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Original poster

Omg such anality from pil. Come and share your anal behaviour stories (lighthearted)

911 replies

ledkr · 05/01/2013 11:04

We are with pil at present and they are very sweet but so bloody uptight about everything.
Bil has been away for a week so he left car with pil so that it "wasn't left in the street" it has a steering lock on and fil takes it for a drive each day! The car is an old banger worth about two hundred quid.
Kids can't even eat a banana without a table cloth,mat and plate Hmm
Leaving the house to walk to shops is a major ordeal. Costs hats gloves change of shoes everything switched off at the wall last minute run upstairs for wallets. I could have been there and back.
So I'm asking you to entertain me with similar stories to help me through the day.

OP posts:
smornintime · 07/01/2013 11:06

In the bottom..of the basket, obv

JuliaScurr · 07/01/2013 11:21

can't remember whose ils had special arse flannels, but if you're looking for birthday/Xmas/barmitzvah gifts - this is for you

zapotek · 07/01/2013 11:22

"I think it starts with obsessive tea drinking. I drink loads and only use certain tea bags and it has to be made a certain way strong with little milk or I literally can't drink it. Ds gets stroppy cos I just can't drink his mugs of beige luke warm slop. The tea bag doesn't work properly when it's not hot enough fgs. "

I agree I am a total fascist when it comes to making tea. I can only drink it out of white mugs. Tea looks totally wrong in a black or red mug. Water has to be freshly dawn. Water has to be boiling. I have to use the kettle at work rather than the hot water boiler. i can't stand it when DH boils the kettle to make a cuppa and then wanders off. As soon as it's boiling you have to make it ( although some say this scalds the tea).

My friend makes tea by putting milk and teabag in mug and pouring on the water. This is so wrong.

Tea has to be fairly (don't just show the water the teabag) but with a good amount f milk to take the bitterness off. It cannot be stewed.

zapotek · 07/01/2013 11:23

Tea has to be fairly strong

JuliaScurr · 07/01/2013 11:31

with you right there on making tea.
WE ARE RIGHT. OH YES.
feel a bit queasy remembering uncle putting tea bag AND MILK in mug and WANDERING when kettle boils.
IT IS WRONG.
they must be made to understand.

Trills · 07/01/2013 11:32

Tea doesn't have to be anything, but it is polite to make tea for other people the way they like it, not the way you like it in an attempt to convince the of the error of their ways.

You won't convince them that your tea is better. You will just convince them that you don't know how to make tea.

zapotek · 07/01/2013 11:53

Well obviously I do ask my guests if they like a lot or little milk or strong or weak but I WILL not por hot water onto milk and teabag.

I did live with this friend in a shared house and apparently I did make the best tea- so nerr! Grin

darksideofthemooncup · 07/01/2013 11:55

My MIL is obsessed with plans, every day has to have a plan and she will question me endlessly about what my plan is for the next day. Oh and roasting meat is a minefield, we all have to have a sit down and work out the timings on a piece of paper.

Abra1d · 07/01/2013 12:10

This is the best thread ever! I have laughed so much.

But, ahem, the shower drying family members do have a point. Where we live, with single glazing and hard watere, not squeegying and airing results in water streaks, condensation and mould.

DollyTwat · 07/01/2013 12:32

Holly my dad still lives in the house he was born in so there are YEARS of stuff he's saved in case

He also walks me around his garden 'introducing' me to every plant
He has also traced our family back several hundre years, which means very lengthy phone calls that start in an excited fashion 'do you remember I was looking for Mary? Well I think I've found her. She was married to John who had been married to her sister ...'
This is the point at which I fake crying children upstairs

LondonMother · 07/01/2013 12:37

I think the water-saving people might have a point too, especially if they have a water meter. We don't but I understand it can triple the water bill if you do.

As for the thread, as somebody said hundreds of posts ago, this is the thread that keeps on giving - just fabulous!

TheSkiingGardener · 07/01/2013 12:37

I love this thread but thought I had nothing to contribute. Then I remembered the soup.

Soup cannot, under any circumstances, be warmed up in the microwave. It has to go in a saucepan. If presented with soup that has been microwaved DM will peer at it suspiciously while her mouth makes a perfectly puckered O shape.

And while I'm at it DF is an idiot. He brought me up to be able to fix anything and everything. However, when I ask for help with a job because it takes 2 people, he will turn up with tools and will have bought spare parts for the job he actually thinks I will need doing, because as a female I am inept and WILL be wrong about anything to do with my own house. Gah.

