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Original poster

To be miffed at "Gift list for mother of the baby" enclosed in *Baby naming ceremony* invitation?

992 replies

doubleshotespresso · 12/06/2013 23:38

So some close friends (who married in church), but now claim to be atheist are holding a naming ceremony for their 8 month old first baby in an hotel.....

The invitation is beautiful with a map, timings "event closes at 11pm"?

The gift list ranges from £30-to £300, all items for the mother, cosmetics, trinkets, jewellery, pampering breaks, personalised hand-bound stationery and photo albums...

Anybody know the drill for these naming ceremonies? Are we supposed to guess a gift for the baby? Or just congratulate the mother for deciding on a name?

I have read this a dozen times and am staggered beyond belief-DP read it and fell into hysterics....

My gut tells me to go along with Jo Malone scented nappies or something.

Somebody please tell me this is not normal?!?!?!

OP posts:
Lavenderhoney · 13/06/2013 21:31

Hopefully its massive mistake. Maybe:)

I was invited to a super smart wedding once, and the present table was groaning with luxury gifts ( luxury labels, tiffany etc) I was wondering where to hide my inferior present whilst gazing out of the window across the parkland when a man slinked in, looked furtively about and snatched off a label AND TIED HIS OWN ON!!

I coughed:) and he jumped a mile, and ran! He didn't even look round!

There's a thought:)

Mia4 · 13/06/2013 21:33

is confused The baby is 8 months, doesn't it have a name???

nauticant · 13/06/2013 21:36

Actually, this does make sense and there is precedent. Matthew 2:11:

"gold, and frankincense, and myrrh"

No way were those gifts for the baby.

Bogeyface · 13/06/2013 21:42

You're right nauticant, Mary was straight down to cash converters with those bad boys! I bet cash4gold had a field day too :o

Smartiepants79 · 13/06/2013 21:52

My god, missed a trick when my DD1 was christened. Will start compiling a list for when DD2 is christened later in the year.....
But seriously I have never heard of anything so rude and greedy.
Words fail me.
I would go, have lots of food and then leave a small but lovely gift for the BABY!

Bogeyface · 13/06/2013 21:55

Joking aside, OP is it possible that it is a misguided but well meaning surprise from her DH?

I know one very devoted couple and he is the sort who would do something like this and then be totally non plussed when it is pointed out to him how inappropriate it is. He arranged a stripper for his DW2B because he thought it would be a nice thing to do, and totally didnt get that it was creepy and just plain wrong! Her MOH cancelled it, not least because her hen was in a Spa :o

I wish the stripper had gone actually, cos the hen was the most fecking boring day of my life!

Bogeyface · 13/06/2013 21:55

Sorry, he arranged a stripper for her hen do, wasnt a random thing!

CheapBread · 13/06/2013 22:08

Ask them if it's a joke. Don't go along with it and let this behaviour catch on!

Snazzywaitingforsummer · 13/06/2013 22:46

I don't think the OP should lower herself to the level of crassness that the hosts here have shown. Take it at face value, just don't feel you have to conform to their present giving requirements - but you can still be polite about it.

Jan49 · 13/06/2013 22:50

Is it a separate list from the invitation? Maybe when you could mention it to her you could pretend you don't know why this is in there as it's a list of gifts for her, maybe a birthday list? And look baffled.

pleiadianpony · 13/06/2013 22:56

Fucking Hell!!! The Audacity. By them a copy of 'The Non-Materialistic parent' or 'a child's guide to breaking free of greedy selfish parents' or something like that. What absolute a Poor child.

BOF · 13/06/2013 23:09

I like Jan49's suggestion. That's a good way to start the conversation too.

LadyHarrietdeSpook · 13/06/2013 23:14

Nauticant's post is one of my faves ever...

BOF · 13/06/2013 23:18

Grin Yes, it was an excellent point.

Original poster
doubleshotespresso · 13/06/2013 23:45

These responses are keeping me sane, I just showed DP this thread and he was crying with laughter. He thinks we should go and update MN via videolink! I discovered this evening that the father of this baby has not even seen the invitations!!!!!

nauticant/Bogeyface Brilliant-just brilliant!

Lavenderhoney the list features LOTS of labels, all of them what I would call high-end brands and very expensive..... I did not know some f te items even existed....

This is going to be quite an education I think. If we go......

OP posts:
foslady · 13/06/2013 23:48

OMG - the babies father hasn't got a clue????????

Wow - that's going to make an interesting conversation..............

Bogeyface · 13/06/2013 23:52

Another serious note. I think you should bite the bullet with your friends and tell them that you are not buying for mummy and just for the baby. Think how they would feel if 75% of you bought for the baby and the other 25% followed the list because they werent aware it wasnt "cricket" perhaps not being parents themselves, a bit foolish and ripped off I think.

Bogeyface · 13/06/2013 23:53

Could your DH mention it to the father and let him deal with it? Or is he the type to say "Oh well if thats what X wants...."?

Original poster
doubleshotespresso · 13/06/2013 23:57

www.smythson.com/currency-case-15.html

Link above for a leather "currency case" from Smythson of Bond Street....
Her preferred monogramming choices are detailed above the link (which of course costs more!)

This is the first time I have reallynstudied the list and its detail. Somebody put some serious work into this. I do not think this was put together by her.... She is not very geeky and this is is very slick, though sooooo cheeky too!

OP posts:
wharrgarbl · 14/06/2013 00:00

She has a sister who moved a few years ago to Australia and one friend believes the suggestion may have come from there.

Oh hell no it bloody well did not. I've never seen this before, and lived in Australia for my first 42 years.

BOF · 14/06/2013 00:03

If the father doesn't know, and she didn't do it, just who do you think did? Confused

mosuzu · 14/06/2013 00:03

WTAF at the currency case, madness, she can't actually be serious. Does she even know about this list? It just seems too weird as though someone is playing a prank.

Original poster
doubleshotespresso · 14/06/2013 00:04

bogeyface my initial shock turned to dismay when I first opened this as I was until then genuinely pleased with the gifts I already purchased for the baby.... Thought they were unique, original and fun and would be lovely keepsakes. Now I think I am punching way above my weight.....

DP and father had an email exchange today and the general gist was that he has basically given my friend (mother of baby) a budget and told her to get on with it ( was same for the wedding which I assisted with happily)..... I doubt DP will want to raise the issue. Due to mutual arrangements involving our kids schools, activities, social stuff etc, I see the mother very frequently so I guess am better placed to bring the conversation round to the subject. I feel I have to- it is all so weird. The other two Mums' I spoke to this afternoon were horrified and completely surprised.....

OP posts:
BOF · 14/06/2013 00:05

Clickable link to the currency case (isn't that just a wallet). I'm utterly gobsmacked.

BOF · 14/06/2013 00:07

Either it is somebody else behind it all, or she's having some kind of nervous breakdown.