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Multiple births

When do you start showing with twins? What is life with twins like? Join the conversation on our Multiple Births forum.

D'ya ever wonder how life still carried on like this?

1000 replies

Kelly1978 · 03/08/2006 18:22

A new thread!
Especially for throckenholt

I was hoping the original one would go to 1000, but it was gettign a but annoying scrolling all the way done, so come over here instead.

How is everyone coping with the school holidays?

I'm fed up with the rubbish weather, as we're stuck in the house too much. I daren't take them to soft play as it packed during the hols and then I can't watch all four of them. Plus it costs a fortune.
Mine are changing so much. Rav is becoming a right wuss, scared of new places. I suppose it shows awareness, but it is annoying when I've driven miles for a nice day out and he just wants to sit and whine because he is too scared to go on anything! Shay is developing his houdini skills, and now has a tendancy to bolt out of parks so I have to watch him like a hawk. I must dig out the reins before we go on holiday.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
harrogatemum · 10/10/2006 15:03

well I like to think he is a lustgod - you might all think differently!!

FarMARSWarrick · 10/10/2006 15:07

Let me know if he needs a care package of proper food won't you HM? Or even just a normal family meal with a crazy.... I mean normal family. He can pop over and eat with us when he's in dire need of company.

As long as it's not on a Thursday or he doesn't mine my slinging him out at 9 so that I can go to salsa.

Time to pick up DD2. Chat later. But the offer is a firm one!

harrogatemum · 10/10/2006 16:07

oh Mars - you are so fab - I said to him I bet if I tell Mars you are in London she will want to take you in and mother you. He sounded delighted at the prospect so I am sure he would take you up on it!

I love Mumsnet.

FarMARSWarrick · 10/10/2006 17:24

Mother him??????? Honey I want to jump his bones!

Email me and I'll remind you of my home number so that he can call. I'll be wearing my turquoise negligee.... sigh.............

KellyKrueger1978 · 10/10/2006 17:57

lol, I was thinking the same as mars, but wasn't cheeky enough to say it! But, ascot isn't far from london and I'm very lonely atm
6'3 - a bloke taller tahn me!

frumpygrumpy · 10/10/2006 20:50

cough, splutter, dirty minds girls.....I wet them laughing....no other reason [honest Guv emoticon]

Hi Tracy, lurking? lurking?, .....oh we don't do that here! Nice to have you back amongst us .

Take the help, I tried without but having DTs plus 1 plus no DP regularly around made for an unhappy time for me. I had a lady help out two nights a week (and my lovely mum two nights). Although I hated having my helper lady and got rid of her as soon as I felt able, it was useful and did get me through a time.

Doris hasn't posted since Sunday - its now TUESDAY

piximon · 10/10/2006 21:17

Well I've had a day from hell and my twins aren't even here yet.
Started off badly when I went to see my consultant and sat there for an hour before he called me in. Then had to explain scan fiasco last week (person doing scan was new, decided to switch twin 1 and twin 2 so results all mixed up). Had to be rescanned by consultant. One twin is much smaller then the other although apparently no cause for concern just yet. (Bloody concerns me though!).
Any ideas on how to boost growth?

Then dd(2) and ds(3.5) decided to become possessed by demons and spent most of day screaming (at each other and me) about everything. Found crayon drawings on the kitchen floor, (which is messey enough since having trouble hoovering and mopping). And then dd bit ds on the arm. And on and on. Lost my temper in the end so put them both to bed early.
I will cope with 4, I will cope with 4, I will cope with 4, I will run away...

frumpygrumpy · 10/10/2006 21:26

Aw piximon, crap days, I do them well. My mantra is "next year it'll all be different". Its an age thing, when your youngest are about 4 it'll be much easier, its just getting there that is hard. How long to go?

frumpygrumpy · 10/10/2006 21:27

with the pg I mean

1becomes3 · 10/10/2006 21:43

Hi went to see my "lovely" midwife today, thank god I get to deal with the hospital more this time than with her, took 3 attempts to get a vein nice bruise (at least none burst this time)then she suddenly remembered that because I am 12 weeks I should look into the 'downs' test which has to be done by 13weeks 6 days!
I did ask her about the risk of losing one or both of the babies or any other complications but she didn't know.
Can anyone shed any light on this, is there a greater risk in twins?
Been watching to much eastenders and a bit worried about what I should do.

piximon · 10/10/2006 22:10

Hi FG I'm 27wks +3days, so still some way to go.

1B3 I'm not sure about invasive screening. I turned 30 during this pg and so was only offered the nuchal scan. My team of midwives won't take blood, always send me off to the hospital (average waiting time an hour) for my blood tests. Will have that to look forward to again next week.

