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Funeral costs

77 replies

LML1989AL · 25/11/2025 14:03

My dad has been diagnosed with cancer (told on Friday, so all very fresh/overwhelming) we are still waiting for treatment options/prognosis, he’s seeing a specialist nurse & consultant on Thursday.

I have a complex relationship with my dad, so discussing this with him at this moment in time isn’t something I can do. I’m not saying I won’t discuss it with him, just looking for some advice.

I can’t help but thinking of worst case scenario. If that does occur I know my dad has no savings, rents his home & receives UC/PIP.

I’m on maternity leave (so our savings are needed for bills)

My question is & I'm aware this comes across as insensitive but how will he have a funeral? I’ve been googling & it appears you only get help with paying with funeral costs if you (the person organising the funeral) receives benefits. Unless I’m interpreting this wrong.

He has no siblings. My grandmother (his mother) is alive but she is in the same financial situation. I’m his only child (he separated from my mother 30 years ago) So there is no one else who could pay for a funeral.

I feel awful writing this. It’s just been on my mind & causing me anxiety on top of worrying about his health.

OP posts:
MellowPinkDeer · 26/11/2025 19:52

Turnerskies · 26/11/2025 19:29

Tessasanderson - Apologies but we seem to misunderstand each other.
You said "Yes of course i would pay for my own children. 100% without a second thought."
I paid for my son's funeral. He was in his 50s and I am in my 70s. Would you expect to pay for the funeral of your middle-aged child when you are elderly? I am not talking about someone with learning disabilities. I wasn't expecting to have to do that.

I’m so sorry for your loss x

Tessasanderson · 27/11/2025 11:08

Turnerskies · 26/11/2025 19:29

Tessasanderson - Apologies but we seem to misunderstand each other.
You said "Yes of course i would pay for my own children. 100% without a second thought."
I paid for my son's funeral. He was in his 50s and I am in my 70s. Would you expect to pay for the funeral of your middle-aged child when you are elderly? I am not talking about someone with learning disabilities. I wasn't expecting to have to do that.

Yes 100% if any child of mine, regardless of age needed a funeral paid for i wouldnt hesitate. I couldnt see any scenario i wouldnt cover it.

But i wouldnt expect that them to cover mine.

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