The under/over/around 1 Twins thread for support, tips on how to survive and enjoy twin parenthood!

[DreamingOfPeace]

BB3: dcda non id girls Sept 2011 (plus ds)
TwelveLeggedWalk: DCDA DD and DS 14.09.11 (PFBs)
Tiggersreturn twin boys (?!) (plus ds age 5)
Wherearemyearplugs twins (plus ds)
Ceeveebee b/g twins 21.11.11, PFBs
minesapintofwine: non-id boys 02/02/2012. dcs 1&2/pfb on good days.
ClaireMarathonFeeder: Boy/girl twins born 08/02/2012, no3&4, dd1 (2001) and dd2 (2004)
rednellie nonID boys 13.03.2012 + DD 03.02.10
Lemele: id boys (plus ds)
Skitoo : DCDA Non ID Boys, 01.04.12 DC 1&2
DreamingofPeace: dcda non id boys, 4.4.12 DC 2&3 (DD Sept 2010)
beyoglu: dcda non id girls 21.4.12
Bigboobsatlast ID twin boys 30.04.12 DC #2&3 (DD Feb 2010)
Scollister mcda girls 3.5.12 plus DD age 4
Twin2makes4 mcda girls plus 2 ds,age 8 & 4

Again, sorry for mistakes, doing this from my phone!

Settle in ladies :)

Hello all.

Sorry everyone's I'll dream. What is croup? I've never heard of it!

Sounds like you are making progress Claire!! I think you are bring hard on yourself. Im with you on the leaving them crying thong, cant bear it. Re breast feeding, I'm not sure when I'll stop, I sort of have a love hate relationship with it, don't think I'll get as far as you though! I too wish we lived closer, I would love to have a twin mummy friend!

Baby massage was good but there were only two other peo
Had a pretty horrendous morning today, I've been finding them difficult this week as they've been crying s lot, esp dtg and they just want me to hold them all the time but c difficult to hold both at the same time.

Oops posted too soon....
So finishing baby massage paragraph.... There were only two other mum there (all other french mums are apparently just stuck at home bring depressed) but one if them was nice so you never know, could be a potential friend. How drsperate am I!

So yes horrendous morning, they just cried and so I did too and all three of us just cried together! I was meeting some friends (who dont have kids) in town this pm and nearly didn't go cos I just couldn't face the screaming in public. But I went in the end cos I also couldn't face staying at home on my own with them and actually they were lovely! Lots of smiles and no crying! Think we all just needed to get out of house!

Dtg is being particularly difficult though, don't really know why.

What are people's thoughts on dream feed? Does it work? Does it have to be with a bottle or can you breast dream feed?

Meant to say so everyone is ill, dream. And that I hope they get better soon!! Sleep deprivation is really frying my brain.

Hello all
Sorry for going AWOL, have been distracted by the Behaviour & Weaning boards, my current obsessions! Thanks for checking up on me Dreaming!

Very mixed here. I've completely overbooked myself with work, so have been working halfway through the night then gambling that they'll sleep. Which sometimes they do (845 DS woke this morning! but then he is a bit ill) and sometimes they don't (DD, Tuesday night, AT ALL!). So all in all am a bit of a zombie really. They've both been shaking off bugs on and off for a few weeks now but whatever they've got at the minute is impressive, I got a 40 reading on the thermometer for the first time ever! Am getting less worried about them as they get more robust though.
Robust is definitely the word - DS can now climb the sofa. I realised this when I was playing with DD on the floor and he suddenly landed flat face first next to me, shook himself off and climbed back up to do it again! They are COVERED in bumps, bruises, scrapes and scratches and bite marks from each other. I'd best keep away from my HV for a while!
They are proper good value these days though. DH spent yesterday bath time teaching them a kind of jazz-hands encore move, which they now pull out at any opportunity!

Oh and welcome tot he newbies, sorry for everyone and every question I've missed. BUt just because I can see yours Nancy we used to do dream feeds after I'd dropped bfing and it worked well, because they can be half asleep for a bottle as it takes so little effort.

sorry all for not posting sooner have been trying to get a quick second for days now but it's not been happening. Though i did manage to write a nice long post yesterday that just vanished .

Anyway just to be quick then.

dream yes he is walking a fair few steps now but is teething so same little personailty. He didn't even roll over until about 7 months whereas dt2 rolled at 4 plus he didn't crawl until about 9 1/2 months so it really does prove that they all get there at their own pace in the end! Sorry to hear your dc's are all ill I can empathise Christmas was a downer for many many people that I know (including us with lurgy too).

nancy sorry to hear you feel so isolated. If it helps I think that more than one baby is isolating anyway wherever you are as it takes ages to get anywhere or anything done. I was so so lonely in the first few weeks I cried constantly but of course it does help having family and friends close by. You sound like a strong lady though and will be fine though I know it doesn't feel like it now. I still get lonely/bored on my days off work as everyone else is in work. I often wish the dts could talk as I think therein lies the problem-far too much baby talk!

claire it sounds as if things are improving for you thankfully! Fingers crossed for that.

