I'm quite sure I've just done something mad...

[lostinwails]

TMI alert! Have had a very bad tummy bug and am left in a position where venturing more that 30 seconds from the loo would be a foolish risk. I've decided that the water I'm drinking is passing through my body at great speed so in a rash moment I've swallowed a round piece of floaty plastic to time how long it takes to come out. I'm mad aren't I, too long on the sofa with only flat lemonade and salty crisps for company I think.

When you feel less than fantastic
And you eye up small red plastic
Diarrhoea, Diarrhoea

When you pick up lego pieces
To track your runny faeces
Diarrhoea, Diarrhoea

When you wonder does it roll on
In your bowel or in your colon
Diarrhoea, Diarrhoea

When you're looking down the shitter
And wish you'd eaten glitter
Diarrhoea, Diarrhoea

PMSL at that song, I think it will be a while before I play 'pull my finger'.

The 'ring' will be going on my Christmas list!

Mumsnet is the best!

Update, progress is slowing, although I did limit fluids prior to the school run just in case. I fear we may never ever see the lego again. I am really hoping now that in 1,000 years time archaeologists will dig up my corpse and start theories of a 'lego cult' based on the piece entombed in my stomach.

I hope everyone has learnt a vital lesson from this never to eat lego in an amateur attempt to asess colonic transit times.

PD has far too much time on her hands

Maybe you have discovered the cure for Diarrhoea ?

PD you are BRILLIANT

Awesome!

pmsl, hecate and penny, your wee ditties are luverly!

LOL @ Hecate and Penny!

Isn't it out yet??

I hate that song now after that advert :/

I need to know if the lego ever came out!

wow!! how did i miss this?? i have been lurking all day on MN and i MISEED IT??

LIW wow you have made my boring work afternoon HILARIOUS and a classic as well!! WELL DONE!!

Late to the party, I know, but I once swallowed a pound coin (by accident - sorry OP) and it came out a day or so later. But that was normal BMs. And I'm fine. But then a pound coin is less ridgy than a piece of lego, even a round piece of lego.

Still in there unless it was a lot less floaty than I thought and vanished round the u bend early on!

Much MUCH smaller than a pound coin and not ridgy more of a little lid for something to make it smooth than a proper piece of lego (trying so hard to sound rational when even I cannot understand my logic at 11am this morning)

I do promise if I ever spot it though I will come back and let everyone know, even if it is six months time and I have to start a new thread with a ridiculous title just to get your attention. Although I have the sinking feeling a thread title of 'anyone remember that piece of red lego' would probably work quite well.

I AM a loon aren't I.

Even if it means pooing on paper plates and scrutinize the product with plastic knife and fork, at every deposit, until lego piece is out, for our benefit?

Ok, comtessa you are the second person on this thread to mention swallowing a pound coin... HOW does one accidently swallow a pound coin??????

lostinwails, glad to hear things seem to be, um, slowing down. Hope you're better soon, you deserve it after all the joy you've spread across the internet!

Ds2 choked on a piece of plastic from a Mac D drinks lid, it got stuck in his throat. It was a sharp triangular piece from where you pierce the straw. As he could not breathe, and we were driving toward the German border (from Poland), and it was dark, we pulled into a lorry drivers night parking spot, with a bar, and dh ran shouting out into the night
"SOMEBODY CALL AN AMBULANCE OUR CHILD CANT BREATHE HE IS CHOKING". (he was 3)

His little heart was beating so fast, he was so scared. Ds1 was crying with fear, dh had disappeared, and I was left holding poor ds2 not knowing what to do. Luckily the ambulance was quick, and the paramedics tried to get the plastic that was wedged in ds2s throat out with long tweezers. It did not work, so we had to drive after the ambulance to the nearest hospital for x ray and whatever. They gave him a lolly to suck on to calm him down.

This caused the plastic piece to go down into his tummy. We were told to keep an eye on his poo over the next couple of days to make sure it came out, to ensure it did not cause any harm to him internally.

It came out in three pieces the next day. I think the gastric acid must have done a good job on it.

But, that was me, with a paper plate, plastic knife and fork, digging through poo....

hey ho!

I meant to add, for all you know the gastric acids may have dissolved the lego!

Scary story! Your poor little DS... (and you, too!)

No! No pooing on paper plates and examining! Even I have my limits.

Bed soon I think, it's been quite an exhausting day (mostly from laughing at everyone's posts) night all.

I reckon your tummy is going 'what's this - Lego? Isn't this what kids play with. Could try to digest this.... Hmm, it doesn't work. Better keep it a bit longer for a proper examination'.

I was climbing up a tree
and it trickled down my knee
Diarrhoea, Diarrhoea

That was the verse we all said at school

Ah you see when I said 12.08 i meant in the middle of the night