Under 1s twin post-natal group? Should we have one? Who's in?!

[PeelingmyselfofftheCeiling]

The antenatal group is nearly full, any graduates fancy joining forces to compare

bigboobs, I know exactly what you mean about inlaws. Mine were here the day we came home from hospital and on and off for the first 6 weeks. One of their visits lasted 10 days! All they wanted to do was play, cuddle, feed babies, arranged loads of visitors including some at 10am on a Sunday morning !!! Put pressure on me to express so their other gc's could give a bottle!! I was do relieved when they left me to it and had my first day alone, could stay in pjs all day and bf without being watched!

I mix feed too. Am impressed you express 4 times a day, that is committed! We found that by doing big ff for the 7pm and 11pm feeds they seemed to be settled better, and then during the night we used smaller bottles of ebm, as it is less filling and means they don't get used to big meals during the night. It seems to have worked for us.

bigboobs - bath and bedtime routine? Me? Don't know what gave you that idea!!! Nooooooo... the twins go to bed anywhere between 8 and 11pm, depending on when they feed/how unsettled they are/whether I'm on my own or not/whether I have the energy/ whether I escape from the house or not!

As for baths, well... they've not actually had baths yet.

red You're prob right, a calmer mother makes for calmer babies! Sad at your MIL, and yours ceeveebee, I've had a few issues with MIL but never anything major and certainly not being a nuisance in any way :(

Found you! Catch up and post tomorrow x

lemele, you must have sounded organised and 'routine like' in your post! ;-)

well a better nights sleep for me last night as dd had temp (seems fine today) so I slept in my bed with her and dh slept on blow up bed in babies room- lots of sleep for me but none for him! I will pay for it later cos he will be mega grumpy and I will never here the end of it!

PIL go this morn thank god. so will just have all the towels and bed sheets to wash then back to normal.

mega poos from both babes yesterday so things are obviously working their way through! never been so pleased to see poo.

Thanks for all words of solidarity - helps more than you could know.

bigboobs glad to hear everything's working bowel-wise, I always dread it when they go a few days without poo as I know the next one will be massive and normally at the worst possible time!!
why do I find sharing my home and family so hard?! I am just like you ans often wonder was is wrong with me!! I can't even complain I don't get help as my mil is more than willing, but then she tends to take over the house and behaves as if it is hers and I can't stand it! I am slightly better with my mum but she can get on my nerves too. I think I am just weird. And dh doesn't get me at all on this front so if I say I am tired his standard answer is "why don't you get my/your mum to come and help?" aargh

oh and regarding the unsettled evenings, youc an find loads of posts and a thread form on that one! It sounds as if it is just normal for lots of babies. My theory is that they are quite tired by then by all the stimulation, sounds, lights etc that they were not used to and this makes them exetremely cranky. Anyway it does get better, slowly... mine are now 14 weeks and last night dtg slept from 7pm (hurrah) to 1am and then woke at 7am again! Dtb still wouldn't sleep til 9.30pm (as he fell asleep after his bath as I was bathing his sister, grr then he was neither hungry nor tired and was happy to lie on breastfeeing cushion on sofa with me and dd2 - at least he wasn't crying), and the he woke at 3am, s still 2 interruptions for me, I just can't bring myself to wake them both up, I am such a wally!

It's just horrible while it lasts and so much more difficult with twins (and more so if you have another child or two)

and everything rebnellie said, big checks in marker pen from me too!

tiggersreturn well done for getting nanny sorted. and youa re right, work sounds strangely appealing at the moment...

dream yes I am still giving dtb infacol when I remember which is not often tbbh but tbh I do not think he needs it that much anymore, but it does make a difference to ho quickly he gets winded, so still useful when I remember that is.

uhoh they're crying now, need to go...

Thabks claire - and you are not weird, unless I am weird as well! I have just left the house leaving PIL (who we see about 3 times a year) telling dh he has put dds milk in the wrong cup as she likes the blue one wtf!! And they keep picking the boys up and disturbing them and using the kitchen and bathroom - ha ha, so I am a little unreasonable! I am very tired you know!