To all those doing sleep training well done and good luck it is hard I've found it so hard at times hence my meltdown a few weeks (days?) ago but am ok about things now. We had a few great nights, if you don't include the hysterical laughter at 2am from the boys room loud loud laughter. Last two have been very bad though with little sleep but they are both teething now so not really doing cc. We've cut out the night feeds for a bit though. I would always jam a milk in their mouths if they woke in the night but tbh it wouldn't settle them anyway and I just don't think they were that hungry. Now I give them water if they seem to be looking for it and it's exactly the same scenario so I'm only going to be giving milk if I genuinely think they want it (i.e if my brain allows me to work it out at 3am). This doesn't make sense does it? Babies don't make sense to me!

Oh and twin we've always had a very loose routine the dts just settled into one which changed often anyway. You have a routine it's the one you just told us about! Before Christmas the dts would sleep 1 1/2 hours in am and 1hour in om in cots, but it's all gone to pot now. Am always out on my days off as need to get things done so they sleep all over the place and everywhere. Rod for my own back though-put them in cots for nap Friday for first timw in...erm..weeks. BIG FAIL! Oh well.

happy sunday everyone

thanks mine i realised once id written it down that we do things the same way the majority of the time but i change it if i need to!! i would like to start getting the dts to go to sleep unswaddled in their cots but im also sleep training my ds2 as i used to sit with him whilst he went to sleep, were 11 days in of him going to sleep by himself and hes doing fantastically were working on a 30 day reward chart and the end goal is a day at the seaside......it will be a cold day lol but will be worth it as he is now sleeping loads better and not waking up now..

Hope your dts are getting better dream

Hello to everyone else hope your having a lovely January

Nancy croup is an infection of throat and larynx, where it all gets really inflamed and they have stridor- which is a loud, effortful kind of gasp as they breathe in. DT2 was miles worse so had the whacking great dose of steroids but improved quickly after that. Now they're just bunged up and coughing their guts up :(

mines sleep training is so hard, having started and failed. Well done you for sticking with it . Maybe my active DT1 will crawl then, but he's just obsessed with walking round holding hands... Like DD, who didn't crawl...

Crying, later guys!

very quick message, as I have all kids at home (snow day here), but after an awful weekend when I was mostly on my own as dh worked throughout , dtg went to sleep without breafeeding last night (even though it took 3 attempts!), I rocked her to sleep and slept til, wait.... 7 AM!!!

I was still up 3 times with dtb,who I think is teething, but still, it is, to quote redenellie fucking amazing!!

Right now I know, I have jinxed myself and it will never ever happen again , but I just had to share! Hang on in there dream there is hope!

Hope you are all having a good day!

Hi everyone!
Croup sounds nasty dream, glad the steroids have worked. Hope all better soon!

Thanks mines, it's nice to know in not the only one finding it difficult. Had a nice weekend so feeling better about things.

Dtg is still bring v whingey though, I don't know why. Thank god dtb is the most smiley placid little thing otherwise I think I would have tipped over the edge! Dtg woke every 1 and a half hours last night and dtb woke three times, was horrendous. Is there a growth spurt at 4 months? They are feeding constantly! Slightly depressing as I thought the constant feeding had stopped!

Oh Claire just seem your measage, fucking amazing indeed!!!!! Yay dtg!!

Sounds like you're doing great on your own, I think your dh needs to treat you to some serious pampering some time v soon!

It's gonna snow here thus week too, hoping not to get stuck in. The only good thing would be if dp couldn't get to work

Whoo hoo Claire! Although it won't always be plain sailing, you've cracked the hardest part.

Sorry your lot are ill dream.

Nothing more to add. Hellos all around.

You lot have all gone quiet!!

Still ill here. Though today DT2 and DD miles better. I am like the walking dead and look it. Seeing every hour of the night...

My career break has been declined and i am due back on the 13th February. Errr, panic panic panic!! Met a lovely girl today, a nursery nurse who might be prepared to quit her nursery job. She's vair young though, 21. But seems kind, responsible and was nice with the children so think we'll take the plunge as there's so little time, unless I resign.

Have you started your job yet red? How's it going?

