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Omg such anality from pil. Come and share your anal behaviour stories (lighthearted)

911 replies

ledkr · 05/01/2013 11:04

We are with pil at present and they are very sweet but so bloody uptight about everything.
Bil has been away for a week so he left car with pil so that it "wasn't left in the street" it has a steering lock on and fil takes it for a drive each day! The car is an old banger worth about two hundred quid.
Kids can't even eat a banana without a table cloth,mat and plate Hmm
Leaving the house to walk to shops is a major ordeal. Costs hats gloves change of shoes everything switched off at the wall last minute run upstairs for wallets. I could have been there and back.
So I'm asking you to entertain me with similar stories to help me through the day.

OP posts:
TwinkleReturns · 06/01/2013 14:17

Love this thread Grin

My Nana was def one of these. For starters she kept everything in the box and packaging that it came in. So hoovering or ironing involved a lengthy exercise of hauling the boxed item out of its cupboard, taking it out the box, unwrapping it etc before wiping it down after use and repacking it.

She insisted on "filling the bin" the day before collection which usually meant that she would be out in the garden hacking bits of tree down specifically for the purpose of filling the bin. It had to be plant material though, no other rubbish could be found to "fill the bin".

She used to wait for the postman to come and then stalk him up the road picking up the elastic bands that he dropped. These would go into a special jar for postman elsatic bands, which must be kept segregated from "bought" elastic bands.

She had a special jar for those straws that you get on orange juice cartons. The juice could never be consumed straight from the carton Shock; the corner must be neatly snipped with the carton snipping scissors and the juice poured into a glass of exactly the right size. The straws were placed in the jar and never used.

Envelopes were cut up into small squares onto which she would write in tiny handwriting her weekly shopping list. She would shop in the order that the items were listed so would often pick up carrots, then march to the other end of the store to get lemonade and then all the way back to the veg aisle for potatoes. She would never deviate from the list incase she missed something.

And she kept everything. She had tins for all manner of random bits - buttons, packets, bags, string. If you mentioned needing to buy something be it glue, knickers or food item she wou;d always say "Ahh hang on" and disappear only to return half an hour later with whatever it was you needed, always in a little plastic bag and looking like it had been lurking in a cupboard for a good ten years!

There are hundreds more but Id be here all day! Lovely woman though, I do miss her Smile

breatheslowly · 06/01/2013 14:30

My PIL, who are normal and lovely in almost every way, have an obsession with food going cold before you eat it. I assume it comes from living in cold, drafty houses without central heating - but seems to have lingered, even though their house and our house are both perfectly warm.

This was most obvious the day we suggested getting a Chinese takeaway at their house. MIL tends to cook faffy 2-3 course meals with a lot of effort and apologising for things she isn't totally happy with. We though a takeaway would give her a break. When the takeaway arrived in the house the plates had to be put in a sink of hot water to warm up. Then both PIL set about trying to find the plug in hot plate thing (not sure what it is called) for the takeaway cartons to sit on. This was found after about 10-15 min of hunting and plugged in to warm up. Eventually we sat down to eat, the food having cooled a little in the process. This all struck me as completely pointless as I really don't mind if my food has cooled a little and takeaway barely hits my plate before being eaten.

They have always been very polite and never mentioned that we don't warm plates in our house. I am sure it grates.

SPBInDisguise · 06/01/2013 14:35

No early 60s is not old! FIL who is in his early 60s has just done the coast to coast walk.
Whereas when I was a child I'm sure early 60s was getting on a bit, and if you were in your 70s you were a little old man/lady. How times change.

SPBInDisguise · 06/01/2013 14:36

Oh yes we don't warm plates/ I'm sure both sets of parents think us savages but are too polite to mention. The food's hot, and I eat quick Blush

bluer · 06/01/2013 14:42

My lovely dad and my step mum insist on cremating absolutely everything they cook. Got a nice piece of beef? Well we'll cook it till its grey and chewy. Chicken? Packet instruction plus at least an hour...at a much higher oven temp. I nearly threw the entire tray of homemade roast potatoes at one xmas dinner my dad had the cheek to tell me that aunt Bessies didn't take as long.
I really think they have no taste buds!

