very forgiving on a new mum’s tum!

Original poster
Swimminguphill · 15/12/2017 13:41

I think ratonastick wins this thread with 'Cluedo Piece' I nearly died laughing when I read that...

OP posts:
Original poster
Swimminguphill · 15/12/2017 13:43

Sorry it is Gingernaut laughing too much to pay attention...

OP posts:
TheOtherGirl · 15/12/2017 15:07

Iconic Alexander McQueen skull scarf

Fantasy; urban rock-chick chic.

Reality; Jack Sparrow's menopausal Mum.

CountFosco · 15/12/2017 16:27

Had a Christmas lunch at work today. Refuse to wear a Christmas jumper but did wear a sequined skirt with black ankle boots, opaque tights and jumper. Was going for seasonal relaxed glamour. But at 8am in the morning? Walk of shame.

TheOtherGirl · 15/12/2017 16:43

Few years ago wore a full length, sparkly, halter neck dress, with quite a deep scooped neckline. Was pleased that my brand new WonderBra straps could be fixed in a halter-neck position.

Felt very sleekly glamorous in my NBSS (no bra strap showing) dress and pretended I looked like the blonde from Girls Aloud in The Gift video.

Except.............................I'm a 34FF and the Wonder Bra hoiked my norks to just under my chin and not a single bloke could look me in the eye all night. They were transfixed. I looked like Bessy, the buxom bar wench who worked down at The Olde Bull & Bush circa 1756.

Wonder Bra went in bin the next morning.

BreakfastAtSquiffanys · 15/12/2017 16:47

Back in the 80s I had a lovely black linen dress, narrow A line, full length.
Buttons all down the front and a little stand up collar.

I loved loved loved that dress.

I now realise that I must have looked like a Catholic priest in drag

TheOtherGirl · 15/12/2017 16:51

Maybe Father Ralph de Briccasant in The Thorn Birds, yes?

TossDaily · 15/12/2017 17:08

Long woolly coatigan.

Hope - Pinterest-worthy cosy Scandi chic, understated winter sexiness.

Reality - the sofa's on the move again.

IHaveBrilloHair · 15/12/2017 18:39

Oh shit, I own a long coatigan, I think it makes me look Skandi and snuggly, but am now worried people will be thinking their armchair has developed legs.
time to put that in the horror, never to be worn again, wardrobe

BreakfastAtSquiffanys · 15/12/2017 19:14

@TheOtherGirl
If I'd looked as sexy in it as Ralph de Bricassart, I'd be happy!

addle · 15/12/2017 19:22

love this thread. so cheering. so vv funny

ItsNotUnusualToBe · 15/12/2017 21:05

Intention: warm snuggle drapery wrap
Mirror: womble

Tortycat · 16/12/2017 00:50

Ex bf moved to italy. I went to visit and thought I'd try to look a bit more stylish, so as not to be outdone by Italian ladies. Bought a black shirt dress and thought it looked great until he said i looked like a sinister nurse

Janetjanetjanet · 16/12/2017 03:23

ItsNotUnusualToBe

Intention: warm snuggle drapery wrap
Mirror: womble

^
GrinGrin

quirkychick · 16/12/2017 07:31

I have quite wide shoulders, so my mistakes have been things that made me look like an American Football player...
White, chunky knit fairisle sweater, hoping for cool, winter/cosy/icelandic vibe > big woolly marshmallow
Furry gilet, going for snuggly boho chic > Sully from Monsters Inc
And when pg, beautiful, terracotta peasant blouse, hoping for relaxed earthy mother look > great big fat orange

TossDaily · 16/12/2017 08:09
goose1964 · 16/12/2017 12:41

Hi gingernut I also had the infamous poodle cut.My hair is long and wavy and if I wear a headband even a gorgeous one I look like the hon Ffiona Hyphen-Hyphen.Im only missing the land rover , Labrador and stately pile in the country

TheOtherGirl · 16/12/2017 17:33

I paid a small fortune (well some boyfriend did) to have an acid, spiral perm at the trendiest salon in town, back in 1989.

Me: tumbling Pre-Raphaelite, corkscrew ringlets cascading down my back.

Mirror: Crystal Tips (but without Alastair).

clumsyduck · 16/12/2017 19:04

sing song Grin

I'm the opposite on changing rooms I hate them - the lighting , the mirrors eughh as soon as I step in I hate what I'm already wearing before I even get to trying on the new thing !! 😂