money help from bf (and dating while on uc)

[theworldisdoomed]

is help from a boyfriend allowed ? My rent isn’t fully covered and, including bills, I’m left with about an £800 shortfall. He doesn’t live with me — we’re not at that stage, and maybe won’t be until I’m back in work. It’s obviously difficult to start a relationship while on benefits, so I just want to understand what support is allowed.
and maybe hear some dating advice
thank you

Im 45. I apply for junior and even entry position in data sector. Im a bit too old for them. For other jobs, Im overqualified, or as they say they worry I would not stay etc.

I understand your need for a relationship but when you have only dated someone for 4 months it’s very early to expect to start living with each other or someone to pay your rent when they don’t live there. You sound vulnerable most people don’t have 800 of disposable income to pay rent to a landlord. Have you tried to get out of the fixed tennancy.

@theworldisdoomed - if he offers to help you financially and cover your £800 shortfall each month, what happens when you break up? How will you afford it then?

Or if he were to lose his job/income? You are essentially asking for a 5k gift even to see your lease out were you to accept you need to move somewhere cheaper. Are there really no temp jobs in the data sector?

Apply for any job, there are part time, Christmas temp jobs that are available at the moment. I just started working at one of the big supermarkets, early mornings (4am-8am) as an online shopper (picking orders for delivery). I haven't worked in almost 20 years, they barely ask any questions, they just need bodies for the Christmas rush. My interview as baout 10 minutes and they didn't even ask for my CV! I work three mornings a week, and after picking up just three extra shifts, I came home this month with £802. And that's in the north of England. Take anything to get you through this tenancy and then move somewhere much cheaper. Don't take the man's money, that's not a good way to go.

cant - slipped disc L4/L5.
i applied for basic admin, receptionist. even libraries want degrees. admissions in schools (no experience in face facing roles)
extras in movies. anything with quick payments.
im very hopeless atm

My partner and I are mid-late 40s. We have been together for several years. Not living together, not planning to. Relationships can work however you want them to, you can be together and have a great relationship and not share a flat.

Didn't you say you have 2 degrees??

But nothing related to your IT/data experience? Are you registered with agencies? I’m not sure why you are applying for school based roles with no experience and which will have a necessarily protracted recruitment process, including dbs checks.

I'm just here to ask where one gets papers to say they are "quirky"? :)

Moving out its not an option.
Sorry, but it is your ONLY option. Speak to your landlord. Tell him you have lost your job, can't afford the rent, and will be moving out.
What can he do? Threaten to sue you for the remaining months' rent? Not likely to happen at all. It would not be worth his time. He will just re-let the flat.
Even if he took you to court (very highly unlikely), the most the court can do is make you pay him a token amount while you are on UC, say £1 or £5 a week.
Don't be afraid, either of the landlord or the law.

You cannot stay in a flat that you cannot afford, especially as it seems unlikely that you will get another job soon.

The question is about money going into account and DWP.
Your boyfriend cannot pay you a regular amount into your account - DWP will consider this as income and reduce your UC.
Plus it would be a very bad idea to let yourself be so beholden to BF of only a few months. What if he turns nasty? What if he demands the money back, or demands you do something in return (criminal or sexual)? Just don't do it.

If your BF is a good person, the very MOST you should let him do is go shopping with you occasionally and pay for the groceries at the till.

But the short answer is that you have to move out of the flat.

OP You talk about yourself very negative way quote I’m hopeless.. what do your family think about all this? Your mum by lending you money has only enabled this situation to continue. I wish you luck but I don’t want to offer any advice as I’ve been accused of bashing you already.

Libraries want specific degrees in Librarianship. I would be very happy in a library.

Im 45. My last degree I completed 10 yrs ago. I compete with 20 yr olds, fresh out of school.
I dont drive (no licence, and best for other road users)

@EuclidianGeometryFan moving out is not an option that OP seems willing to consider. In fairness she would also struggle to find alternative accommodation while out of work, unless she found family or a bf to move in with. Shelter or CAB can give advice about the terms of the lease as there is often a way to break it, with notice and not pay once it is relet. OP there is no point paying premium rent in an area where you have no prospect of work. That is a luxury you cannot afford.

There’s one thing buying meals, drinks etc when going out. There’s another expecting to make the shortfall on rent and living expenses.

yes, including volunteering.
'another candidate whose experience more closely matches the day-to-day administrative and coordination needs of this role. ...
your strong analytical and technical background truly stood out, and we would be happy to keep your details on file for any future opportunities that might better align with your data and research expertise.'

Me too 😂

You could work on the tills, surely?

Have you applied for a supermarket job in the last few years? There's loads of applicants, they require online test, then s.t.a.r. interview where you have to provide examples of previous, specific experience, and you have to do manual labour for the job.

Not just sitting at a till. (Where twisting in your seat is required, and lifting)

That sounds more like it was an admin role rather than a data role. They won’t proactively come back though, you need to keep applying to jobs with a relevant focus and perhaps follow up with a phone call. You have n’t answered about registering for agency work.

Do you get PIP if you've got a physical disability and a diagnosed neurodivergent condition?
I get why you're asking but it would be completely insane of both of you for your brand new boyfriend to send you £800 a month. Mainly for you because it would look like you are being financially supported by him and your UC claim would be closed or reduced significantly.

If you want to live in London, you need a job. Quirks or not.🤷‍♀️

Lots of shops are advertising for Christmas vacancies locally? Have you considered these?

What about wfh jobs OP? Data entry? call centre type role?

This completely.