Totally agree mines two is just logistically much more challenging, and therefore isolating. I'm already wondering how we'll cope when, for example, both boys are walking but need loads of supervision as they've no sense, plus my DD who is clumsy and accident prone/ needs a lot of help in a playground/ park/ duck feeding. I guess for parks and duck feeding reins are the answer... but with one toddler and one baby, you'd just pick one up and leg it to avert a crisis at the swings for example. Or a bigger age gap you'd only need to stick close to the baby. How you manage with 2+ 2 year old I don't know?! Yours are doing so well. Mine are 9.5 months and no sign of any crawling, still... Eeek, 11 months and walking (like my DD) but x2, Blimey, good luck baby chasing!! My DD was so much more content once she was independently walking though.

Nancy I think feeding was still a constant thing at 4 months for me, 6 months it did really start settling and being a doddle though. You're doing fantastically. Can't get my head round antisocial French mums. Incidentally though one of my best mummy friends I met at a baby group when DD was 12 weeks old and i thought no, we'll never be close (she was talking about cc where I was soooo pfb and can't abide crying, certainly not that young) . However she's actually a wonderful mum, matter of fact but very loving with her three girls and we now see each other a lot, so fx for one of the mums from baby massage turning out to be lovely for you. Company improves most things :)

How did I not mention- amazing Claire, wonderful news, I'm delighted for you and little E. I'm very jealous too and not hopeful for my DT1 though as he does self settle well every evening, its 9pm on the shit hits the fan

Wow fab work clare.... how has it been since?
Glad at least two out of three are feeling better dream. But boo re work. What do you think you are going to do? Go back and have a child minder? I am back to work in a couple of weeks and the boys will be joining dd at nursery for the three days a week i work. Every penny of my wage on child care but hey ho.

Red have you started work? How is the nanny going?

Guess what? dt 1 woke all night last nightdid not wake until 7am! BUT he is poorly so that was probaprobably why. However both are sleeping better and started putting them on their tummies and that seems to help. .. watch this space!

Dt1 been back in hospital this week for a few daya... bad chest again.

Bugger got to go! !

Sorry about that. .. had to be sociable to dh!

Me and the children went to stay with my parents for a few days. All was going well until dt1 got all chesty and weezy again and after a trip to a gp we ended up at a&e. Only in a couple of days and he now has an inhaler to use whenever his chest gets tight. Works well so fingers crossed we can manage it and keep him healthy.

My poor parents had dd and dt2 to look aftet while I was in hospital. ... an eye opener for them I think! !!

Night Time update... neither slept through last night (surpr)

Ooo what happened there?!

... surprise surprise. BUT things are getting better with only a few disturbances and one feed each. Believe me that is good for the boys! !

Hello to everyone , will try tp catch up on everyone else on here so I can be less selfish with my posts!

Enjoy the snow!

Sorry. .. one more thing to add. .dream my dts are 8.5 months old amd can sit up fairly well but can not roll over and definitely not crawl. They can weight bare on their legs if I am holding their hands but nowhere near being able to pull themselves up and cruise. I was worried but I am not now as they are happy and I know they will get there eventually. And their size means there is a lot of weight foe them to kove around! so dont worry about lack od crawling with yours... like you said they might just go straight to walking and then you will wish they would stay still!

I hope everyone is enjoying the snow.

I wanted to ask about baby led weaning. Did anyone do it with their DTs? Mine were 6 weeks early. Do you think I can start at the recommended 24 weeks or should I wait nearer 30 weeks?

Any tips?

Omg bigboobs, that's awful!! Your poor DT1. I must stop complaining about illnesses that do not require hospital treatment... Suppose it was almost a good thing you were with your parents so you did at least have childcare for your DD and DT2. But this winter is not being kind.

I am going to try going back. It's still 12 months til DD gets any childcare vouchers though, if she still gets them once she's 3. Bet they change it by then to something worse for us. We are going to go for a nanny and make a loss of about £2.5-3000 a year, but that's actually better than nursery. Plus I feel happier with a nanny and tis cheap up north, she was prepared to do it for £6.90 an hour which seemed like slave labour to me so we've offered her a bit more to tempt her away from her nursery job. :)
However as I'm seeing every hour of the night, with poorly DT1 up coughing, spluttering, panting, (temp over 39, again) til nearly 4am, then slept nearly an hour, more comforting, then 2.5 hours I genuinely feel too exhausted to go back unless i start getting some sleep. Going to take on the nanny but i may end up seeing if I can be signed off sick if they won't give me any unpaid leave extra. sleep still awful here even at the best of times.

garden, twelve had prem twins and I remember her saying that its not to do with how early they are because its about how mature their gut is, so if they're prem, they've still been feeding through their tummies not their umbilical cord so their prematurity doesn't affect weaning. That's a really terrible long winded way of explaining, hope it makes sense. we are doing blw with one as he spoon refuses and mixed with the other. Tbh I much prefer the mixed feeding, he gets a much better balance and more protein than his brother.

