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Original poster

Omg such anality from pil. Come and share your anal behaviour stories (lighthearted)

911 replies

ledkr · 05/01/2013 11:04

We are with pil at present and they are very sweet but so bloody uptight about everything.
Bil has been away for a week so he left car with pil so that it "wasn't left in the street" it has a steering lock on and fil takes it for a drive each day! The car is an old banger worth about two hundred quid.
Kids can't even eat a banana without a table cloth,mat and plate Hmm
Leaving the house to walk to shops is a major ordeal. Costs hats gloves change of shoes everything switched off at the wall last minute run upstairs for wallets. I could have been there and back.
So I'm asking you to entertain me with similar stories to help me through the day.

OP posts:
bbface · 05/01/2013 19:50

More than three years ago my FIL came to stay.

He mislaid a sock whilst here.

He continues to ask me if I have found his sock. Three. Years. Ago.

GoldPlatedNineDoors · 05/01/2013 19:51

Oh dear, and we all get to turn into them.

ChippingInLovesChristmasLights · 05/01/2013 19:52

Well - I am relieved on two levels and worried on another.

I am relieved that I am not alone in my suffering Xmas Grin

I am relieved that my pelvic floor is still doing it's job well Xmas Grin

I am worried that one day I will be the subject of a thread like this Xmas Grin

Please, keep them coming!!

Original poster
ledkr · 05/01/2013 19:52

My parents leave their cups out for drinks in the morning with tea bags in ready and spoons too.
They do various supermarket trips a week and eat similar meals each day. Chops Friday steak Saturday and roast Sunday with meat sarnies for tea.
I told her I called her one morning And she snapped "we were in asda . You know we go to asda on Thursday morning"
Before they or we drive anywhere we have to discuss traffic and where we will park when we get there.
If any of us get a parking ticket or stuck in a jan we have to keep quiet for fear of much head shaking and smug disbelief.
Also oil and water should be checked daily Hmm

OP posts:
ChippingInLovesChristmasLights · 05/01/2013 19:53

GPND - you have permission to shoot me if I do!

JellicleCat · 05/01/2013 19:56

MIL has the thing about airing clothes. They go out on the line for 10 minutes a short while and are brought in practically dripping to "air". Why not leave them blowing on the line (in the actual air) until they are dry? Confused

FellatioNelson · 05/01/2013 19:57

My SIL once brought a small cake tin to my house to make her cheesecake in, as a Christmas offering. It was one of those thin non-stick victoria sandwich type tins that cost about a fiver. When she was ready to go home she couldn't find her cake tin - I think MIL had washed up and put it away in one of my cupboards or something.

OMG the fuss that was made of finding this fucking cake tin. Shock My bin was practically emptied out on to the floor, both my fridges given a thorough going over, my cupboards and dishwasher frisked, I'm sure I was given an internal body-search at some point. Thank God she found it in the end otherwise I fear the police may have been called.

ipswichwitch · 05/01/2013 19:58

eggeules my parents have a post-shower tile drying protocol! You also have to dry the edge of the bath, the floor, the towel rail (all with special towel) then arrange all the towels on the towel rail correctly so nobody (god forbid) should use tile drying towel to dry their hands. In case of tile contamination, presumably Confused

tiffinbaker · 05/01/2013 19:59

I love this thread, I've just read it all the way through.

I have lovely lovely inlaws who are only a teeny tiny bit mad. In this thread I can see how much more so they could be, they are practically normal by comparrison.

I think they would like to be like the other ILs on this thread, but don't quite have enough bossiness to make it work. So they try to stick to their regular mealtimes and plan their schedules in advance when we are visiting, but have given up trying to get us to eat at 6 or specify our sandwich contents in advance. They do insist on us looking at the takeaway menu at 3pm if we are having curry though. Because they need to place the order in plenty of time.

LindyHemming · 05/01/2013 20:01

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

3birthdaybunnies · 05/01/2013 20:03

Unfortunately my own flesh and blood, my parents have a date on their calendar when one of them turns on their PAYG mobile in the kitchen, and rings the other one in the hall to make sure that they don't lose their mobile number.

My FIL has too many obessions/routines to list!

Oodhousekeeping · 05/01/2013 20:05

My grandparents used to do the eating at set times thing. I used to go for lunch from school sometimes so I could use my dinner money for sweets and used to get there 12:15 and mine would be plated up as Grandad ate at 12 on the dot!

My mum does the travel itinery thing. Even if she leaves my Dad at home I get it though dad is a bit scatterbrained

My BIL/SIL change clothes 7 or 8 times a day. Pjs, house clothes, dog walking clothes, house clothes, work clothes, house clothes , going out clothes etc... Dh warned me before I stayed with them but I spent the whole weekend soooo frustrated waiting to go out.