EggRules · 07/01/2013 12:56

I supposed to be working from home.

Instead I have sorted the dryer contents into piles according to the order I intend to iron them:

DS T- shirts, long sleeved tops, jeans

ME: nice tops, work trousers, rest
DH: fluff and fold

I tried to leave things in one pile and sort as they are ironed. Can't.

SilkStalkings · 07/01/2013 12:58

My ILs always buy birthday cards wih the exact relationship on it eg Happy birthday daughter in law. DH's usually is a teenage boy Son one.

LondonMother · 07/01/2013 12:59

Oh gosh, yes. 'To A Special Son-In-Law'. Odd how you never see cards for an ordinary one.

MagicWinkle · 07/01/2013 13:09

My Uncle has a special grater for grating the little silvers of soap that get too annoying to use. He dries them out, saves them up and sets aside a wet afternoon to form them back into weird coloured fall-apart-as-soon-as-you-touch-them bars of reconstitued soap. I think this is a brilliant.

HarkTheHattifattnerSing · 07/01/2013 13:09

do they put special cards from special people on the mantle? My PIL get quite uptight if they dont have a special glizy "Mum and Dad" card from us every Xmas. ANd Birthday. Always proudly displayed with special family cards. We make sure ours is a really rude one for all to see. [evil grin]

SHortly after DS2 was born, he became very very ill and we spent Christmas in PICU. That year they were very miffed that we had not bought them a special card. STrangely, we had other things on our mind.

Original poster
ledkr · 07/01/2013 13:25

Oh hark! Mine do that. It's ridiculous bollox IMO. Who actually cares? There's always mum and dad cards on the shelf alongside our homemade one!
I'm glad we don't live near they are literally in and out if each others houses constantly. On Friday the phone rings continuously with the plans for the weekend. I feel so sorry for the partners of bil and sil as they are vilified for not attending every get together or have their homes invaded all weekend.

OP posts:
LunaticFringe · 07/01/2013 13:49

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Saltire · 07/01/2013 13:58

I have done bugger all today except sit and read this threadGrin. The dog keeps looking pleadingly at me.

My Mum and Sted dad and Ils aren't too bad.
MIL does have a habit of buying wierd/odd/downright unsuitable presents. (remember the duchess of cambridge in her wedding dress figurine I got)
She buys from Scotts of stowe, or QVC. Or some otehr catalogue thing.
Always crap and palms it off onto us.

My mum is a worrier. it takes approx 2.5 hours to get from our house to hers. We don't now text when we are leaving as there will invariable be a text or a phone call from Sdad wanting to know where we are as 2.5 hours passed 20 minutes ago". if I say we stopped for a pee, we have to tell him where, so he can look it up on the map and see where exactly it is. Or on the occasions when we were halfway up A1 and I realised I hadn't said we were leaving, when we arrived - they thought early- there was a lecture given to Dh about his precious (me and DSes) cargo and he was obviously driving recklessly.
Or the time I was PG with DS1 and we went out for a meal. Only we hadn't run it past my mother first, so she'd rang the house (according to her 20 times, according to Sdad it was every 5 minutes for 3 hours). Of course we were late back, so went straight to bed, only to be woken at sparrows fart by people from DHs work - the RAF base - who had been rung up by my mother god knows where she'd got the number from -a nd aksed to send someone round to check that I wasn't in labour and at hospital, or worse that we weren't both dead. and they did, they actually came round at aobut 7am to check on us. DH was furious with her but she trotted out the old "well I was worried"Then i got a lecture about what did I think I was doing eating chinese food when I was pregnant.
WTF did she think chinese women eat when they are rpegnant- egg and chips?

If we are out and she phones she doesn't think oh they are out, not that would be too easy, so she rings approx every 10 minutes (our landline tell the time of each call) and then we get a text to my mobile asking where we are. Of course if this isn't answered straight away then obviously we all dead. So she tired to ring the mobile, jus tin case one of us isn't dead and can asnwer it. By this point she is crying, "where are you".
"OUT" won't suffice either, it has to be a detailed description (so Sdad can look it up on map)

dottyaboutstripes · 07/01/2013 14:32

Anyone else's mother get dressed up to go to see the GP? GP is GOD and must never be questioned nor doubted!

HazleNutt · 07/01/2013 14:55

Not only GP - my FIL is of the opinion that for example notary is a very, very important person. He was waiting and waiting for some inheritance papers a notary was supposed to send and complaining to us every week that he still hasn't received them. When we asked if he has actually called and asked, he was terrified - Nooooo, you can't just call a notary!