You daft apeth

[Kasterborous]

No, not you but I heard this phrase yesterday and haven't heard it for ages. We used to say it when anyone had done something daft, but in a lighthearted way.

Another old favourite is 'crosspatch' as in 'don't be a crosspatch' when someone is being -well - cross.

[Orangeanddemons]

No, I've just looked it up. It is an old naval term, but it gave its name to chop sticks, as the Chinese seemed to eat so rapidly with them!

[YerDaftApeth]

Good at least it's a good meaning!

[hoobypickypicky]

I'm looking at you all a bit old fashioned at all these memories. BTW, my hands are filthy, as black as nookers knocker because I've been messing around from arsehole til breakfast time cleaning up.

I haven't a cat in hell's chance of getting anything done but, as my greatnan would have said, fiddlesticks to it ducks!

[hoobypickypicky]

Oh my giddy aunt, I'll go to the foot of my stairs if I haven't thought of another couple!

[ILoveAFullFridge]

Many of my friends' parents used to say "Who do you think we are? Rothschilds?" whenever kids left lights on or did other wasteful things.

[GemmaTeller]

DH says 'as black as newgates knocker'

[GemmaTeller]

I'm from oop north and DH from the east end, sometimes I come out with these phrases just to wind him up even after 20 years

[DownstairsMixUp]

My Nan says that still GemmaTeller i didn't think anyone else said it!

[Helliecopter]

I use 'apeth' too, and mither
I actually said "eh up" to someone the other day. Made me laugh at myself. Could I be any more northern?!

[YerDaftApeth]

You could have said 'hows tha doin' as well to be more northern

[poii10]

In Manchester one of Lewises was a prostitute because the Ladies used to gather in the archade next to the shop.

[FastWindow]

Smack in the eye pie for dinner

Go and play on the M4

Go and count grass

All my charming dad's replies to childlike enquiry.

[FastWindow]

Smack in the eye pie for dinner

Go and play on the M4

Go and count grass

All my charming dad's replies to childlike enquiry.

[FastWindow]

Stupid phone! Sorry.

[fanoftheinvisibleman]

I still do use Daft Apeth. My mum used to call me Fanny Adams as a kid and db was Our Horace .

Rare as rocking horse shit, gi the dog a bone, you look a right bobby dazzler and if thee had half a brain tha'd be dangerous - all these were used regular as well as loads of others on here. If I'm honest I still use loads of them.

I was in my mid 20's before I even realised mardy was a regional thing!

[fanoftheinvisibleman]

Oh and up thread I read as Na then being used as a greeting...I do that sometimes to. Na then..
How does? Or how ya diddling?

[YerDaftApeth]

Today I've called DD a Daft Apeth and a giddy kipper.

[MERLYPUSS]

Tied up like a sack of washing/ like a sack of shit tied ugly - untidy person
Well shit in a hat an punch it - I declare!
Done up like a dog's dinner/pussy's lunch - dressed up
More front than Woolworths - Cheeky person
In and out like a fiddler's elbow/ up and down like a whores drawers/ like a fart in a colander - can't sit still.
We use 'chews bread for our ducks'
Shit order - posh dress

[YerDaftApeth]

We used to say 'more front than Blackpool' rather than Woolworths but same meaning.

Hadn't heard about 'done up like a pussy's lunch' dogs dinner one I knew, might have to use it now!

[mrspolkadotty]

YY to daft apeth, born in a barn, mithering, ginnels, teacakes etc. East Lancashire here.

DH is always most confused when i tell the kids to "Get up them dancers" - Go up the stairs.

My Grandad's favourites include "Rough as a badgers arse (either feeling rough or describing someone as)" and "Well i'll show my arse at big lamp (suprised)"

Grandma - "Well i go t'back of our church" and "Yer pots for rags you are (daft)"

[ILoveAFullFridge]

It's "born on a bus" in London

[saintmerryweather]

if we were sulking we would get 'pick your chin up off the floor' usually followed by 'Appy Annie'. used to piss me off even more!

my mum used to say 'dink' as in 'you silly dink' (affectionately!)

[ProfYaffle]

'bobbins' is more a thing of little worth, so instead of being rubbish, something's bobbins.

I love Skrike (cry), apparently it comes from the Scandinavian for scream so probably came over with the vikings. I think it was the Killing Series One which ended with the killer saying "I heard her scream" really slowly and I recognised skrike (or something similar).

My Nan had a great turn of phrase. If one of us grandkids moaned that one of us had sweets and the others didn't she'd say "And if I give her a shitty stick would you want one an' all?", well no, but she's got a Wagon Wheel.

We also had 'How's yer belly for spots?' and 'Spotty Muldoon', no idea where that one came from.

[Katinkia]

'Stuck there like a shag on a rock'
That's one I've seen on Digitalspy and I immediately loved it. I've used a few times but I just get funny looks not unusual
Here in Hull people say 'chowing' to describe people arguing or making a fuss. That's how I've interpreted it anyway.
'Rough as a bears arse' is also one of my personal faves.