D'y ever wonder if that's a hamster in the garden or just a DT's poo? [groin]

[estar]

Yey! I've never started a D'y thread before!!

Please someone find me and don't start a new thread.....

Ladies, I have come to call upon you once again_ Im putting together a FAQ (f*cking annoying question- from the general public) list for my friend's congrats card. Could you possibly supply some of the most FAQs and some standard/ funny answers for her please? Just to get her going.

Rubester I have been wishing the rain away all day too. Wanted to take DTs out for a stroll to see if that makes them less fractious (don't you love that word!) in the evening but all my shoes have holes in and I having wet feet.

It's a long story why my shoes have holes in!

Hey all, DTs (three weeks old today) were weighed today - Theo has gained 10oz in a week for the second week running! Esther has only gained 3 and a half oz (3oz the week before). They are 7lb2 and 4lb13 now.

Health visitor says she wants to see more of a gain from Esther next week (so do I). I forgot to ask her about a BF counsellor - how do I get in touch with one of them?

My mum was here yesterday and she said it looked like the milk was coming too fast for Esther so we put Theo on for 5mins then put her on and she seemed to take it better. It is a bit hit and miss though, sometimes she still won't go on even if he has been on first. Other times she feeds great. I think maybe I need to perservere with her at each feed - sometimes I put her down and then don't try her again until the next feed (she never really cries to be fed but I always feed them both every 3 hours at least). So now I am going to keep persevering with her for at 30 mins at each feed.

Any other ideas???

Let me get you started Duchesse and what an excellent idea!

Did you know it was twins?
Ooh you're in for double trouble
Does in run in your family?
Are they IVF?
Are they identical?
That's your family complete then.
Can you tell them apart?

Right please help what do I do when the DTs wake up hungry at the same time???

Currently I just get on with feeding one and try to rock the other in their bouncy chair to stop them wailing, and since that has zero effect eventually my head splits open and I have to go into a different room while poor other DT wails and wails.

I have tried taking care of both at once but it always ended up with both wailing. Can't get to grips with tandem feeding either - one always falls off the breast and then hasn't fed properly, cue more wailing ...

Spent ages weighing up using a dummy and whether they'd get addicted or forget how to breastfeed - shouldn't have worried they both hate it anyway! Other distractions have no effect once the red mist descends.

I also feel bad because I tend to feed Carmen first because her cry is so much more strident than Anais's - poor little Anais! I actually think she has started copying Carmen's way of crying recently. Or am I just going mad slowly?!

They are currently sleeping in cot (Carmen) and looking around on my lap (Anais) - sooo cute. It breaks my heart when they cry. Especially when they finally get their go and they sob themselves off the nipple and then start crying again! Carmen ends up mewling like a kitten, it breaks my heart.

[bad mummy emoticon] [splitting headache emoticon]

Neenz sounds like a good idea to get Theo to start her off. My DT1 (girl) gained much more slowly than DT2 (boy) still like it now. But she gained! As long as Esther is gaining steadily there's not much to worry about.

You could try breast compression

Pazza! Tandem feeding is the way to go.

Now, do you have a V pillow?

First settle the fussy babe on the breast. Making sure that you are fully supported.

Then attach second babe.

If you are fully supported at the back etc then you'll be able to have hands free to sort the fussy baby again.

I can pop over and visit next week if you like.

Also have you taken them for Cranial Osteopathy?

Did you plan to have twins?

Brilliant! Have you got any ready made answers for any of these- I can imagine that for most of them, you'd think of something to say only about a day later. Might be handy to be ready-armed... btw, my friend's were IVF- defo needs a funny answer for that one...

Okay hoochie... who'd you meet?

Gosh! You had them close didn't you?
OMG... how do you feed them?
You had a caesarean didn't you?
Ooh I know someone with twins. It's hell!

Sorry Duchesse.. no answers. I did hide all sharp instruments (and a fair few blunt ones as well I can tell ya!)

Ooh thought of the ultimate answer!

My sex life is none of your business, nor is my family history or my mental capacity!

That should cover everything!