You daft apeth

[Kasterborous]

No, not you but I heard this phrase yesterday and haven't heard it for ages. We used to say it when anyone had done something daft, but in a lighthearted way.

Another old favourite is 'crosspatch' as in 'don't be a crosspatch' when someone is being -well - cross.

[DameEdnasBridesmaid]

My mother uses almost all of the above.

Job's comforter is another one of hers.

Feeling as old 'as Methusalah'

[GigiDarcy]

I am rather fond of 'it swings in roundabouts,' said it to my class once to utter incomprehension! My DM used to say 'come on you 3, form 4s' no idea where that comes from! Used to being called a daft ha'porth too. I call my class waffles, doughnuts and heffalumps!

[DawnOfTheDee]

Lovecat - do our families must know each other. YY to wreck of the hesparus, mithering and jammy arabs. I also got 'you're like a wandering jew' if i was drifting around aimlessly

A lot of my friends never got these at home....I think because my dad was a bit older than most.

[DawnOfTheDee]

Ratbag! kirjava

I love this thread

[catinboots]

I only learned quite recently on here that an 'apeth' wasn't a little ape

[Jacksterbear]

I have never heard "jammy Arab" but used to hear "cheeky Arab" a lot.

[mignonnette]

My Grand Father said 'Daft Apeth' and 'mardy'.

Loved them and miss him every time I hear these sayings.

[Jacksterbear]

catinboots I always assumed an apeth was a big ape .

[Reprint]

"stop standing there like piffy on a rockbun" and "I was standing there like piffy on a rockbun"

I never knew what piffy was! or why they would stand on a rockbun in the first place!!
Interestingly, I heard it from a stranger (at a party) early this year and asked if they had any idea of the origins.Nope!!

So if anyone does happen to know...... I'm standing here eagerly anticipating an answer, like piffy on the proverbial

[vladthedisorganised]

Daft ha'porth is a favourite here too.

Other archaic phrases I seem to use more and more:
Mardy gowk
Face like a wet weekend
All fur coat and no knickers
Describing someone as 'soor-faced' - either DD in a sulk or a miserable adult.

I love the description of someone as 'a long drink of water' - fairly dull and a bit of a drip

[AnkaretLestrange]

I only found out relatively recently that the Hesperus was a boat.

[DawnOfTheDee]

Reprint I presume it means the same as 'standing there like a spare part'. Have no clue what a piffy or a rockbun actually is though!

Reminds me of 'ooh you're neither use nor ornament'.

Oh and if you were blocking the idiot box (telly) or something you'd get 'you weren't born in St Helens, were you?' bellowed at you. A reference to the glass making industry there.

[HaroldLloyd]

Something knocks something into a cocked hat. Love that one.

My mum rolls her eyes and says pop thinks he's as flashy as a bonne marche shirt. Which was a shop considered very swishy in her day.

Or if someone runs about a bit rolls her eyes and says ooooo he's like a whirling dervish. I had to google that a while back and I think it's a crazy Turkish dance.

[HaroldLloyd]

We used to say you think your chocolate but your poo in school.

So if someone is full of themselves still say he thinks he's chocolate.

[vladthedisorganised]

Ooh Dawn that's interesting: I got 'you make a better door than a window' if blocking the TV. "Were you born in a barn?" was used if you left a door open.

Standing like a spare part sounds like a polite version of 'standing like a fart in a trance' which I love!

[Yamyoid]

reprint you've reminded me, my mum used to say 'you're standing there like piffy' but my memory tells me she said miffy. I think that's my childhood brain turning it into a character I knew!

[stubbornstains]

Yes, my dad used to say "daft ha'porth" a lot, which I also took to mean a kind of ape . He also used to say "thick as a docker's sandwich" or "thick as two short planks". (He's still around by the way, but it seems he's forgotten all his London slang over the years).

Grandma used to call me "the wreck of the Hesperus" and the "Wild woman of Wonga" a lot, especially during the years I had dreads.

Another Londonism that I heard when I lived there was "Leave it for the sweep" if you drop a coin on the ground. I thought that was quite sweet.

[rabbitlady]

my cousins would 'skrike'. i never did that. at home, we cried.
i know daft apeth/ha'porth/rum 'un/chop him up for firewood/ginnel/ mither.
the ex husband was frequently told by his mum 'you've a face that only a mother could love', which he felt was affectionate.
what are your soft, circular bread rolls called? ours were teacakes. rougher-bread ones were muffins, muffins were harder and flatter, chewy things good hot with butter and jam. sometimes we heard them called baps or barm cakes.

[Nishky]

visited my 83 year old aunt yesterday and when talking about someone she worked with she said ' he had a bob on himself'

my children were very

[BlackStiltonBoots]

I also thought it was daft apeth (an apeth being an overgrown ape in my mind), was disappointed when I found out what it really was.

I call DC little ratbags all the time sometimes.

One that used to make me laugh was my Grandad saying he was so hungry he could eat a scabby donkey between two slabs of concrete .

[stubbornstains]

They used to call street urchins "street arabs" didn't they MrsDV ?

[funnyossity]

My Mum and Gran always used "wreck of the Hesperus" and when I asked what the Hesperus was they said they really didn't know but it must have been in a hell of a state!

Am liking piffy on a rockbun.