Hello everyone, just popping in to say hi - have been ridiculously busy, FIL to stay, then my mum, sorting out going back to work (yuck, start on 6th august!), and generally ridiculously busy.

Haven't caught up with all the posts properly but those of you with the littlies when you look back it is all a blur, that period passes so quickly in hindsight (even though its bloody hard work in the middle of it).

All good here, both girls have two teeth and enjoying their food. Sleep was a bit disrupted with the teeth but calpol helped them and they are back o sleeping through. I can't believe they are nearly ten months old!

at my spelling...sorry wrote in a rush!
Hope you managed to understand what I was trying to say bigboobs!

Right, I'm in the club for not wanting to share my house with other people! Sign me up.

tiggers, glad you got a nanny sorted. That must be a really difficult one - did you know what you were looking for and have lots of questions sorted? I'd be totally useless at that tbh...am interested how you did it. Work does sound appealing, but I don't have a job currently to go back to. However, I'm hoping to pick up freelance stuff when I get back to the UK - although that is a complete hassle for working out child care. I'm much less precious this time round about making time for me...with DD I was with her 24/7 which was great, but I am starting to get itchy feet.

Hey silver, sorry you're not looking forward to work - are you fulltime or going back part time? The baby stage does go by so quickly doesn't it? I'm sure DD's first two months of life seemed to last an eternity - the boys seem to have got there while I turned my back for a minute.

bigboobs, routine?! Me?! You're joking!!! I an insisting on bathing the dts when DD is bathed every night for my sanity to convince myself I'm doing something to get a routine going. They have never 'gone to bed' as such. I feed or listen to them scream while we try to comfort them until either they fall asleep on the boobs and I slide them onto the sofa and dh sits with them n watches tv or sleeps on the other sofa til they wake and i dive into bed for what is often my only block of sleep in the night that isn't dozing with one or both on my chest.

A lactation consultant visited me yesterday after I rang for bf support and i feel a bit reassured. She agrees my boys are very colicky. We have about 4-5 hours crying a day, sometimes more. Every evening and usually either morning or afternoon too- so far not all day, dread to think of that happening. She had some advice but a bit contradictory. She has told me not to feed them more often thsn every two hours, as more than that is snacking not feeding as such. She said often the baby is swapped to the other breast too soon so too much 'foremilk' which is calorie low, lactose high = more windy, more colicky = cry more = mother feeds them more in the colic cycle. Clearly that's not a twin mum problem, I've got a baby in each boob every time, but the rest sounded about right. She also said to feed at early feeding cues though. And mine give those constantly- lip licking, rooting etc etc, so how I'm meant to get them to.go longer I don't know. Plus I tried it today, buggied them to stretch out feeds after ages and ages of feed/ scream after i lost hope of comforting them without milk, they stayed asleep 2.5 hours (!!!) woke, big feed, and colic screaming again straight away. ARGH!!!

So impressed you're expressing 4 times a day bigboobs I did three today so dh could give a bottle of ebm for me and it was SO hard to fit it in.

Claire I spend so much time settling babies I still can't ever face waking them at night. That's me, you and bb3 who don't then. Phew. Not just me :)

Good to hear girls ok silver, I dreaded going back after DD too so sympathize & couldn't face it to the degree I went back 14 weeks pg with the twins

House sharing hatred- here here! I am hating having the nanny on Wed and Fri being around all the time, asking me things, not doing things exactly as i would but mostly just being there. I'd rather do it all myself, but accept we wouldn't get out and do what we are doing now and if she calms/ jigs/ changes the dts I get to spend time with DD with less guilt. But agree with the lack of sufficient 1:1 all round, no sleeping til middle of night, PIL annoyance and everything else you and rednellie said bigboobs. Very reassuring to hear we're all feeling the same

Rednellie, I knew what hours I needed and the fact that I wanted someone with experience of babies and older kids. Other than that no fixed requirements. I found some good questions on line and worked around those and then invited some of them back to meet the dc and observed how they got on. It has taken ages

Hi all! No real excuse for not posting seeing as we've been quite house-bound here: both babies have been producing RIVERS of snot so haven't been going to any groups, and I've crocked my back and one foot, so can't even put htem in the buggy and stomp around the lanes as per usual. Have so so much to do before returning to work and a bit scared into inactivity!

