TTTTT

[ladymuckbeth]

Here we go. More unexpurgated chat about our darling angels, all of whom are gifted and have exceptionally calm and admirably-coping parents.

[AtLongLast]

Tarti How are you feeling about the move being so imminent? It's come around so fast!

Has S had his chop yet Cerub? We were lucky in that J was sold on a toy that our first hair dresser gave him to play with and then the apron thingy he had at the next cut that he was great, and that gave W the confidence to give it a go. We really need to go this week as W in particular is looking rather overgrown. Don't think C will be as easy though (not that she's having a haircut anytime soon afaic). She's already done the jaws clamped tightly shut at the dentist. Def not as compliant as the boys!

Swimming went really well LVB. There are 5 in their group and they all looked so sweet. Really helped being others there I think because they were happy to copy the others in jumping in etc. Boys were mainly OK but kept wanting to come over to excitedly tell me what they were doing. & J dawdled in getting back to the group after their quick play on the slide so he was told off but I was pleased with them since it was the first time they've done a proper thing under instruction. Was a bit worried about whether they'd willingly use armbands in our family swim but they were fine. They loved it, have developed some sort of hero-worship of their teacher & are looking forward to this week.

[rattling]

I have been reading, and mostly enjoying everyone's exploits - yes especially the disasterous ones.

The boys are awful in the pool - thankfully M.s grommits means it is banned for a few months, so no more being screamed at in the name of entertainment. To make up for it I started swimming lessons and yesterday did a bit of diving! (Okay, toppling headfirst into the pool - but it was the bravest thing I've done in a while).

They are, however, fabulous at getting their hair cut. My parents usually take them, and finally M.s fringe has grown out enough to get it done. Someone hacked his fringe off with the toddler-safe craft scissors. No, not 4 year old A, or even M. himself. DH did it!!

Anyway, just thought I should de-lurk out of politeness, let you know I am here in the background. Hope it is sunnier where you are, I'm off tomorrow, not sure the park idea is going to work out judging by the clouds.

[AtLongLast]

Ooh, how are adult swim lessons rattling? I've toyed with the idea. Won't be long before I'm the weakest swimmer by far in the family. Self-taught doggy paddle is my speciality...

We managed to miss the boys' lessons yesterday . Dp was ill so off sick but perked up a little by lunchtime so thought I'd time C's nap so I could leave her sleeping while i took the boys swimming. Except I fell asleep while cuddled up with C & dp didn't think to find out where I'd gotten to til after the time the lesson should have started. Was gutted. Boys were really looking forward to it & I was looking forward to watching them without needing to entertain C.

Dp is taking the boys for a much-needed haircut tomorrow. Am dreading it because i think we have different opinions about how long their hair should be. I think dp knows how much grief he is in for if he gets it wrong......

First proper trip to a&e with C today. She fell down a couple of stairs & had a nasty cut just above her eyebrow we weren't with her so no idea how she managed it. Proper terrified screams poor thing. Surprisingly little blood but a bit deep so she had it glued. Apparently charming, cute, smiley, waving to anyone & everyone but the dr & nurse who glued her together. She saved her best death stare for them .

[chesticles]

Stupidly busy here with primary school visits, nursery school visits, me being away with work and just general the chaos that seems to be my life. Will try and catch up at the weekend, hope everyone doing well.

[chesticles]

Ooh, very quiet on here.

Things going ok with me. The boys are good at the moment. H is a bit of a nightmare though. Really whingy. And she had also taken against going to the childminder. Huge fights in the morning about not wanting to go, complains a lot of an ouchy tummy, but I don't think she does, I think it's an excuse. She crys shen she gets there, she sulks all day. It's a nightamre. No idea where it's come from. Ok, she's never really liked the childminders that much, but all this crying has blown up in the last week. I think is has to do with finishing nusery school for the summer, and starting primary in August. And also that she knows she is finishing with the childminder at the end of July. I've tried asking directly what is wrong, but she just says she wants to be with mummy. I've tried coming at it indirectly, but still nothing.
Part of me wants to not make her go, as I know she is miserable. But we don't really have any option. But also I don't want to give in to her, and let her learn that stropping and throwing tantrums gets her way. She has to learn that she has to make the most of situations, and that noone is going to have fun for her, she has to join in to have the fun. Be a bit more positive about things. There is nothing actually wrong at the childminders, and the poor woman is horrified that Hazel is so miserable and is being over backwards to try and make her happy.
Anyway, we've only got a few more weeks to get through. But makes me feel like a really horrible mum forcing H to go where she doesn't want to go

Sorry for the me me me rant. Hope everyone else is doing ok. Cerub, hope your pair are being a bit better for you. Everyone I speak to seems to be having grumpy children at the moment, must be the time of year.

