Omg such anality from pil. Come and share your anal behaviour stories (lighthearted)

[ledkr]

We are with pil at present and they are very sweet but so bloody uptight about everything.
Bil has been away for a week so he left car with pil so that it "wasn't left in the street" it has a steering lock on and fil takes it for a drive each day! The car is an old banger worth about two hundred quid.
Kids can't even eat a banana without a table cloth,mat and plate
Leaving the house to walk to shops is a major ordeal. Costs hats gloves change of shoes everything switched off at the wall last minute run upstairs for wallets. I could have been there and back.
So I'm asking you to entertain me with similar stories to help me through the day.

my mil is lovely.
she is pretty laid back about a lot of things but is a bit ocd, everything has it's place, the clothes on her porcelain dolls (she collects) are washed and ironed regularly and her house is pristine. she has at least 5 different sets of themed plates and cuttlery for birthdays, christmas, easter...any occasion.

That would drive me freaking nuts TeaOneSugar. Like people who insist you don't need butter on bread if you are having peanut butter. WHY NOT? It's not actually butter is it, you morons? It's called peanut butter but it's not actual butter FFS. What is wrong with these people?

My late Mother (bless her she was lovely) was a bit anal about the house catching fire or being burgled. If she used a chip pan the minute the chips were served it went out on the back step incase it somehow managed to ignite itself while we were having our meal.

Every plug in the house was removed at bedtime - I'm sure she was never really comfortable about having a freezer and needing to leave it plugged in all the time.

At night she used to stuff blutac in the keyhole in the back door. She said this was to stop draughts but I really think it was to stop a burgler with an exact replica of her back door key gaining access. Not sure that the blutac would have worked

Butter with peanut butter?! Bread only needs one source of summat moist. I would definitely raise an eyebrow at a multi-butterer

Oh, my stepmother used to bang on about that one, Fellatio. Drove me batty. Fortunately my father eventually divorced her, which was only right and proper (although I suspect the butter issue may not have actually been cited in the divorce papers).

There is nothing wrong with household items having a place - that makes sense. Everyone knows where it fits and where to find it, saving time and hassle. Fine.

But there is no benefit whatsoever to having stupid uptight routines that involve eating the same foods at the same times in a totally regimented way, that saps all the fun and spontaneity out of life. Urrgh.

Oh no! I make a travel itinerary, but mine is just for fun, natch.

But peanut butter is not moist! It will glue your jaws together! It is probably a good deal less moist than jam, but I bet you have butter with jam? (assuming you like butter at all and if you do not then you are just weird.)

These are hilarious.

My dear Mum does so many of these and since my Dad retired they have both got worse.
Tea HAS to be made in a pot which must be prewarmed with water and only one teabag in teapot.
No to oven chips, they have to be real potatoes cut with a crinkle cutter and be a certain size. She spends ages preparing veg, sprouts must be meticulously chopped at one end, outer leaves removed and a cross on the bottom. Apples have to be peeled as the wax may give you indigestion.
Only Dad can operate the TV and DVD player, he nearly died of shock when ds tried to attach his X Box to it on Xmas Day, he also has a small notebook with everything he has recorded on.
There was a sketch a while back on French & Saunders where Jennifer is a harrried housewife fretting over a meal for a dinner party and getting so stressed that it has to be perfect, reminds me of my Mum

My mum reads full Ts and Cs for every app or programme she downloads. Some of them run to 40pages or something! She usually doesn't get through them so won't download the app.

Butter and peanut butter is indulgently delish. Peanut butter on its own is dry and claggy. I do buy decent whole nut crunchy though, maybe that smooth shite stuff doesn't need butter.

bitsnbobs. I love that sketch so much.

OMG that is so true.

peanut butter and marmite every time.. and definitely butter to avoid a Gobi desert mouth.

not my parents or in-laws, but we once bought a second hand car from an elderly gentleman who kept a notebook in the glove compartment in which he'd recorded every time he'd filled up with petrol, how much it had cost, and the mileage, every journey he'd made in it.
Lovely car though!

We bought a car that had a note selotaped to the indicators saying which way for left and right !

My PILs lay out their breakfast dishes the night before - I think it's quite sweet really .

By god the routines!! My mum and dad have the same meals on the same nights of the week EVERY night except Saturday. Saturday is dad's turn to cook something (which is usually lasagne but is allowed to not be lasagne, just that one night).

I can't go stay on a weekday with DD any more because my dad must watch emmerdale before he commences work in the study. As her bedtime is 7pm and she sleeps in the study he had a total meltdown about it (refused to work first and watch emmerdale later) and she had to sleep in with me. Neither of us slept a bloody wink.

They don't pursue hobbies together any more because it becomes hard work eg. They started going swimming but my dad said they had to do x lengths each and was counting my mums as well as his own and accusing her of lying about how many she'd done.

I'm not sure if this is anal behaviour or controlling behaviour now I'm reading it back. She should probably LTB.

My dp cancelled a long awaited city break in case they caught novovirus whilst away...

Notmyidea - My dad does that. He can't switch the engine back on until it has all been noted and mileage calculated, argh!

felatio you made me properly scared then. We are driving back and I had to stop and think if any of the rellies might be mnetters I have a feeling that sil and bil partners get a bit irritated too.
It took ages to leave as usual. We have to kiss everyone goodbye that we kissed hello four hours previously
Looking forward to getting home and having a nice glass of wine.
Dry January can fuck off.

Sparkling - I like pasta.

It's easy to see myself going down this path though, I think I have a gene, given parents / grandparents and their ways.

Also I think being a teacher doesn't help, I am conditioned to work to a timetable and respond to bells.

cannot make himself a sandwich, and will stand looking pathetic with a piece of bread until MIL comes to spread some butter on it and miraculously turn it into a sarnie through the medium of ham...

This is my most favourite thinng I have ever read on here

dry january can fuck off

Yup. I know that feeling.