EggRules · 06/01/2013 14:43

DM and Dmil both buy clothes way too small for DS. They provide a gift receipt, the actual receipt Confused, hanger and carrier bag. All four are provided to me with the gift wrapped outfit so that [the lady of the house] can make the necessary change. Alternatively, they could buy the size we talked about when they made a special call when in the shop.

EggRules · 06/01/2013 14:48

I am another savage that doesn't normally warm plates. Early-elderlies warm plates if they are mixing hot and cold, like chicken and salad.

JuliaScurr · 06/01/2013 14:56

there must be some explanation for dh's endless faff with food every time one particular set of friends visit. They're very strict with their kids re biscuits, crisps etc, so it is TORTURE for me (disabled) trying to subtly get dh to get the sodding pasta on/make a variety of sandwiches, no need to ask everyone exactly what filling they want - ffs, the kids are virtually crying with hunger, their parents won't let them have eg toast before dinner even though nobody has any real idea when the buggering dinner will be ready.
he's lovely sometimes.
apart from thecrap time management
inappropriate napping
low libido
Smile

LapsedPacifist · 06/01/2013 15:36

Oldies warm plates because they eat very slowly, due to chewing each mouthful 20 times having sore teeth and gums and uncomfortable dental plates and appliances, and the food goes cold before they've finished if served up on an unheated plate.

Used to drive me CRAZY - I would spend ages cooking a delicious meal for Aged Mama, then as soon as I announced I was dishing up, she'd insist on putting the plates in the oven for 10 minutes first (or that bonkers thing of boiling up a kettle and plunging the plates into hot water) so the food would go cold/dry out.

Then she discovered the joy of MICROWAVES! She usually heats up her food 2 or 3 times during the course of a meal now, but at least we're spared the heating the plates thing!

LapsedPacifist · 06/01/2013 15:52

Re. age is all in the mind: I'm in my early 50s and an undergraduate who has just passed their driving test! Blush . Gosh, I'll be losing my virginity next! Grin

DS (16) has mild Asperger's, and tends towards the fogeyish, so I make him sit with me and watch 'Inbetweeners' and 'Fresh Meat' on telly (to introduce him to the mysteries of 'teen culture') which we then solemnly discuss from an anthropological perspective. Aged Mama (84) often joins us - I make sure she has a pad on because she laughs so much she wees herself - it acts as a wonderful tonic for her. Her humour has become rather scatalogical in old age Hmm.

OTOH, DH (with mild OCD) is the worst worrywart in the world for checking everything 90 times before we leave the house, and is a very anxious traveller. It makes going abroad on holiday almost unbearably stressful, so we don't do it very often Sad.

So I guess old age IS in the mind!

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 06/01/2013 15:56

My dad has a wordprocessed shopping list, typed up from the one he wrote walking round Tescos, so that everything's written in the order you'd find it in the shop.

Each week he edits out the stuff they don't need, and prints the shopping list.

Oh God, Euphemia - is it bad that I read this and thought 'what a good idea'??

My parents have done some of the things on this thread - very out of date food, changing the sheets each week, with the top sheet becoming the bottom one, and the bottom one going to the wash, set days to do things, set times for things (I once suggested making a cup of coffee at 8.50pm, instead of waiting until 9pm, and was told in shocked tones that it was 'too early'), and they had to watch the news and weather at 6pm and 9pm every day.

I think it must be catching - I watch the 6 o clock news each night now, and have even been known to record it if I was going to miss it. I'm on the slippery slope, aren't I?

ihatethecold · 06/01/2013 16:05

love this thread, just marking my place so i can read later when home from work Grin

LindyHemming · 06/01/2013 16:06

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

2anddone · 06/01/2013 16:07

Oh god I am crying with laughter reading this then it hit me....
I have multiple Tupperware for opened packets of food!
I write out all the travel info before I go away!
I write my shopping list then rewrite according to order it is in the shop!
I get mine and my dc clothes out the night before!
I shout at Doris (my sat nav!)
I am on the slippery slope and I am 34 Blush Grin

2anddone · 06/01/2013 16:08

Do serve gravy in my measuring jug though so there might be hope yet Wink

Tee2072 · 06/01/2013 16:11

Is the shopping list thing okay if it's on your Smartphone using an app? Blush

And I actually own two gravy boats.

