Both work and we claim UC but still can't afford to live.

[Mocha1]

We have 3 kids, 2 who aren't at school yet, my husband and I both work 30 hours a week for charities so not highly paid. We also have childcare for part of the week and then juggle the kids between us the rest of the time (We don't want to work more as we dont want the kids in fulltime childcare). We rent and down't own. We claim UC but we are still really struggling to make ends meet. We really try to live to a tight budget but I have no idea how to lower our expenses any more.

Am I missing something? Is this normal? does anyone have any tips for saving money/ making more income somehow? I feel a bit at a loss as we keep dipping into our savings for just day to day expenses and we're nearly at the end of those.

Our income at the moment (I'm on MAT leave) - £3980
Outgoings- £4250

Do these outgoings seem like a lot for a family of 5 living in the south west? I've been going over our budget and I have no idea how to save any more unless we literally never bought another birthday present or went to a soft play ever again.

That made me laugh … one of them kept pulling me over until I got used to it 🤣 was your comment supposed to offend me? 😆

I used to work in the charity sector and I loved it. When I moved in to the Private sector due to redundancy I was gobsmacked at how many more opportunities there were and much the pay improved, we have proper pay rises and bonuses. 5yrs on and my wages have doubled. I would advise one of you to do the same. You couldn't pay me to go back in to the charity sector.

35 hours a week is full time. Loads of people work 9-5 with an hour's lunch.

I do 35 hours a week and that’s considered full time. I’ve also done 42 hours a week as a full time job. It depends on where you work I think.

It's not a problem limited to the UK though. The whole of the western world is experiencing the same issue.

Surely if they worked full time the children would be in full time childcare and that would be subsidised by other tax payers as well?

I'm on the continent, and where I am, all people with dependents pay less income tax, which is another way to support the incomes of parents.

Some families surviving on that amount may be mortgage free or have a very cheap mortgage.

Would you be able to post your outgoings? Your household income looks decent to me and while your rent is high I would have thought you’d have enough left to live on.
How much do you pay for childcare?

Yes, I've worked 35 or 36 hours in many jobs. 9-5 office jobs.

Sure it is.

"One or both of you needs to work more and earn more money."

It's their only option and the sooner they come to terms with it, the better.

@Statsquestion1 don't have a spread sheet but -
Incomings - around £2k a month sometimes £2,200. OH wage.

We did rent at £600 but recently bought and mortgage is £400pcm.

Mortgage - £400
Council tax - £130
BB - £35
Gas and electricity- £120
Phones - £50 for both
Water - £54
Netflix and Disney etc - £22
Swim lessons £35
Car insurance and house insurance - £82

So £928 outings.
Left with £1,272. Sometimes a bit less.
We put everything into "pots"
Make 100/200 overpayment on mortgage
Put £50/100 each into DC savers and same for ours (depends if there's any birthdays or occasions that month).
Put into our life time isa.
Put £500 in the joint shopping account.
Then allocate spending money for tat.
The children's CB doesnt count towards our incomings as we keep that aside for their clubs, activities, clothes etc x

I'm referring to the lecture on the children.
I clearly stated that they need to earn more, possibly by working more.
The children already exist, so lectures won't help that situation now.

@Digdongdoo I've found it's hugely where you live in the UK that determines what you can do with your money x

Unless @Mocha1 intends to move abroad I'm not quite sure how this helps. The benefits system in the uk pays more if you have children and op is claiming what they're entitled to. They now need to consider either increasing income or reducing costs, as posts on mumsnet aren't likely to become the basis of government policy. We're already on our arse financially as a country and people are fed up with calls for more taxes for full time workers when people choose to go part time and are propped up by taxes.

Well to be honest no it wasn’t meant to offend you…I was being sarcastic. But on thinking about it you comparing your dogs to children is more offensive.

You really struggle to understand why people who are on their knees working full time and have DC in child care, feel bitter and unhappy that they are contributing for others who choose not to do the same? Empathy works both ways, I totally understand why Op doesn’t want to put her DC in FT childcare. I also totally understand why others are pissed off that this can be state funded choice.
If we all choose to do that, who, exactly, would pay for it?

Everyone saying 'shouldn't have had a 3rd child', well yes but that's somewhat irrelevant now as the child is already here and they can hardly put one back.

OP, your only options are to either cut your spending or increase your earnings. Ideally both. With both of you working part time there's plenty of opportunities to do this. DH and I used to work part time (30 hours a week) and when we had one child that was fine, but when we had our second we found it was unsustainable financially so we both increased our hours to full time. We work opposite shifts (DH does morning to early afternoons and I do late afternoon to evenings) so we don't need childcare. Yes it does mean DH and I hardly see each other during the week, but that's the sacrifices we had to make to ensure our children are supported financially.

You sound rather snobby about childcare. Many many parents have to use full time childcare. I doubt many particularly want to, but that's what they have to do.

My sister has one more child than me. He’s sixteen now. We had our first two at pretty much the same time then they had a third and I have to say it’s really impacted their lives financially in a way that we never predicted. We talk about it often. . Not that she regrets having three as she very much doesn’t but it has been quite interesting how much it made our lives diverge despite having similar family incomes.

Wow your bills are so cheap! Our council tax and utilities are double that! I won't even mention the mortgage 😅
Are your children very young? Because that food bill is teeny!
I'm impressed 👏

I’m guessing that when OP did her research she realised her family wouldn’t be much better off with an increased income if she or her partner worked full-time, not when she’s claiming benefits.

Apparently, Universal Credit is difficult to stay on long term, according to many on this website.

I have 3 children and even with a family income well above that it felt tight with two in childcare. Most of my friends staggered their kids and - yes - worked full time.

I think the reason you get such strong responses is that plenty of people are putting their kids in childcare a lot more than they want to pay inordinate amounts of tax that then go to subsidise the choices people like you make, choices they cannot afford to make themselves.

I can’t comment on your financial situation but I totally agree with you about not putting your children in childcare. My children were never in childcare as like you say research has shown that children benefit more from having a parent at home. I gave up a very well paid job when I had my children and we did struggle financially in the beginning but it was a sacrifice worth making. Children need time and I cannot fathom out how this can be achieved if both parents are working particularly full time . I’d say if both parents need to work, then you could argue can they really afford to have children.

Yes, they exist.

I suppose you can call having a third child a luxury whilst you're deciding whether or not to have one. But once they are here, feeding them becomes a necessity so you have to cut back on other luxuries.

If you have no other luxuries to cut back on, you made a very poor choice to have a third child.

But the OP and her husband do have other luxuries to cut back on. One major luxury, in fact. Which is choosing to work part time in a low paid sector doing jobs they enjoy but which don't pay the bills.

Being unnecessarily rude to others won't change your situation though.

They can't put N 3 back, but other people reading this thread might think about their future choices.

I'm sorry but unless your DH was high earner and you weren't on benefits, then working part time until Year 4 doesn't make you a role model either.

People need to live with consequences of their choices, otherwise there is no societal learning.