Best go, just rocked babies to sleep in their buggy but need to see what ominously quiet toddler up to...

Oh, and thanks for the reassurance bigboobs, one of mine is a really good roller (in fact fell out of bed the other day when I was exhausted, fell asleep and let go off him ) the other can just about roll, but i worry more as DD is 'clumsy', not good coordination, and behind with speech and some motor skills and she's 28 months now, and also skipped crawling. Just hoping not to have the extra work/worry of more poorly coordinated children!! She's had/has some terrible falls and scarred her head badly not helped by shit glueing in a&e ,broken teeth twice etc. She is getting there though...

bigboobs and dream - DT1 can now crawl, pull himself up to standing and kneel on his own (just about). DT2 can't do nowt! He's hilarious. He sits there like a big plum, falls over onto the floor then wails because he can't move. He's been like that since he was 5 months old. No improvement. HOWEVER, he did actually definitley say 'banana' and has said it a few times, all in reference to actual bananas and when I say banana he gets totally over excited. So I have one healthy moving non-talking twin and one allergy ridden, non-moving chatty twin.

garden - I'm not sure what the advice is with premature babies, but I'd always go with your gut feeling. Can they sit up? Can they pick things up with their hands? Can they chew (even with no teeth)? My two were only on mush for about a month and a bit then both totally refused to be spoon fed so they have eaten what we have for ages. It's funny, as these are my second lot of children I'm so much more about whatever's easiest. And them feeding themselves, however messy it is, is much much better. Don't freak out if they cough/choke a little. It's just them learning how to do that - their choke reflex is, thankfully, very effective. Good luck!

Other than that, the nanny is going great (like dream, we're currently breaking even/slightly losing money, but it'll be worth it long term and I'm REALLY enjoying it). I had a bit of a cry the first day, as I really missed all of them (psycho), but today it's been fine. I'm actually on my computer upstairs. It's just amazing to me that someone else will come to my house and do all the crap that I have to do. And the kids like her. There's been a small amount of complaint from DD, but not surprising - she's had me to herself for 3 years, it'll be hard for her to let go. Speaking of which, I'm trying to find a play group for her for September just so she gets some socialising before school...it's not that long away, eek.

Oh and dream, I wouldn't worry about having no sleep and working. It's a 100 times easier than having no sleep and looking after 3 little uns! I am not even joking. I had lunch with DH today. With. No. Children. AMAZING.

Hi garden, just seen your question. How old are yours now? And do you have follow-up care from a paediatrican?

Mine were 10 weeks early, which is quite significant, and we have regular follow-ups. Their doctor said we should wean at 6 months actual, not corrected, just as Dream says. They really surprised me actually because they looked no where near ready - not sitting unsupported, not picking things up etc - but once I showed them food they wolfed it down! So for us weaning went really slowly - ages on really soft purees, then gradually introducing more flavours and textures.

We had to start in an upright-ish bouncy chair, then in bumbos, then highchairs, but only certain ones - we had IKEA Antilop with the inflatable inserts, but rolled up towels etc would still be good. I remember in June, so they were 10 mo, we went on holiday and couldn't use the wooden high chairs in the hotel at all and had to run out to Argos to buy some!

They were still only just beginning to pick things up around then too - once they were in high chairs I'd always put something on their trays, but they'd just sniff at it imperiously! Within a few weeks it had clicked and they could happily munch through some finger foods, but tbh some textures are still quite challenging. Our doc says that's quite common with premmies, but it could just be that DS is a fussy so-and-so!

NOt trying to put you off, by all means try BLW and I hope you have a lot more success in the early days than I did, but don't lose heart if they don't seem to be going for it. DS's appetite was so far ahead of his motor skills I think it would have been really cruel to persevere - he clearly wanted food, but he wanted me to shovel it in as fast as I could!

Thanks for the advice everyone, I do appreciate it :)

Twelve, I didn't think about the fact that their hunger may be stronger than their motor skills. Definitely something to think more about. They are only 16 weeks so a while yet but I want to give these things some thought and how it will fit in with me going back to work etc. They aren't seeing a pediatrician.

You have all given me a lot to think about. Thanks again.

Totally agree about the hunger vs motor skills. Same for my DT2. Even now what he gets in.himself is not enough, he gets frustrated and starts crying, so stops trying to feed himself and just gets worked up. If i do some spoon stuff so he's had about half or more, he will happily play with finger food and have a much better go at eating it. DT1 does not want a spoon, it'd be terrible to try and force him but he's my rolling baby with way, way better motor skills. Even more relevant with ex premature babies too.