And lots of tupperware. Which are in two different cupboards, the use daily tupperware cupboard and the use on holidays, such as Christmas, cupboard.

And I'm not quite 44...

Shesparkles · 06/01/2013 16:13

Best. Thread. Ever! Grin

BuiltForComfort · 06/01/2013 16:24

My lovely DPs -

Going deaf but refuse to admit (& get cross with each other because of both mishearing) - tick.

Mum being driven everywhere by Dad despite owning her own car - tick.

Strange rituals regarding the drying / airing / ironing of clothes (& tense hovering in background should I attempt to wash & dry any of my clothes my own way when visiting them) - tick.

Inability to cook in my kitchen though perfectly capable at home (DM) - tick.

Much discussion of route / traffic etc despite route not having changed in 20 years (DF) - tick.

However they run their dishwasher about 3 times a day, sometimes only with 2 cups, saucers (never mugs), small plates and knives from breakfast. Despite having cupboards full of crockery etc the same 2-4 plates etc will be used over and over and over.

They are fab and I am sad that they are setting to get old now.

EndoplasmicReticulum · 06/01/2013 16:32

My mum is another warm-plate obsessive. In her house she "warms" them in the oven with the food, so we have to warn small children of the danger of burning.

If we eat out, the first thing she does is touch the plate, and then tut.

stifnstav · 06/01/2013 16:34

Oh good lord. I am elderly!

I have a cheese box.
I put leftover boiled water in a flask.
If you wash up, the not quite hot water is collected in a jug to fill the kettle.
I have a system for bedding storage.
I save the salt packets from KFC. No fucking clue why cos I never add salt to anything.
I have a button box.
I have a ribbon box.
I have a wrapping paper box.
I have a greetings card box.
I have a gift bag box.
I have a "miscellaneous packaging that might be useful when I sell something on ebay" box.
I save leftovers for soup.
I have a "this isn't Blackpool Illuminations" lightswitch policy.
I have a shelf just for gifts with an accompanying spreadsheet (just look at the fucking shelf, woman!)
I have different bank accounts for different expenditure, including a gifts account! Oh ffs!
I am currently waiting for my new car-seat tidy to arrive, having already decided what I will store in it.

But despite this, people think I am a really messy cow! I fear I may be Monica Geller and people can only see the "messy cupboard" side to me.

I have just turned 32. I am One Of Them.The

postmanpatscat · 06/01/2013 16:37

My own parents are in their late 60s but reassuringly laid back and normal, apart from dad's mild OCD which I have inherited , but I have to wonder why my parents, inlaws and several older generation couples I know SHARE an email address like there are not enough to go round!

LaQueen · 06/01/2013 16:38

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

FellatioNelson · 06/01/2013 16:43

My DH is like that with the loo when we are going out LaQ. It doesn't matter how much notice he's had that we are going out, he always needs to go to the loo and stay there for never less than 20 minutes, at the very point that everyone is ready to leave the house.

LaQueen · 06/01/2013 16:44

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

NorbertDentressangle · 06/01/2013 16:44

Love this thread!

FIL is Mr Anal. When we're staying at their house I love checking my emails on the computer in his home office as I get endless fun looking at the box files -they date back years and are jammed with useless paperwork. For example they'll have a file labelled Holidays 2002 and it will be full of copies of their ferry and travel itinerary, any emails sent/received about accommodation etc from 10 years ago!!!!

On our last visit there was letter on his desk from their GP surgery reminding them about making an appt. for their flu jabs. He'd diligently written on the date they received the letter, the date he'd phoned to make an appt and the date/time of the appt. The letter was waiting to be filed in the Health 2012 file no doubt.

If you ask him something like "when you're next on the computer could you just check what the weather forecast is for tomorrow please" he'll later appear with pages of print outs from various weather sites. Everything is printed out (often in duplicate no doubt). he must be solely responsible for the deforestation of some small country somewhere.

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