I have become so frustrated with trying to make friends with other parents since my DS was born that I thought I would try and may be find some answers on this website.
DS is now 13 months old and despite numerous attempts to find friends, companions, coffee mates, etc. by various means (this website, other websites, toy libraries, NCT, etc) I have totally failed.
I am a very extroverted, happy, smiley individual with an absolutely adorable, gorgeous, smiley and happy 13 month old son. So what's wrong ?
Two recent experiences, I went to a baby birthday party at the invitation of a mother I had met through this website who had her own established mother & baby group - DH, DS and I arrived all happy and jolly thinking we would all have a good time. The hostess greets us, shows us the kitchen, says help yourself to drinks and that's that. She doesn't even bother to introduce us to her husband or parents, DH, DS and I are left sitting in a corner, no one talks to us, people stare at our baby, and that's that. We feel so uncomfortable we leave after 10 mins. flat.
Second example, I went to a local toy library, a well-known and popular one frequented by many local mums with babies and toddlers, no one talks to us, although I try to open up conversations with a few of the mothers, one mother nearly treads on DS's little fingers while he is crawling, and then looks down towards him in total horror as though it's his fault for getting in the way. DS tries to grab another mother's handbag from a chair (he does the same to my hand bag at home, loves to pull everything out and then put them back inside again). I stop son from grabbing woman's handbag and I look at her and say jokingly with a huge smile "he loves handbags" - she looks back at me with a horrid angry face as though DS has done something awful - he is only 13 months old for God's sake !
I have lived in the UK and another European country since 1977. I have lived in London for over 14 years. I have a British passport and so does DS. We are white caucasians (sorry to bring up the subject of race) and I have a "posh" British accent due to private education here in the UK. I live in an affluent part of London, i.e. I am just trying to say that physically and in other respects we do not stand out from our London neighbours.
But experiences like these since DS was born make me feel like an outcast. I have made two relatively good friendships with women from my ante natal clases, but due to travel distance I hardly ever see them now.
I am so unhappy, I keep planning to leave the UK for somewhere more child friendly. But DH has work commitments here and this fact stops us from leaving.
Does anyone else have similar experiences ??