[LaVitaBellissima]

Sorry for my lack of posting

• potty training
  

• driving test 4th time unlucky on Weds plus the front tooth is finally coming out on the same day, I have a denture for 3 months whilst it heals then I need to choose to have either a dental implant or a bridge
  

• bed time disaster zone even if I drop daytime naps the girls are refusing to go to bed and are bouncing off the walls it is 10.20pm and F is still awake
  

It is not good here at he moment. is helping!

[tartiflette]

Checking in from under a pile of packing boxes. In my ahem NEW LIFE I will be much better about posting...

Lavita - all sounds very tough. I feel you re. bedtimes, we have similar. I think I will be putting mine into separate bedrooms before very long to be honest as I know they would settle better alone and let's face it we need our evenings.

Chesti - sounds tough. I'm sure you're absolutely right to stick it out and let her learn the lesson especially as the minder sounds nice. Fingers crossed for a lovely start to primary to make up for all this. Is it you who has a lovely sounding tiny local school?

Kisses to all

[Cerubina]

Sorry also for lack of posts here. Glad the thread hasn't completely died!

LVB I hope the driving test went well and the tooth extraction wasn't too grim. Two things to dread in the same day was a bum deal! Onwards and upwards with the tooth situation at least, it must have been very uncomfortable over the last couple of months.

Good luck with the move on Friday tarti. Hope you have the sort of vendors who leave a bottle of wine/champagne for you to enjoy on your first night and not the sort who leave a blocked toilet or stolen light fittings. Cheers to your new life down 'south' .

Your post makes me realise I should make the most of my two enjoying going to nursery, chesti. To start every day with a battle over not wanting to go is extra stress you definitely don't need. Is she old enough to be able to tell you if something happened that upset her? Just wondering if the childminder might have reprimanded her or one of the other children might have been a bit physical or something. It could well just be trying her luck though! So hard to second guess their motives isn't it.

All change in my situation as of a couple of weeks ago. My husband confessed he had made a terrible mistake and couldn't stand being away from us. He has finished it with the OW and wants to do whatever it takes to get our marriage back on track. I hadn't really seen it coming, though I knew he was struggling about being away from the children. Since he has made it clear that his main motive is to come back to me I have agreed to work on it, and he's back here again (spare room). Things are going well so far, it's surprisingly comfortable to spend time together again and it is definitely great to have the help with the children. The rest of it all needs time and counselling, so that is the next step.

Almost overnight the sense of relief at not having to manage on my own and all the stress, anxiety and grief I've been going through poured in on me and I succumbed to a cold that kept me off work for a week and then a tummy bug this week. Clear that my immune system is shot from all the stress. Hopefully I will now be able to rebuild a bit of resistance.

Mindful of all of which I say mucky please do take care of yourself and if you can engineer a couple of nights off to recharge your batteries please do xx.

[AtLongLast]

Wow, not surprised it's gone a bit dead quiet here - you've all got so much going on!!

Poor you, childminder and H Chesti! Maybe it is anxiety about school but difficult for you. At least the boys are being lovely...

Argh LVB. It will be worth it once you get your licence but a pain to be a long road. It mostly is down to luck on the day, I'm sure, so don't get despondent. You'll have a good story to tell when you get there. Bugger about the tooth - poor you! She certainly got you good & proper!

Cerub. Just Wow. Everything crossed for you but glad you're taking it slowly for now.

Good luck tomorrow Tarti - it has come around so fast!

Things here are good. Boys are fab. C is a limpet-child, but luckily cute and funny . W & C have such a strong bond & lovely to see. They were both in our bed yesterday am ( vv rare) and woke at the same time. The joy at seeing one another was gorgeous to see &'C jumped up to go give W a cuddle. Off to our country house this weekend again - went last weekend and boys didn't want to leave. Then next weekend we're off camping for a week with ILs staying in a caravan at the same place. Then I have a few weeks where kiddies are in nursery while I'm 'working from home'.... Plans, plans, plans

[chesticles]

LVB, how did the driving test go? Hopefully it's good news. But like ALL says, I think it is mostly luck on the day, I know loads of careful drivers who took a few attempts to pass. Hope the tooth is OK too.

