OMG .. Jon Ronson's speaking voice ..

[Twiglett]

NOT what I imagined at all

just seen a strange ad on More4 with him in it

he sounds so drippy

oh gawd I'm not going to enjoy his columns any more now, cos I'll hear the weedy crappy voice

God i meant woteva. Sorry.

'Green ink brigade' is what they said, longing for a fight but they all seem to have gone to bed

next issue maybe, the colour supplements normally go off early in the week.

Who is Jon Ronson?

no he hasn't, 100x. i'm surprised.

it seemed such an odd thing to do for starters, because he told me he didn't know what i'd said, but now that i've actually found the thread and posted it on here he should at least respond to my email asking him for clarification as to my 'offences'. because i really, really don't think i said anything dreadful. i mean, really...

who knows, perhaps he'll ask me if i've got Pruni's, NQC's, edam's and everyone else's email addresses as well?

Aitch, are you planning to sell them to him for money?

Oh god, I should be packing!

seems that you cannot criticise anyone without calls of 'jealous' being shouted at you. Have been accused of being jealous of Victoria Beckham toady - how insulting is that!

Also JR has some security issues - loved 100x (I think) post about him hanging outside windows at dinner parties and leaping in if they slag him off.

JR - use that in your column.

oh yes, aloha. i never write anything down without expecting to be paid for it at some point. (well, apart from countless MN posts, obv.) go and pack.

Message withdrawn

Thank you BB, actually I said he would burst into tears in the flowe bed NOT leap in at all.

Hmm. Perhaps he won't then, perhaps the whole thing has made him a bit shivery and sick-feeling. It would be.

aloha - where are you going? With the packing and all?

oh fgs, can't type, have cold. It would ME and another error above. Why am I bothering to correct them even? Sneeze.

i blooming well complimented him on that thread as well. for the last time, i might add.

i don't mind having a discussion with someone if i've hurt their feelings and i absolutely do not mind apologising if i've done something wrong but it's just silly bollocks for him to have written to me without actually having seen the thread in question.
plus i do think that given that i've been reading that paper and others he's written for and therefore contributing to paying his mortgage for the last 20 years, he should think about acting like a grown-up rather than behaving in a manner that confirms every negative thing i thought about him.

Could have been Elaine you know? In a fit of pique because she's SICK TO DEATH of JR shutting himself in the bathroom and crying like a baby every time he reads something horrid about himself?

Majorca, with sunshine (please god) a swimming pool and four children. BLISS!
Love you all, will put this thread on watch!

Hurrah for aloha. Have a ball. It'll be hot and sunny, and we'll be sitting in the pissy rain still talking about Jon Ronson.

we just got called boring turds on the guardian web page, lol. i love the internet.

oooh yes, aloha, have a great time.

oh yes - he is much more likely to cry in the flower beds than jump in the window - maybe he gets his wife to jump in the window..

lolololol you got it BB. She jumps in and tells them off, and they love her and invite her sit down and tell them funny stories, and he sulks all the more, out there with the damp in his trainers and that itchy plant getting in his hair.

I'm surprised Big Cook and Little Cook's partners haven't been on tonight. They're getting far more of a pasting. 'Specially Big Cook and his cold, dead eyes

Packing is VASTLY overated.....5 mins before you leave get bin liner out from under sink.....rush madly around house chucking any old thing in......at airport have a good sort through of all the junk, ditch the rubbish and top up your luggage from lovely airport shops.....+ buy nice new,( pref bright pink...so you can see it going round and round at the other end...and don't pick up german s&m's case by mistake...IT happened to DH..),suitcase too.
Obviously you will have great excuse for lots of holiday shopping at destination too...
Get nanny,( or similar in nanny-less households...), to do sensible packing for DCs.
This is 'packing a la mozhe'....never fails,.
Enjoy !!

i don't have a nanny, mozhe... who do i ask to be my 'or similar'? how's wee tristan doing?

This thread is hurting my eyes. You're all illitt, iliterrat, none of you can spell or do proper grammer. You no-name loons.

oh this thread is SO funny
thank you everyone, you've cheered me right up

They also called us "boring turds" and "no-name loons"

hold on, I have a great idea. Let's EMAIL them and tell them how upset we are. No no, scratch that, let's email someone who hasn't actually read the thread, tell them vaguely what happened, and then get THEM to email the people and tell them we are very cross.