HyvaPaiva · 05/01/2013 20:05

Allalonenow, don't worry it's not the itinerary itself that makes me laugh and I see why you might leave contact information. The Grin is for the way it is written and the overboard detailing ('NB: CRUCIAL'/0600 hours bits/seat numbers/the embassy) that is provided to family members ...about 6 couples received a 'pack' of itinerary, photocopies and documents Grin

LindyHemming · 05/01/2013 20:05

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
ledkr · 05/01/2013 20:05

tiffin I posted earlier about the takeaway panic Grin
One year we had planned to go ice skating from pils. There was so much faffing and I mean hours of discussion indecision peppered with coffee breaks and me trying to get a decision made. I then realised that the ice rink closed at 4 and it was about 2 so I took dd1 and we went ourselves.
I think pil were still like this Shock when we got back. We had also been for pizza do fils head nearly fell off as he had been planning for us to eat an Indian at about 7.22 and we weren't hungry.

OP posts:
timidviper · 05/01/2013 20:07

notmy idea DH records petrol and mileage every time he fills up and thinks I am mad because I laugh at him for it.

It will probably short circuit his brain tomorrow when he doesn't get his bacon and egg brunch because I'm scared I'm going to turn as batty as the rest of his family if i cook one every week

Sparklingbrook · 05/01/2013 20:07

My Dad cannot get his head round buying a take out coffee at all. You make coffee at home, and certainly don't wander round glugging it-that's uncouth apparently.

namechanger11111 · 05/01/2013 20:08

I have. an ex who was like that when he was 28.

He cleaned his house on the same day each week even though it was never dirty, went food shopping on the same day and filled his car up with petrol on the same day.

He had to have bread and butter with every meal no matter what it was.

He never used his debit card to pay for anything, he'd decide the night before how much he'd need to spend then take it out of the cash point. Then he'd phone his mum and she would write down what he'd withdrawn and how much he had left in a little book. Sometimes he'd phone his mum first to make sure he could afford what he was planning to spend.

I stayed at his house one night and the 2 coffee cups we'd used had to be washed, dried and put away and the sink rinsed and dried with a cover over it before we could go to bed.

He lasted 4 weeks before i ran away screaming!

FellatioNelson · 05/01/2013 20:09

YYY! SIL and BIL have a post shower drying protocol as well! When we stayed there recently we found a brand new squeegee scraper thing like window cleaners use, and a brand new chamois leather placed strategically in the shower cubicle of the guest bathroom, just for us. We both took great delight in ignoring them.

Sparklingbrook · 05/01/2013 20:10

At my parents all shower gels, shampoos etc are dried and put into a cupboard after showering. Wink

Agent64 · 05/01/2013 20:13

My dad nearly had a heart attack once because my DDs were baking. Watching them cracking eggs was more stress than he could bear.

Him (covering his eyes with one hand, clutching his chest with the other) - I can't look, oh I can't look.

Me - It's only an egg.

Him - No, I can't take it.

He left. They baked. Yum.

As an aside - I was never allowed to help my mum in the kitchen, never mind being let loose with eggs n flour n stuff.

FellatioNelson · 05/01/2013 20:15

My SIL wipes her oven out after very use.

MulledWineAndScully · 05/01/2013 20:16

When we go visit we have to text when we come off the motorway so they can 'swap the cars around' (this involves parking one car in the street so we can park in the drive). I cannot for the life of me work out why they can't move the car when they feel like it or when a space becomes available in the street, because sometimes it's all too late and all the street places are full.

littlemisssarcastic · 05/01/2013 20:19

SoggySummer Your post at 13.18 has me in stitches!! Grin

My xMIL has been through countless mobile phones and cordless phones by insisting on leaving them permanently on charge. She never allows them to discharge before recharging, just keeps on recharging them. Inevitably, the battery dies and then she wonders why, once again, they haven't lasted, despite everyone explaining to her a thousand times.

I know you can get phones that can be left permanently on charge now, but xMIL refuses to buy any of those which are suggested to her, because she doesn't like the look of them.

Over christmas, both her cordless phone and her mobile batteries have died again. She has had both phones no more than 6 months.

She also plugged all of our phones, laptops and mobiles in when she visited. Grin

craftynclothy · 05/01/2013 20:20

Oh yes, ILs also have a shower drying protocol with a squeegee thingy. I always have a shower immediately before Dh so he has to sort it out. By the flipping time I've done it I need another bloody shower Grin

And making cups of tea. OMG I try to make it while they're not around so I can just stick the bag in a mug. If they're around you have to follow the tea making rules:
Fill kettle with fresh water and boil
Pour water into teapot "to warm the pot"
Empty rest of water down sink, fill kettle with fresh water and boil
Empty water from teapot
Add teabag to tea pot and pour freshly boiled water on
Set oven timer for 3 minutes
When oven beeps, pour into mug and add milk
By the time it's ready I'm wishing I hadn't bothered saying I'd have one, especially as I'm only allwed 'normal' tea or FIL's Earl Grey. MIL won't share her fruit teas with me Confused