I asked the last midwife I saw about her experience level with twin deliveries and she said she'd only ever delivered the first of each of the four sets as there had always been complications. She also said that all the midwives locally have same level of twin delivery exp so not very inspiring.

KellyKrueger1978 · 10/10/2006 23:29

hi 1becomes3. with twins they have to perform the amniocentesis twice if they are going to do it, so I suppose it probably would be a higher risk. I had the blood test with my twins, but didn't need the amniocentesis. We had decided we would have the test if needed, because we were going to have four under 4, and already have one ds with sn and so weren't sure if we could cope with the idea of another one or two children with sn also. I don't know if faced with that decision we would have thought the same or not. You could at least have the intitial blood test then decide, or ask about nuchal fold screening?

piximom, hope you get some better advice soon. I had a section so no help really. I know some mums on in had successful vaginal delivery though, and hopefully doris will be reporting back soon!

throckenholt · 11/10/2006 08:46

Harrogatemum - did your mum have 10 kids ? If not tell her to take a hike (bet she didn't have twins either !).

1B3 - welcome. I think your midwife was talking about the nuchal fold scan (in my area only routinely offered to multiples because the blood tests don't work). Are yours id or non-id - potential risks are higher in pregnancy for id - (mine are id and are fine) you usually have more frequent monitoring scans with them.

Piximon - don't think you can improve growth - are they id or not ? If not - then maybe you just have one littlie and one biggie. If id - then you probably have what I had - one twins had 2/3 of the placenta - the other only 1/3 (he did pretty well on that 1/3 considering ). In my case they monitored closely and induced at 35 weeks when they decided littlie was not growing and would be better out than in (and his greedy brother got kicked out too ).

Those of you with short cycles - google short luteal phase - can't remember what exactly but there is some vitamin or mineral that helps increase the luteal phase by getting the hormones back in the right balance - and may help the pmt at the same time.

leogaela · 11/10/2006 10:11

I've been a bit of a lurker since my last post , I haven't had much inspiration to write anything but have enjoyed reading your posts!

1B3, I'm very, very happy for you! I am now 18 weeks pregnant with twins - you do get over the shock, its scarey but feels really special ! I'm taking a multi-pregancy vitamin (sometimes - it made me constipated at the beginningn and now makes me feel sick). As for morning sickness maybe i was lucky, it was much worse with ds. I am however twice as tired as I was with ds and at 18 weeks twice as big as I was with ds which I find a little bit worrying!
I think the risk with twins is higher, but depending on which type of twins they are - identical twins with one amniotic sac and one placenta seem to be highest risk - but if that's what you've got then you're not alone that's what I have got! Give it time to sink in before you start researching too much if not (if you are like me) you will worry yourself stupid! A nuchal scan wasn't available to me, the triple blood test with twins is useless, so I had no idea of the risk of sn of the twins, I would prefer to know as much as possible before than after (except the sex of the babies) so opted for an amnio. As there is only one amniotic sac I only had to have one done (phew). In hindsight it seems pretty pointless as the risk of something else happening later that could produce an sn child seems to be a much higher risk than something that would show up in the amnio. Its a tough one! I should get the results on Friday!

Doris, I love your advice about getting help and the idea of having cards with jobs on them for people to do is a great idea!

Marslady, don't be silly , we have a cleaner, I can't manage doing housework with 1 child let alone with 3! I'm also going to find a teenager to help out evenings and at the moment ds goes to nursery on Friday so I can have a day for myself resting and swanning around doing nothing ! I'm thoroughly spoilt, but I think i need it and so does dh! He is trying to persuade me to go off sick from work so I can just concentrate on being pregnant!

I got a delivery of books from amazon today ! 4 twin books! can't wait until Friday when i will have time to laze around and start reading them !

Oh, no news from Doris since ... Sunday!!!! Good luck Doris!

Ooops, that's a bit of a long post

harrogatemum · 11/10/2006 12:28

Wow - it is really busy on here!

Mars - I will email you at lunchtime when I have stopped "working".

Re nuchal scans etc - I had one but just had the scan and not the blood tests etc. I was 32 when I was pregnant with the twins. I had to pay for mine though as they dont provide them on the NHS where I live, but I figured it was worth it.

Throckenholt - no my Mum had two kids....so she doesnt know what the hell she is talking about! I had my young girl come over for the first time last night - it was a bit strange, she helped because she played with the boys and read to them whilst I got on with things that I would normally leave until they were in bed - washing/sorting out kitchen/doing a bit of prep for my dinner etc. She helped me with the bath and helped me lift them etc. and that was about it but I guess I did feel a bit more rested than I had done the night before.