Tarti congratulations on the move. Hope life in Sheffield is good to you.

cerub, hope things are going OK with D(?)H. Must be very strange

Hope everything OK with everyone else too and you are all enjoying the sun.

[LaVitaBellissima]

Thanks ladies, I've been quiet as I failed again driving myself crazy with it, this time I failed for speeding! I did the test in a different town and didn't know the roads. I drove well but on some of the country roads I thought I was in a 40 zone but it was 30 so 6 minors but 3 were for speeding so an automatic fail....
Tooth came out ok but it just feels quite traumatic emotionally, losing a front tooth, I know the denture is temporary, and it looks great, no one can tell, but it's horrible taking out, cleaning it, etc

Anyway, we are off on holiday for 3 weeks on Friday, so I am in the midst of washing, ironing, cleaning, packing etc weather is amazing here at the moment!

Cerub glad you are feeling happier, still think we need to organise drinks one night, End August/Sept maybe with Mucky and anyone else down our way.

Kate hope all is ok with you and the girls

ALL enjoy your camping, your in laws are nice aren't they?

Tarti how is the move going?

Chesti How is H about the childminders at the moment, maybe one of the other children is being horrid? How is the weather up your way?



Happy Summer holidays everyone :)

[Cerubina]

Hi ladies, long overdue for a check in and I hope everyone's well.

Really sorry about the driving test failure LVB. It is such a bummer getting all keyed up and then something going wrong on the day, and one can't help but feel irritated at all the lunatics less careful folk one sees driving who have apparently managed to pass their test. Anyway, I guess there's nothing for it but to keep plugging away? When you do pass, your confidence will soar.

Hope the holiday is going well, although I saw your message on fb that the girls had chicken pox - what awful timing! Very inconsiderate of them - hope there's still plenty of holiday left by the time they get over it.

I'm sure the pox must be around the corner here too, there's so much of it going around and there was a case of it at nursery two weeks ago, but so far not a sign here. It wouldn't be a bad moment for it to happen as work tends to be quieter over summer, insofar as pox-ridden children are ever something to be welcomed!

How has the move gone tarti? It must be a wrench to leave somewhere that you've lived for a long time and move so far away - all of my moves have just been to different postcodes in London so we've never had a big upheaval of jobs and friendships and all the rest of it. I hope Sheffield is looking like an exciting fresh start. Where did you get to with the job situation? How's DH's new role going?

You must be about to break up/have just broken up now ALL. What are your summer holiday plans? And same question to you chesti - last few weeks of pre-school living! Is H back on form with the childminder?

Things are going well here. Loving the sunshine although the humidity has done awful things to my hair and is very draining on the commute. I also find shoes an absolute disaster area in summer, just can't seem to find any that I would be happy to walk a longish distance in that aren't hideous. But apart from that, I would never complain about summer - it's so nice to have a good one this year.

Counselling is underway and I think it will be very positive. We have a man (which seems a bit odd - somehow feels like more of a woman's job?) and signs look positive that he'll be able to help. Had a session on my own the other evening and he asked about my family - very interesting discussion. These people you know so well you barely even think about your relationship and their influence on you...

Have just turned 41 and reflected that being 40 was absolute crap. Almost the whole year was dominated by my marital woes and was painful in the extreme (though I suppose that took my mind off being 40 as such!) so I hope the next year is a better one. It looks as though it might be.

[LaVitaBellissima]

Hello everyone????

[Cerubina]

Don't look at me, I was the last one to write a substantial contribution! I think we are all bruised by killing the thread on various occasions...

So what's up ladies? How were the various holidays and how's settling in going in your new part of the world tarti?

I've been reading "Calmer, Easier, Happier Parenting" and as soon as H is up to speed, we're going to present a united front and get cracking. It sounds very attractive if it's to be believed - specific praise for specific actions/behaviours supposedly breeds much more cooperation than just saying "well done!" all the time, and there's a technique called 'never ask twice' that sounds like the answer to my prayers when it comes to nappies, getting dressed etc... We shall see.

Potty training is underway with S but in quite a lowkey way. Not sure we've made massive progress yet due to inconsistency on when nappies are taken off, but I'm not in a mad rush. There are also signs that we may need to make the switch to beds at some point soon, though not rushing that one.

