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Timing of circumcision

317 replies

sunhat88 · 09/04/2017 09:10

Hi,

My baby boy is due soon and he will be circumcised. (Please no circumcision debate on this thread). Those of you who have had you baby boys circumcised... what is your opinion on the best age to have it done? Also what was your experience of their recovery?

Thank you Smile

OP posts:
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QuitMoaning · 10/04/2017 16:48

Why do various religions advocate it? Where is it written in the relevant holy scriptures to do this? I genuinely want to know as it baffles me.

Btw, numbers of people practicing something doesn't make it right. Millions of people were involved in the slave trade and I don't think anyone here agrees with slavery.

BertrandRussell · 10/04/2017 16:52

"No wonder so many children today are so entitled and precious when they are brought up with these kinds of attitudes."

What- the attitude that nobody has the right to perform non medically required surgery on them without their consent? Gosh- yes. Very precious and entitled!

sticklebrix · 10/04/2017 16:56

Entitled? And yet parents who circumcise feel fully entitled to remove a healthy, necessary part of their sons' genitals without consent.

GahBuggerit · 10/04/2017 16:57

I once ended a relationship with someone because they were circumcised. Our sex life was just dreadful, it took him forever to orgasm which often meant i was very uncomfortable and even in pain after a while. Shame as he was lovely but i just couldn't do it anymore. He blamed it on his circumcision and not surprisingly he didn't have a great relationship with his parents - his Dad for insisting his son "looked like him" (urgh wtaf!!) And his mum for not stopping his Dad. He wasn't even surprised when i finished it so i clearly wasn't the first :(

Protect your little babies from this, it's such a potentially life changing thing to impose on someone.

HappCatt · 10/04/2017 16:57

Once again I will ask why millions of men choose to have their sons circumcised if it is so awful and traumatic as you are all claiming?

Presumably the same reason that millions of women choose to have their daughters genitals mutilated. 🤷🏻‍♀️ I know FGM is a lot worse but I think the cultural pressure must be similar. It's tradition...it's our culture....everyone does it... it what our religion tells us to do ..... etc etc

Personally, I think the right age is when your child is old enough to make the decision themselves. I don't understand why parents feel they need to force babies to be circumcised surely it would be more meaningful if the child was old enough to decide for themselves. whats the hurry? I get that the OP is simpler for babies but there is actually nothing stopping an older child or young adult from not doing.....except of course their own free will.

BoboChic · 10/04/2017 17:04

GahBuggerit - I've had sex with several' circumcised men (including my DP) and several uncircumcised men. Circumcised men are far better lovers! There is a reason for circumcision Wink

GahBuggerit · 10/04/2017 17:12

Well yes he did overcompensate i suppose by being alright at other stuff (as have been my other conquests, good teacher i guess!). Shame for him though but who gives a shit eh?

There is only one reason for circumcision - to address a current medical need.

muhajaba · 10/04/2017 17:19

This is definitely the last time I come on mumsnet...the bigotry is grim. I don't think I'll be missed Grin
I lived until I was 10 in a country where FGM is performed on about 90% of girls, to compare it to male circumcision is ludicrous and irrational.
There are so many children in the world suffering real abuse, being bombed out of their homes, dying from starvation, sarin gas attacks etc. And you're all foaming at the mouth over a perfectly legal, very simple and widely practised little procedure- which is performed because people want the best for their children. This is the attitude I'm talking about, the one that says you are superior and we are barbaric, you are educated and know best, we are backwards and indoctrinated. It's pathetic and makes for a really dull debate.

CMamaof4 · 10/04/2017 17:25

Muhajaba
kindly fuck off then will you please Grin

BoneyBackJefferson · 10/04/2017 17:33

muhajaba

I think that you need to look in the mirror to see who is foaming.