Piximon - I had a natural delivery - well as natural as it can be with two midwives, two docs and a paediatrician! I had an epidural and they ended u being born with the aid of a ventouse, but they did come out the way nature intended! You can CAT me if you want to ask any questions, I am happy to help.

ANd WHERE IS DORIS !!!??? We need Mr Doris to get on here and post what the devil is going on........

frumpygrumpy · 11/10/2006 13:27

Wow, it is busy! You pregnant ones can have the couch, I'm happy down here on the rug .

Mars, be a love and rustle up a slab of lemon dizzle cake, we can't do this without it!!!

Throkenholt thanks for the advice, will google that NOW.

I had horrible care when I was pg with my dd and so told my gp which hospital she was to send me to with the DTs. It was probably 20 miles further away than my local one (and I was worried about giving birth on the way there for my weekly checks) but they were really wonderful. The midwives who delivered my twins had done it heaps of times before and were calm, friendly, humourous ladies.

I didn't have an amnio so can't give any help there. I just had one very detailed scan and then a fortnightly growth scan that turned weekly later. I did have such a lot of monitoring that I'm sure they will keep a close eye on growth for you.

We need another thread to list outservles on so we can keep track of whos who!! Alexh has posted under this one and I've suggested she pops in too - hope she brings wine and crisps for us and cranberry juice and mandarins for the pg ones .

No doris yet, I feel two babies coming on .

harrogatemum · 11/10/2006 15:03

You're right FG, we need a roll call of everyone I am getting all confused, pregnancy has made my brain go like marshmallow.

JuA · 11/10/2006 15:46

Hi everyone - it is far too long since I last posted - but this thread is moving so fast I barely get enough time to keep up! My 2 are currently crashed out - one on a bean bag and one on the sofa - we have just got back from their 7 month check with the health visiter - she did ask some stoopid questions - when did they first smile? - hmmmmm that would have been ..... - yes well I have not got a clue - I can barely remember what they did last week!!
For those that are pregnant (and everyone else!! ) I would recommend eating dark chocolate to keep your iron levels up - I couldn't stand the iron tablets I was "supposed" to take - I managed about 14 during my whole pregnancy! but the green and blacks meant my iron levels actually increased!!
Just say yes to all help - my cleaner is my life saver - my house is at least clean under all the chaos!!
DT1 is awake - will have to go

devondoris · 11/10/2006 16:47

Hello lovely people! Oh I do appreciate you all! Thank you for thinking of us. For the slightly newer than me people on this thread - it's so supportive and brilliant!

So news ... We are still as one. Had a scan yesterday and got the sonographer to check out the placentas to make sure they weren't reaching post maturity, and do a doppler on the heartbeats to make they were OK, and obviously check growth, which is also fine. Saw the hosp midwife who checked blood pressure, which was up slightly but that always happens in the hosp - must be their machines... So boys are happy where they are, I'm happy where I am. Lovely consultant then threw everything up in the air and said she'd like to induce next Tuesday, and why didn't she do a sweep while we were there just to move things along a bit. She had a poke about but I said no to the sweep and told her I'd get one of my midwives to do it today. She was OK with that and told me that although the bottom of my cervix is open the top is still closed. Thought I was kind of OK about it all, until I happened to speak to the man selling us our new (old!) volvo at which point I lost it because he hadn't told me that I couldn't pay for it with a cheque, even though we live in the same town, it's only just over a grand which is not a lot for a car these days, and he knows where we live! Anyone else done the, "But I'm having twins NOW! Don't you understand what that means?????" I put the phone down on him and lovely DD asked if I was cross with her, and then gave me lots of cuddles and said, "Don't worry, Mummy, Daddy will sort it out for you." And stroked my hair. Nearly, nearly came on to MN to tell you all the woes, but decided to wait til after the midwife this morning.

Also told DH in no uncertain terms what it was going to mean to have boys here without him, and what would happen on a 3 hour feeding routine (which I know I would be very lucky to have early on but had to give him some kind of idea what might happen). He went very quiet. About time too.

So went for a 2.5 mile walk this morning to bounce DT1's head on the top of my cervix (absolutely nothing doing but my pelvis still seems to be in one piece fortunately), and then went to midwife and poured the story to her. She said she'd pop round on Friday morning to do the sweep because it would much better than at clinic, and anyway, she couldn't do a sweep with the top of the cervix still closed. So what was the consultant talking about??? Arrrrrgh!

And now I'm wondering if there's any difference in the gestation periods of naturally conceived twins and IVF/ART conceived twins - do any of you mind me asking? From talking to friends at twinsclub it feels as though naturally conceived stay in longer, but I'm not sure. Does anyone else know anything about it? It would just help if I do get to next week to have an idea, but I don't want to offend anyone by asking.