Also weaning just seems to produce an ENDLESS cycle of feeding - it's like the bad old days when boob + bottle took 2 hours every 4 hours. Feels like just when you finish one thing there's another type of food to be produced... and the mess, oh the mess! Am so fed up of everything being dyed bright orange!

Tigger well done on sorting a nanny, I need to have another crack at child care. We are half sorted but I am freelance so very hard to judge what hours we need and the nursery I was hoping to use have completely messed me about. Bit fed up as our current lady is brilliant and I don't want to have to pay more for someone less good! Silver I am NOT looking forward to it either. Rednellie how are you planning to manage freelancing?

Dream, stick with it! The bathtime routine will reap rewards, I promise you. Where did you find your consultant from? Do you feel mostly happy with their advice?
Do bear in mind they WILL grow out of colic. YOu won't notice it, but they will. Our Dtd was a freaking nightmare for evenings, but turned a corner without me noticing it and has been our better sleeper for months. WHat's more she's SO content, and if I can't go to her straight away just gurgles away to herself and plays with her hands. (Dts is a miniature Russell Brand, but we love him anyway)

And everyone with MIL issues, god I hear you! Ours was brilliant when our dts were in NICU and would let herself in to deal with the dog and other little jobs. Then once they came home and I was beached upstairs feeding she'd often do the same, which was kind of fine but she'd try and shout a conversation up the stairs and expect me to shout back while feeding! And then once I was downstairs more she'd still just wander in, which was a bit unsettling as you don't really bother feeding discretely if it's just you and the babies in your own living room! Drove me a bit mad. Think we've finally got to the stage where she's not in every 10 seconds, but she still thinks door knocking doesn't apply to her!

Claire, Lemele, Bigboobs, and everyone else I've missed here

hi Peeling, hope you are able to get out and about again soon - if youi are anything like me then a day without going out is a long long day!

Things are going ok here - of course I am knackered but for such young'uns I think they are doing quite well. Health Visitor came again yesterday and is still worried about twin1 - he has got back up to his birth weight but no more, does not drink as much as twin2 (who has put on half a pound on top of his birth weight) and he is also really mucousy still - with a horrible cough when he feeds :-( HV is coming back on Monday to see him again - really hope he picks up as I am getting a bit worried now. he seems happy enough but the couch/mucousy thing obviously bothers him and he feeds sooo slowly and it is a real struggle to get much of a feed in him. Although I am mixed feeding I am expressing so everything is in a bottle so I know exactly what they are having.

anyway, trying not to worry to much and enjoy them. DH first day back at work yesterday and everything went well with the boys BUT I had no time to myself as loads if people came to visit and they all stayed ages!!! nice to see people but I was really looking forward to having some time just with the boys, bath them etc and do loads of housework but only managed to do loads of washing which is now piled up all over the house! oh well - will try again today - only one visitor and apparently she is just 'popping in'....

How is everyone else getting on? Dream, how are you and your boys?

off to put the washing machine on for the hundreth time :-)

Bloody hell BB, the first few days without your dp are for wandering around the house in pjs in a mild air of panic, not for trying to do any housework, let alone loads, and entertain visitors, as eel as feeding and changing twins, and sortingbottles AND expressing are you superwoman?!

you haven't seen the state of the house ;-) and I am certainly not dressed yet! just to help ease me in to this new way of like, the cat has started weeing by the front door (the inside side of the front door!). Bloody stupid cat! he is obviously feeling the pressure too!