Hope all's good with you all - miss hearing from you! X

[AtLongLast]

Oooh, 'ello! I'm getting out of the habit of checking in cos it's so quiet!

Things are good here. I'm back at work next week but have had a fab time away from work. On the one hand I've been so busy I could do with another month off to get through a bit more of my to-do list, but I also felt myself getting a little excited at the thought of work today saddo.

Our holiday in Scarborough was the sort of perfect childhood UK seaside holiday you remember dream of. Family, seaside, donkey rides, pirate boat trip, trains, swimming, ice cream...... - the sunshine definitely made it! We've been away every weekend since the beginning of July though and are craving a weekend at home. The tent has had an active summer. Need to go to Wales this weekend but weekend after is all ours.

Sadly, our dog died the other week, the one big downer of the summer. We had gone up to see dp's gran who had taken ill & the dog died in the car while we were driving back home. Although it was sad, she was 14 and beginning to slow right down so I'm mainly relieved we didn't have to make any difficult decisions about treatment / putting to sleep. It's been a useful lesson about death for the boys too.......... !

Kiddies are all OK. W has developed a stammer & we're trying to ignore but it's hard when he sounds like a demented seal!! He's also become aware that he is doing it so doing it even more, with a cheeky grin in the middle. It's hard because even ignoring actually can mean he's getting attention because we need to listen longer to find out what he's going to say. V common at this age though so hopefully he'll just grown out of it. Nursery say his best friend has a stammer so he may just be copying. They hadn't noticed til I pointed it out.... sounds about right....

Major leap forward with bedtime. C has suddenly discovered the ability to self settle in the last week (I know... she's only 21months....). & when she woke at 11pm the other night I went to take her into our bed as usual & she dropped to her tummy & asked me to pat her bottom.... and went back to sleep until 2ish anyway. Dp was away too so it was really weird going to bed on my own!

[chesticles]

Sorry for lack of posting from me too, it's been a manic summer. We've been having some building work done taking the wall down between the kitchen and dining room to make a huge room along the back of the house. In theory the kids stuff now stays in the kitchen/dining/family area and I have a proper adult sitting room back but in reality there is still kids clutter all over the house. And the newly painted room shows just how shabby the rest of the house is. I know how I want to decorate a lot of it, it's just finding the time to do it!

We've also been away for a couple of weeks on holiday which was lovely, but not very relaxing. A sort of road trip round England catching up with loads of people we haven't seen in ages. Lovely in a lot of ways, and when I got back to work it felt like I'd been away for months. But it was exhausting. Spend a few days in York at the end though and it was lovely there, would definitely go back.

And the last couple of weeks have been busy with H starting school, and D + J starting preschool and the changes in childcare and routines that comes with it. It's actually even more complicated than before if that is possible! But fingers crossed that once the first couple of weeks are past we'll all feel a bit more settled.

Hope everyone is doing ok.

[tartiflette]

Hi everyone. Am hideously behind on everyone's news, just marking my place so I can find thread again when I get a spare minute!

[tartiflette]

Just thought I would check in but it seems the thread has died

Just a quick update then. The girls have started their new preschool which seems ok. They were extremely trying over the summer holidays, especially as there was so much that needed doing to the house and I really needed them to stay out of the way a lot of the time (totally unreasonable I know).
I'm just doing a bit of tutoring while I look for a proper job. Making cups of tea for workmen has become my new vocation

How are you all? I watched the three day nanny last week with twin boys and it made me miss our multiple based moan fest - er I mean mutual support!

[AtLongLast]

I just checked in and look! A new post

I've been wondering how you're getting on Tarti. Thought about you in the first week of term &'wondered if you were missing the madness of a new sept or relishing the peace from it. I hope the girls are feeling a bit more settled now you have a new routine & things start to feel a bit calmer / normal. Are you happy with the decision thus far (other than missing your old city, of course ). Is dh enjoying his new job?

Things here ok, though it feels like we've hit winter illness a bit soon as we're all full of snot . Poor C has a urine infection too & spent the am at the walk in trying to catch a wee sample. Luckily she's starting to toilet train so made things slightly easier. During the general check over it transpired that her cold is, in fact, bronchiolitis again. Nurse was full of concern about how congested she is but she's a million times better than a week ago. In our defence we did do a midnight trek to A&E cos we were worried last week, but C was the image of health by the time dp got there with her so he brought her home again.