ThoraGruntwhistle · 10/04/2017 17:37

It's not bigoted to ask why on earth anyone would think it's the 'best thing for their child' to cut part of their genitalia off at a young age, when they have no say in it and for no discernible reason. It really isn't.

brightspark2 · 10/04/2017 17:43

Muhajaba.
Break down the term.
Male? Yes
Genital? Yes
Mutilation? Yes
What's to disagree with? It is mutliating the genitalia of a male who can't defend himself. That's a simply as I can put it - and hygiene reasons cited from outdated and biased reports - again mostly religious bias as well - just doesn't fly in this day and age. My late husband was circumcised and disliked it for the reasons given upthread. My now partner isn't and is very clean. It's the 21st century and children should not be violated in this way.

GuinessPunch · 10/04/2017 17:59

They go on about it being a little piece of skin but if its so insignificant then why does it matter?

Why you would choose for your baby to be in pain is incomprehensible. They are babies and have no voice.

BWatchWatcher · 10/04/2017 18:01

Never is a good time to get your child circumcised.

GahBuggerit · 10/04/2017 18:31

I think I'd be tempted flounce too if i started to question my stance on something. It must be hard to question what you have been brought up, by men mostly i assume, to believe is right

Womble75 · 10/04/2017 18:38

Is it for cultural reasons? It's prevalent in my husbands culture and right from when I've found out I was expecting a boy I've put my foot down about it.
My children are raised with the knowledge of their heritage but there was no way on this earth I was consenting to this. It did cause a few ructions(thanks DH's family ) as all the males are. Honest to God I would have risked our marriage over this as I feel so strongly. I told him and his family if they wanted it then DH should have married someone from their culture.
To me it's abhorrent and no way I could put my son through it for no valid reason.
I've also been with both circumcised and non partners - the circumcised ones take an age to come and my DH has admitted he never could with some partners but never connected the two before now.
One of the arguments I got back from his family was it was unhygienic - I said luckily we have access to soap and water so don't see the issue personally Hmm
I believe both parents have to consent in this country - told DH over my dead cold body would I sign that form.

Instasista · 10/04/2017 19:14

I think muhajaba makes some good points in a very resilient calm manner and has very much held her own in this debate.

I do think a lot of the horror is cultural to the Uk. It is unusual to find an uncircumcised man in many other countries (particularly, say the US) and although rates may be falling there and there are a number of pressure groups popping up the influence is minimal.

You'll struggle to get a lot of people for whom it's the norm to understand your point and to be fair, if you were in say the US, is extremely unlikely you would hold the same the anti circumsion views you do here. Its not surprising that these debates go this way but I very much doubt it's influencing someone who intends to have their son "done" to change their mind.

AssassinatedBeauty · 10/04/2017 19:30

It's not just the UK. Very many European and Scandinavian countries have very low rates of circumcision.

I don't see how you can confidently predict that everyone here would be happily pro-circumcision if we were in a culture where it was more prevalent.

Instasista · 10/04/2017 19:39

Because so few people are in those countries are anti. And we in the U.K. (Or France Norway whatever Hmm) don't have better analytical skills or superior knowledge compared to people in say, the US. It's just cultural.

brightspark2 · 10/04/2017 19:43

Sigh. Maiming or beating children or women has nothing to do with culture - it's barbaric and horribly outdated. UK men in the 1950's were often circumcised. In 2017 we are more enlightened. Many overzealous religious patriarchal societies still support MGM - the US among them. Autonomy over one's body is a basic human right - unless there is a MEDICAL need it is abusive.

Instasista · 10/04/2017 19:52

You're rude and not very capable of debate.
Circumcision has nothing to do with beating or maiming women so no idea what you mean

And it's abusive in your view. Many, including The UK legal system, disagree with you

joystir59 · 10/04/2017 19:55

Circumcision for anything other than medical reasons is mutilation and should be banned.

AssassinatedBeauty · 10/04/2017 19:59

Just because something is legal doesn't make it right. Laws can be changed to reflect more enlightened understanding. Marital rape used to be legal until the mid 1990s in the U.K., that didn't mean it was morally right and acceptable up until that point.

BoneyBackJefferson · 10/04/2017 20:01

Instasista
You're rude and not very capable of debate.

I can see why you believe that muhajaba has been calm and resilient in this debate as you seem to like to throw insults around as well.

Instasista · 10/04/2017 20:09

Throwing insults? That was simply in response to the patronising sigh

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