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Original poster

is this the worst and most self-absorbed piece of journalism ever written? (most amusing)

453 replies

whensantagotstuckupAITCHimney · 13/12/2006 23:12

Without a word of a lie, this was printed in The Evening Standard the other day after the tornado. A friend of mine has picked it up and thinks it's worth celebrating in all its pompous, un-self-aware, London meeja whore bourgeois pig awfulness. it's not a piss-take. really it isn't.

"My tornado hell. This is to celebrate and remember the excellent article by freelance writer Caroline Phillips from the Evening Standard. When it was printed is irrelevant, the point is to keep it alive forever, long after the last landfill has rotted away, we are all dust, and your children's children's children may revel in the words contained herein." here

OP posts:
NotQuiteCockney · 14/12/2006 14:26

Oh, come on, MI, if you were to write about this sort of thing, it'd either be funny on purpose, or not funny (but good).

I don't think there's anything wrong with a journo writing about something newsworthy that happened to them! It's the mind-bogglingly self-centred insanity of this piece that's ludicrous.

It does seem American, somehow, but lots worse. I think we (ok, I) expect Brits to have a sense of perspective, and a bit of self-mockery.

ruty · 14/12/2006 14:26

as should she be i mean.

noddyholder · 14/12/2006 14:26

my favourite is 'the side return exploded!'Bloody hell it is one of the funniest things I have ever read and am still unsure if it isn't even slightly tongue in cheek

bakedpotato · 14/12/2006 14:33

(Please can I email adrian's headstand to someone?
I've tried member profiles but it won't work)

DarrellRivers · 14/12/2006 14:35

I know an elderly Beryl who lives in Kensal Rise/Willesden Green.She lives in Staverton Road though which I didn't think was a
affected. She is south african and quite chippy and would certainly tell CP to eff off.She has a dog and still smokes like a trooper.Certainly adds colour to the up and coming area
What do you reckon, could it be her, Beryl.
She has a whole house thoughand would you put your kitchen in the loft if this was the case.

suedonim · 14/12/2006 14:35

That's the funniest 'Round Robin' I've read so far this year!

motherinfurrierfestivefrock · 14/12/2006 14:35

I'd bungle it, BP. Madly.

taylormama · 14/12/2006 14:36

"The Apocalypse was not all bad" - well that is alright then - honestly everytime i read this there is another gem to be found

Original poster
whensantagotstuckupAITCHimney · 14/12/2006 14:37

i don't know how to do them, bp, sorry. i know stgeorge is good at them.

OP posts:
ruty · 14/12/2006 14:44

dying to see that photo but have no idea how to do member profiles.

doyouwantfrankincensewiththat · 14/12/2006 14:48

the message I shall take away from this thread is , don't worry if the house is a mess because a tornado might hit tomorrow & it would be much more traumatic if you'd made an effort to tidy first.

bakedpotato · 14/12/2006 14:49

I've sent it to contactus@mumsnet, in a fit of festive optimism

Original poster
whensantagotstuckupAITCHimney · 14/12/2006 14:50

once again, pmsl at doyou...

that's the spirit of the blitz talking, right there...

OP posts:
Donbean · 14/12/2006 14:51

OMG Catherine Tate...goosberry and cinamon Yogurt any one!!!

What a knob. Are there REALY people like this out there????

CliffRichardSucksEggsinHell · 14/12/2006 14:53

I can only hope to write like that one day, she is an inspiration to all.

DINOsaurmummykissingsantaclaus · 14/12/2006 14:55

One of my neighbours writes for the Evening Standard. I'll have to ask him what he thinks of Ms Phillips.

expatinscotland · 14/12/2006 14:58

You all are so harsh and unsupportive!

I mean, is no one allowed to moan about their misfortune now?

She's got a lot on her plate just now! How dare you all judge her!

C'mon, where are all the Righteous Indignation posters when you need 'em?

HumphreyCushiONtheFirstNoel · 14/12/2006 14:59

I've been deeply disappointed by the lack of misplaced moral outrage on this thread too, Expat!

UnquietDad · 14/12/2006 15:00

You do all know that Claridge's STARTS at £259 per night plus VAT... don't you?

What kind of insurance assessor is going to send them there?? One she's secretly knocking off, maybe?

expatinscotland · 14/12/2006 15:01

I think we should invite her to the gift swap .

UnquietDad · 14/12/2006 15:02

sod the gift swap, get her on here doing a Q&A.

"Caroline, what's the best way of fixing up a floating shelf?"

"I need to know, Caroline, how DID you find such an excellent trauma specialist?"

CouldEquallyHaveBeenAnAardvark · 14/12/2006 15:39

Oh...dear...God...

CouldEquallyHaveBeenAnAardvark · 14/12/2006 15:41

I want to send her a Good Hotels Guide. I'll post it to Claridge's pronto.

I'm glad people like this exist though. We do need people to POSL at, surely?

Original poster
whensantagotstuckupAITCHimney · 14/12/2006 15:47

bad news, hunker... i'm afraid moondog means to have her first against the wall when the revolution comes. i think that's next tuesday... she's been a little sketchy with the details, element of surprise and all that.

OP posts:
ruty · 14/12/2006 15:50

oh yes, the trauma specialist. I would like to think the session went a bit like this 'Dear God you stupid woman pull yourself together and start putting things in perspective.' Anything else would be a tragic waste of money.

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