Hello all,

peeling, I hope your foot and back are better soon, both you need for twin-care. I totally agree about weaning, I found it horribly time consuming, messy, I stained everything- why is it all forms of orange puree won't wash out?! And i was ready to murder Annabel Karmel by the end for encouraging me to go to great lengths to produce sweet potato, pea and leak puree and the like- one of her fish recipes used about 6 pans!!. Plus, for all that effort (& DD did scoff it all) DD now eats fish fingers, baked beans, cheese on toast and cheese omlette. That's it. And those only if she feels like it... Really interesting that twinnies has one twin loving his food and one not interested in hers. I wonder if the size difference thing might have a lot to do with it

This week i managed to get my three out of the house by 9:40 by myself to playgroup once (a cheat in a way as dh managed to leave an hour later than usual for work so was at home til 8:30 and got DD dressed and put her in her highchair to start her breakfast) and this afternoon went ok too. Although they were both quite flukey as there wasn't all three screaming together I feel much better. I'm already wondering when we'll have a decent routine and can get rid of the extra help so i can have my house and children to myself

Speaking of which, very impressive coping bigboobs. In fact, you're way more than just coping! And my goodness, the laundry... Visitors often have a funny understanding of popping in too, don't they

In my news, still struggling with lots of crying here, though touch wood, DT1 seems to be improving. Today he had several periods of being awake and calm, which was fantastic. DT2 isn't though, poor little tike. He's cried a lot today. Last night they settled by 9:45, their earliest ever, and I feel much better and more positive for an hour or two less evening screaming/ cluster feeding. I hope this continues. The lactation consultant was nhs, through a sure start place. Her advice seemed sensible at the time, & all the typical colic features she discussed perfectly fit my boys, bar the swapping boob too often giving foremilk/lactose overload, but in hindsight the contradiction of get them to go longer between feeds and feed at early feeding signs is tricky... (& am I being thick, I take lip licking, general mouthing, rooting and crying not settled by the walk and jig-or anything else- as feeding signs, but I'm wondering if sometimes they're tiredness signs or something, or can they really be that hungry?!). Quite excited that its Friday so dh will give my expressed milk so I can go to bed. If i can ever get DT1 off the boob...

Hi to everyone else, this is a massive post as I'm just feeding, but on my phone.

Delighted to see this thread. We have twin boys nearly 11 months. My whole body aches when I get up in the morning, anyone else feel like they are being rebuilt as the bionic woman...
Dream I bathed the duo from 3 to 5 months then DT2 got a rash on his face which was much improved by not washing, now we go with a bath once a week makes things much easier and has not ruined the routine.
Peeling so feel for you, hope the full nights sleep was blissful and you're on the mend.

Hi pig! Come and tell us what happens after 8 months!

Hi Pig, welcome! My DTs are just 6 months. Last week DTS got a nasty red rash on neck, shoulders, legs. Doctor said its ecxema so we are only supposed to bath him no more than 3 times a week, use aqueous cream instead of soap and also prescribed him some cream, it's almost gone today already! I was worried about dropping the bath but they don't seem to have noticed!

DTD has finally starting eating 2 weeks after her brother! She seems to like porridge with mango or raspberry, and any yoghurt. Will be trying her with some veg tonight. DTS is eating everything and finishing off her portions too! Nappies are getting very interesting though.

Can I ask those who have gone through weaning how do you structure your days, at the moment I am just doing 2 meals and feel like I am constantly feeding. It goes like this:
7am bf
8am breakfast
9am bf to sleep
11am bf+ff
12pm sleep
3pm bf+ff
4pm tea
630pm ff and bed
How do I fit lunch in, do I try to do it immediately after 11am feed? They usually go to sleep so not sure if this would work. Or do you give 1/2 milk then solids? Confused!!!

They're more and more active, interact with each other passing things, smiling, laughing, playing, sharing looks and seem to be particularly chatty around 5pm. They can also get anywhere, over, round or under, the living room is now theirs. I haven't kept a log of exactly what happened when, all a bit of a blur but they both found a routine (ever evolving) around 7 months and I was more confident putting them down together.

I found the evenings much easier once they could sit up and move, practically they are just in my arms less which helps. I try to make things easy, not overcommitting myself, I still have days when we stay at home in pyjamas and avoid going to anything that involves messy play.

As they get more independent it just does get easier although I see they are starting to express their anger with all out sit down tantrums....

