Then let's carry on! (and hope Aitch doesn't notice)
This next one makes more sense if you've read the Sharon threads. Actually it only makes sense if you've read the Sharon threads.
SHARONIAN RHAPSODY (by Empress)
Is this the real life?
Is this just fantasy?
Hearing Erasure,
No escape from reality.
Open your eyes, Look down at the wasp and see,
He's just done T-rex, he needs no sympathy
Because he's done the Owl, done the Mole
Done Spiderman, done them all
Any way he stands now doesn't really matter to me, to me
DH just threw the wine
Made a big splash on the wall, missed the carpet, but that's all
Poor wasp, its life had just begun,
But now DH has thrown the wine away.
Adam, ooh, Didn't mean to make you confused,
If the Rainbow videos aren't off this time tomorrow,
Carry on, carry on as if nothing really matters.
Too late, Sharon has come,
Erasure's in her ears, it's the only thing she hears,
Goodbye, everybody, I've got to go,
Gotta pick up truffles and pizza and face the truth,
Bungle, ooh, I don't want to be Zippy,
I sometimes wish I'd never been to Asda at all.
I see a little fruit and veg, Tesco man
Sharon, ooh, Sharon, ooh, will you SWITCH OFF ERASURE.
Wine flying and wasp dying, Mumsnet-mystifying me
(Sharon Sharon). Sharon Sharon. (Sharon Sharon). Sharon Sharon. Sharon Sharon she's a hoor.
(She lives next door). This wall's just painted and now it's all mucky.
It's just a wine-stained wall (but a clean carpet),
The wasp lost its life but how we didn't see.
Rainbow's on, switch it off, will you switch it off.
Bismillah! No, we will not switch it off.
(Switch it off!) Bismillah! We will not switch it off.
(Switch it off!) Bismillah! We will not switch it off.
(Switch it off.) Will not switch it off.
(Switch it off.) Will not switch it off. (Switch it off). Ah.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
(Oh T-rex, T-rex.) Do the T-rex in Asda.
To do Tobey Maguire you have to have the face for it, for it, for it.
So you think you can mess up the wall throwing wine.
So you think you can T-rex and leave wasps to die,
Oh, DH, can't do this to me, DH,
Just gotta get Adam, just gotta get right down to Tesco.
Nothing really matters, as long as I'm not Zippy,
Nothing really matters,
Nothing really matters to me.
Any way Sharon blows.