The cute --weird-- rituals/jokes you do with your DP...

[YouBetterWerk]

Here are just a few of the personal little in jokes and rituals we have, but the more I think about it the less I think other couples have them!

1. Puffins. Obsessed with them. Don't know where it came from, but we have notepads, cards, nicknames, all surrounding these bloody Puffins.
2. 'Sunday Morning Face' - The blank excited stare, pushed right up against my face every Sunday morning.
3. 'Bobble Hat Song' - Every time we see someone with a bobble hat on, we sing a song. I would post the lyrics but it is copyright.
4. 'Stair Necessities' - Here we have a song we sing to the tune of 'Bare Necessities' every time I go up the stairs to bed. He will also change the lyrics to reflect what we've done that day, giving it that lovely personal touch.

This is just a small example, there are dozens more. We are both grown adults.

I asked my hairdresser about hers the other day and she looked at me like I was crazy and said 'Sometimes I guess we say goodbye in a funny way'

Please reassure me it's not just us!

Me and DH talk to each other and the dog in funny squeaky voices we like being childish when we're alone we also tease each other and play fight constantly and have funny names for stuff and weird little jokes and things we do with each other your normal don't worry

DP and I invented a song about coconuts that's very catchy. It could be number one probably. We invent a new songs on most long car journeys, much to the DC's embarrassment. There was also a recent one entitled "it's not really music" where we both rapped/MCd in turn and shouted "but it's not really music" as the chorus - that was in repose to a shit rap type song on the radio.

We do "I've got the key, I've got the secret" too.

We also change the names of TV programmes, Game of thrones=game of tits (because nudity!) Fringe=Cringe, House=House house baby (to the vanilla ice song tune but I don't know why?), etc.

We voice the dogs, Dog1 is Russian, likes to kill things (possibly an assassin?) and swears a lot. Dog2 is very stupid and speaks with terrible grammar and gets on Dog1's nerves.

Both dogs also have their own theme tunes. Dog1 is a James bond song w.lyrics changed. Dog2 sings hers to the tune of cheeky girls song

We sing a song about shepherds pie that goes "shepherds pie, shepherds pie, I'm gon get me some shepherds pie" , would you believe, when we cook shepherds pie.

We used to say 'so does your mum' in response to 'you like x thing' but it's become a bit of a competition to gross the other out recently, eg:
DP: "this bagel is really moist"
Me: So is your mum

Probably loads more

We don't seem to have many of these :(
But we do have to pronounce 'butter' in a northern accent and apples are generally bapples now.

When ever we pass certain buildings one of us will tell the other a whole made up history about it. Same fake history every time.

Just thought of some more..

We sometimes pretend to kiss the other but actually blow really hard into the others mouth/lick the others face/something else stupid.

If one of us yawns the other sticks their finger in their mouth to spoil their yawn enjoyment. Sometimes DP bites my finger when I do that though so I have to be quick!

Any words that can be made into swears are. For example I just text DH to remind him to eat the leftover bollocknaise when he gets in

We also refer to each other by pet name followed by 'bobline' eg wifebobline

I love this thread

If DH wants a sip of my drink, he has to say 'please can I have a sip of your tasty beverage'.

He can't just ask for a blow job. He has to say, 'you may filate me'.

We have a song. After the kids/dogs have been bathed, we sing 'he's clean and soft and lovely and nice, his name is .....'

And we have a sausage and beans dance

And we don't call each other by our names. We call each other babbagumpington. I even have a bubagump tattoo in tribute to our nickname

Ooh love this!!

1. When we have our food shop delivered we sing 'Tesco, Tesco man, I want to be a Tesco man' to the tune of 'Macho Man'

1. We have a woollen monkey who we give a full personality to, one which is essentially suave and that of an international spy/jazz artist. We create fanciful scenarios about his life, secret lair, ability to woo ladies, his nemesis etc etc. Oh and he does saucy dancing to many TV show theme tunes!

1. If a small pile of objects gathers that requires tidying, we refer to it endlessly as 'you've got piles', 'you've got massive piles' etc

1. Weekends start with ever more outlandish and exaggerated 'weekend waves'

1. We bitch, jibe and pass judgement on many TV programmes...and call this throwing massive scornballs. Like other posters we also have other names for TV programmes eg. MasterChief, Strictly Come Bum, 4 in a bum (4 in a bed)...mostly around bums and balls!

1. Searching for errant hairs is referred to as 'hairwatch' or 'lobewatch'!

1. We post a 'dream seed' in each other's ears to create nice dreams.

1. We refer to putting our pyjamas on as 'having a massive pooj'!

1. We enjoy singing in the style of David Bowie, especially to 'Let's Dance'

Ugh there are loads more!

When DH says "I love you" I answer, "I know". I never say "I love you".

DH always makes a whiny noise when he yawns, to which I always respond, "Don't yawn like Benny!" - benny is a jack russell. He's not our dog.

DH gives absolutely everyone a nickname- it's often difficult to work out who he's talking about.

God I love this thread.

When dh and I first met, there was a house painted purple next to the bus stop outside his flat. Every time we go past this house, even though it isn't purple any more, we have to say "purple house purple house" in a stoned voice. The DC are embarrassed by this.

We constantly say the same thing at the same time, and do a mini fist bump ( I'm cringing now) Whenever we settle down to watch something like Masterchef, where we know we will, for example, simulataneously shout "wanker" at Gregg, we sit with our fists together in readiness.