Thanks for welcome both. So weaning. At that point I was also going with two meals a day one at 7.45 and one at around 1.30. I then moved to 7.30, 11.00 and 3.00. I did find the whole thing a bit painful but they now eat more quickly (and can self feed a fair amount) and I'm better at it. I now do food at 7.30, 12.30 and 4.30.

Welcome pigcon, it's nice to hear what the future holds for us - our boys have just started really smiling which is lovely.

So weaning.....mmm...trying to remember. I 'think' after a few weeks one of the breastfeeds was dropped which left more room for meals, but I'm pretty sure it went something like

6am bf
7.30am breakfast
9.30am bf + sleep (if I was lucky)
11.30/12pm lunch
3pm bf
5pm supper
6pm bf

And actually that's still kind of the routine DD has now, except snacks have replaced the bfs. She did always manage to fit in more bfs than this shows and I would often bf her first before a meal so she'd still get that all important milk before stuffing herself with bananas.

I also second the idea of introducing as many finger foods as poss as the more they start to feed themselves (despite the mess) the easier it gets for you, over time. HTH

Hi Pigcon and welcome! I am a newby here myself as boys are only three weeks.

Ceeveebee, Can't remember weaning too much but I do remember that lunch was always hard to fit in as DD was always too sleepy (grumpy) to want tp eat anything - so I think 'lunch' ended up being ridiculously early for a while - but it all fitted in to place over time. And completely agree re finger foods and slef feeding - yes messy but worth it to see them feed themselves and not be so reliant on you.

wish I could go to bed NOW but still waiting for boys to stir for food... then will attempt to get them to settle in cot but this side of midnight/1am usually proves fruitless :-/

They are three weeks tomorrow and they still sleep ALL the time (apart from early part of night, but even then they sleep but just wont sleep where they are meant to and feed frequently). When will they start being more awake? I just can't remember!!

Health Visitor back tomorrow to have another look at twin1 and weigh him - I really hope he has put on weight. Twin2 who was lb lighter at birth now feels so much heavier and chunkier than his brother, so I am worried that Twin2 has just stayed at birth weight or even lost :-( we shall have to wait and see.

hope everyone has enjoyed their weekends - where is the bloody sunshine!

Thanks all. Will stick at it and try to replace the 11am ff with some food!

bigboobs I remember going to meet some friends for lunch from my twins antenatal group when mine were 3 weeks old, I told everyone that they just sleep all day and never cry for milk, I had to wake them to feed them haha how things change! I think mine were about 5/6 weeks before they woke naturally and cried for food.

Good luck with the weigh-in!

heeellooooo everyone!

Sorry for the lack of posting - life has been so hectic!! I have been back in work full time for the past 2 weeks and i mean FULL time - 6 and 7 day weeks .I'm feeling terribly guilty about not seeing my little girls :( Thankfully only two more weeks of madness and then am hoping to take 11 weeks off and not go back again (unless i do some random freelancing)until they are one! :)

only just scanned some of the posts - i've missed lots! Ceevee my girls have lunch after the 11 feed. They now have bottle at 11.15 120mls followed by lunch. this usually takes half hour max and the they head for nap at 12.30 (it used to be 12 but i gradually stretched them over a few weeks)

Dreaming i see you're still having a tough time, glad DT1 is improving anyway :)

... and talking about getting off the boob.... those of you who have bf before how did you do it? How did you stop the night feeding?I've got it down to morning, bedtime (if i'm home) and nighttime. By night feeding i mean they look for boob when they wake (they don't have soothers so i seem to have turned into one) they latch for 2mins and fall asleep immediately and for the past few months it's made life easier.......but now my babies are addicted and won't even go to DH and let him try to settle them back to sleep..... my night away with work was thwarted by Dt1s addiction - i did a 4hour return journey two and from work that day - exhausting!!

Welcome bigboobs and pigcon! :) and of course anyone else i've missed!

Hope all of you with the newborns are enjoying your little ones! The first weeks and months are crazy but so soon it gets much much easier :) Our girls are laughing, rolling, twisting and trying to crawl now! Everyday they seem to do something new and it's just such a delight!

ooohhh seems i've written an essay...oops! back to my glass of vino i go