Boys are great. W has had a couple of huge meltdowns today which were pretty funny. I've had a couple of washing related traumas with J recently - daring to wash his new fav underpants resulted him sitting on my knee sobbing 'you made me so sad mummy'. J has been astounding me with his obvious geniusness. He was playing with an aeroplane the other day & decided to switch off the pretend engines so he could talk to me. I pointed out that the plane would fall from the sky. Silly mummy - the wheels are still going around, it will be ok .

[LaVitaBellissima]

Just marking my place, have a stinking cold but will post very soon

[tartiflette]

Hi both!
Poor C, ALL. Remember when M had a UTI and getting urine samples was a bleedin nightmare. Hope the bronchiolitis clears up quickly.
Boys sound cute

Things have settled down here, sort of, the house is an ongoing nightmare (lots to do, to put it mildly) but the girls are settling down and enjoying preschool. I am starting to do a bit of tutoring in the evenings but I definitely do miss the buzz of being in school, not to mention just having some adult company. Have made a friend in the park who I am not letting go of (!) and have an old school friend starting her mat leave next month, plus have said I will join the preschool committee to force me to mingle (Urgh).
Will get there although I do miss my old life a bit. DH is ok, I don't see much of him but have a crush on my builder

How are your two Lavita and how is business going?

[tartiflette]

Come back everyone!!

[AtLongLast]

Hmm, I def wrote a post the other night. God knows where it ended up!

Is your house popping up lots of surprises that need sorting or are you plodding through a long list of stuff you knew you'd have to do? We're back to considering moving again. Just around the corner, but it does have the potential for a garden which is the main thing we're missing. It would mean going back to a `project' again though. After finally getting sorted after forever living in projects, I'm not 100% sure. But we do have a good builder now. & did I say we would have a garden? We need to sell one of our houses (haha) first though so no doubt the one I'm watching will go in the meantime... tho it has been on the market for at least 4 months now...

Loving the image of you latching onto a poor unsuspecting lady in the park . A necessary evil. I find the thought of preschool committee things strangely exciting .

[LaVitaBellissima]

I'm here, signing back in for Winter!,

Tarti, I did the same really, I'd lived in house for 3 years pre children but only knew 2 people locally. I basically invited 2 girls I met at baby weigh in out for lunch and we've been friends ever since.
You will settle in well and thanks Our business going well and I am out doing jewellery bits and pieces in the run up to Christmas, lots of lovely new stuff on there!

We have been having the debate of moving again too AtLongLast DP is keen as we could get a huge detached house if we moved a 20 minute drive outside of London.
I am a bit unsure though as I feel like I'm really settling into my group of friends and finally getting some semblance of a social life, exercise class, we've started a book wine club and I might join a running club soon and start building my fitness up. I feel happy here, and am not sure.... Will link to prospective house soon.
I think the best option for now is to extend our kitchen into the side return but after the nightmare that was our loft extension I am a bit apprehensive

I still haven't passed my driving test, still want to lose a stone and still haven't potty trained the girls, they still wake in the night and I am still fairly rubbish at this parenting malarkey

What else? I bought the girls some very cute kickers as their Winter shoes

[KateShmate]

Marking my place to come and write a proper reply!
So my DTrip's have started school! I know I'm biased, but they are definitely 3 of the most adorable little reception-ists ever! They're all getting on so brilliantly - love their teacher, come home desperate to learn words etc etc. First few days they just seemed to be on some kind of adrenaline rush, by the friday they were in such horrific, over-tired moods that I did beans on toast for tea as soon as they got home ad then straight up to bed - poor little minions were asleep by 4.45pm! A and J woke up late the next day and were back to 'normal' but poor E seems to be struggling again - tiredness just seems to take over her but I'm sure she'll get used to it.

ALL Poor C with being poorly, I hope she's all okay now though. Bronchiolitis is the devil :(

LVB I read that last bit as 'I bought the girls some really cute knickers' ha ha! I've only really looked at Clarks this year, but in a bit of a confused state as I really don't like black boots, but having just spent £££'s for school shoes for 5, I don't want to buy 2 pairs of boots for each girl? I'm tempted to get some Emu's for the girls this year - they do amazing kids ones and are so much more grippy than Ugg's underfoot which is probably best for children. www.emuaustralia.com/store/kids/footwear.html - mine would just do anything to pick a pair of them! I just love warm boots :)