We are both chronically indecisive and settle things with "rock paper scissors". This has settled decisions such as where to get takeaway from, and shamefully, names of our DC.

If I have slept on one side all night, I wake up with a sore ear. I say "T.E.S" which means Tender Ear Syndrome, and dh squishes my ear gently with his fingers. It feels bad but good!

If DH is pushing me in my wheelchair, if I want to stop and look at something, DH pretends he isn't going to stop, and pushes me past before reversing. No idea why but this cracks me up every time.

Dh also cannot tell the difference between a skirt and a dress and if for example, I ask him to pass me my red skirt, he will pass me a dress. Every Single Time. I always get exasperated and he says, in the manner of Basil Fawlty "quite right dear, I only did it to annoy you".

We have been together over 20 years, I'm sure there is loads more. We are always laughing together, even though life is a bit shit atm. He can always make me smile.

best thread ever

love this little insight into people's relationships, im actually smiling here.

we are lucky to have our significant others really.

another one here for rock,paper,scissors

Sossidge Just reminded me that dh calls my boobs Linsey and Dawn after Linsey Dawn Mckenzie...

Where is the poster who in a previous similar thread said she and her DH said 'BAB' in a robot voice to determine where each other was in the house? That made me cry with laughter.

that reminds me, dp and I have a zombie password or that's what we call it basically if I begin a sentence with 'right' he will automatically say 'left' we have decided that if dp ever fails to respond in this way then I must kill him as he is a zombie.

also, every time I yawn I have a habit of saying 'aye aye aye' during the yawn, dp responds every time with 'jay jay jay'

we never say 'I love you' instead we say 'you know that don't you'

peanutbuttery I really hope the tesco delivery man hears you both one day (and joins in?)

yes I did mean aww that's bloomin' lovely

This is such a gorgeous thread - that insight into the rare, private truths of a relationship rather than what the outside world sees.

I act (local on stage) but I am shitter than shit at accents. Dh will always shout (not when I'm on stage!) 'It's Welsh! Is it Welsh?' No matter what accent it is. Whenever he helps me learn lines he always reads the other characters with really ooo-aaaarrr bumpkin west country accents (we live in Devon but don't have the accent. If we did I'd probably just sound Welsh.)

I am also great at impressions - but one time only. Literally the first time I do a new impression it will be spot on. I will never ever come close to sounding like the subject ever again in my life. Whenever I try a new impression dh says 'fantastic but oh no! Now you'll never be able to play them in the movie of their life!'

Some people might remember me saying this from a thread at Christmas (under another ame) but whenever we see someone overacting as hard as possible in a film in an effort to create a quirky, wacky character we say 'they're creating a beloved family favourite for the ages' after we watched the film Mr Magorium's Shitty Emporium and decided Dustin Hoffman clearly acted his whole way through the film thinking that's what he was doing. Sometimes we'll just nod sagely and say 'Magorium syndrome.'

Where is the poster who in a previous similar thread said she and her DH said 'BAB' in a robot voice to determine where each other was in the house?

Not me, but my husband does similar. If I am in a different room, he will give a little 'peep' every few minutes or so. We call it his 'radar' and its sole purpose is to inform me that he is not dead yet.

Oh thank goodness, we are normal!

Brilliant thread!

We make farty noises as an expression of love. He who makes the best, most accurate farty noise loves the most. Our almost 3yo ds has started doing it too

We voice that cats too, boy cat is a stoner duuude and girl cat is an uptight princess with psychopathic tendencies.

We speak with a broad somerset accent at any opportunity, especially fun when having fake arguments about "the farm" and whose turn it is to plough "field 4" in public.

If one of us calls the other from somewhere in the house, we shout

"Chaka Demus?"

And the other replies

"Yes Pliers?"

Which in think came from DH calling me chick, which became chickadee, which became Chaka Demus....you get the picture. But now it's interchangeable

Feelpants, he doesn't even like her! Haha! I can't remember how it started, but she a not even famous anymore. He did it yesterday for the first time in months, when I asked him to google something really dull for me, he seemed to be typing with too much enthusiasm, and I said 'you're going to show me fucking LinzziiiDawn McKenzie aren't you?' Just as he proudly turned the laptop screen to face me.

DH is loving this thread too!! Reading it in bed separately..... def needs to be in classics.....
Favourite one so far is "you may filate me" thought might be one of my friends as her dh is similarly hilarious ;)

The once magnificently named Southern Counties Agricultural
Trading Society had a branch near us. It became traditional to say 'I'm off to SCATS' followed by apologetic cough with hand over mouth and a furtive snigger.

Also DH is always wanting his back scratched and says 'What is it that's causing this itching, is there a spot etc...?' Now I get in first 'OH MY GOD, what's THAT???' He always tells me to fuck off. And we laugh.

Ha Sossidge!! Not sure that dh likes her either.... just google image searched her myself as couldn't remember what my boobs namesake looked like....
cracking pair to be fair to her, mine def don't live up to the name, especially these days!!!

We have a thing about long cardboard tubes (paper towels, cling film etc.). Whenever you get one, you have to find the other person and say something ridiculous in a rousing la-di-da voice. DH's last one was a brilliant Rex Harrison-style "Why don't the English....learn how to speeeeeeak?".

I'm already plotting my next move...