Lydle I missed your post until I saw Chops' reply. I say to DS1 when I see pics of monkeys "look it's you DS1" and I call him a monkey a lot, but I wouldn't say it to a black or mixed race person for fear of causing offence. I do think the girls on the bus were probably not being racist but just being 11 year old girls, but I would be and if anyone said anything like that to any of mine (we are caucasian). I got a bit upside (inwardly) yesterday when two 3-year olds told my 2-year old DS1 he was not allowed to play with them at softplay .
Chops hope my hair looked good in your dream.
Shabs, I feel for you being the strong one. Luckily for me I rely on DH to be the strong one, but if he ever fell apart I would like to think I would suddenly find I could be strong after all (am strong when on my own with DCs etc, will put a fight to anyone that tries to get in my way!). Maybe if you let your guard down your DH might show he can be the strong one too (or have you tried that one before?).
As for young Em, I would, as Mars says, get the bleeding checked to be sure. I bled alot after both my births, for 6-7 weeks, but it did calm down after the first week or two and was a lot less (although poured out when I did too much). I was an emotional mess for the first couple of months with DS1, and only better this time because I had my lovely doula coming each day saying "so have you had breakfast, what have you got planned for supper, go and lie down now etc etc". It sounds like you are doing all of that for Em and am sure she will be just fine. I also was below my pre-preg weight both times during the first few weeks after birth, am back to normal now.
Anyway, both DTs are grizzling and DS1 is shouting "don't like Tommy Zoom" so had better go.