So feeling very teary, spots appearing here and there, and I think it's got to be hormone changes in readiness, and I'm worrying again about how to cope once DH has gone back to working in London and Mum is back in the shop. I can't ask her to do a nightshift with me when she does 2x12 hour days in the shop and the rest of the week 8 hours a day. She's already retired 3 times!

Ho hum. Life will go on so long as I don't strangle anyone. I'm actually a lot happier now after my walk and midwife visit.

Anyway, more important things - I can still giggle (sorry!) over the children not doing what they're supposed to stories. At the very least it makes me feel so ... normal!

1B3 - Having Twins by Elizabeth Noble has lots of good reading in it and tells you what to worry about and what not to; lots of stuff about tests too. Can't help you with the tests because I only had my first scan at 20 weeks having refused the 12 week one. I've also cancelled other scans when I haven't felt they've been medically necessary, but I have done lots of research and my nice consultant does actually discuss things with me rather than tell me what to do these days. (Not sure why I agreed to book an induction next week though.) In the end you have to do what YOU think is right for your pregnancy and your children. Oh, and the Viridian Pregnancy Complex supplement kept me going. Sounds like your supplement may have a dodgy sort of iron in it - can't remember which sort it is, but one of them can constipate you. I didn't have any probs with the Viridian one. You have to get it from an independent health food shop - if they haven't got it ask them to order it!

Oh sorry, this is sooooo long! I like to save it all up and blurt it all out in one go, you see!

Must go make a raspberry leaf tea cake with DD who is patiently waiting for me - again. Poor child. Will keep you posted!

xx

throckenholt · 11/10/2006 16:49

roll call

KellyKrueger1978 · 11/10/2006 16:57

Hi JuA nice to see things are going well for you.

Doris, what are you doing still here! And 2.5 mile walk?! I went for a 3 min walk when at 38 weeks and collapsed in the middle of the road. A crowd on concerned people gathered round probably wondering if I had made a crater in the road! Get that raspberry tea down you and follow it up with a vindaloo.

frumpygrumpy · 11/10/2006 17:36

Doris, doris, D O R I S !!!!!

Breathe woman, breathe!!! Thats gotta be bigger than anything I've ever done surely - and thats saying something

Its fine, its all fine, it will be fine, busy but fine.

Sounds like things are beginning to happen....I was 41 weeks and went in to be induced. I was dreading it and when I got there they said I was actually in labour but just hadn't felt anything [cross eyebrows, bloody confused emoticon].

I'm sure it will happen soon. Take as much time as you can in hospital to physically rest before going home. My hospital was so fantastic they took the DTs away to the nursery at night so I could get some uninterrupted (sp?) sleep before I went home. I wasn't comfortable with it at first but looking back it was a godsend.

Hi JuA lol at your HV, "when did they first smile" did you resist the temptation to say "who the f cares?" .

Right. I'm nipping out to fill the fridge, we have extra guests in here today and we must make them comfortable.

FarMARSWarrick · 11/10/2006 17:50

DD... no reason for you to need any of that babe! Your birth plan is fine, you're fine, the babies are fine. Honestly. Everyone is always in such a hurry.

I didn't have any tests with mine and far too many scans. If I did it again I wouldn't bother with 80% of them.

FG... can't make Lemon Drizzle before Friday. In case I hadn't mentioned it I have an exam in the morning!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Just waiting for the reinforcements to come before I pop over to the cafe and have a luvverly cuppa and a slice of chocolate cake.... I mean go and revise!

Love to you all. Will concentrate on you all properly on Friday. Oh and Doris....... cross your legs love! I can't be doing two thought processes at once now can I?

frumpygrumpy · 11/10/2006 20:21

Oohh Mars, tomorrow already!!?! Tooooomooooroooow, toooomooorrrooooow I LOVE YA, Toooomooorrrroowww, its only a GIN aaaway .

Ok, ok, Friday it is then. I'll make banana and chocolate chip muffins if everyone is ok with that and that will get us through tomorrow.

Mars, what can I do for you? Need songs, dancing, cross my legs?, neck massage, hearty slap on the back or kisses blown???? Whatever, I wish you luck from the heart of my bottom and the other way round XXX.

throckenholt · 11/10/2006 20:39

devondoris - when you have them with you at home try very hard to find someone to split the night shift with you - - they stay up til say midnight or 1am - you go to bed at 8ish - get 4-5 hours sleep - then you handle to midnight to morning shift while they sleep. That way you at least get one decent stretch of sleep, and they just stay up a bit later.

That kept me vaguely human in the first months - especially when you have to be awake in the daytime to deal with another child.

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