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Original poster

Please help - partner died no will

387 replies

TheAgileDuck · 06/01/2025 18:47

Hi All, I would really appreciate your help. My partner of 12 years died over Christmas. He was very ill and I was his carer (unofficially he didn’t claim carers allowance etc) We have lived together for 8 years in his fully paid for house. He has two children who he has not seen for 10 + years and other relatives still alive but again not spoken to in a very long time years and years.

he has died with no will. His family are asking me to leave the house I have called my home for 8 years as we were not married and I wasn’t paying any rent/maintenance officially. He always verbally promised me that I could stay in the house if he passed away until I died or if I choose to leave 30% of the value of house and rest to his children. However it turns out there is no will so none of the above is official.

do I have any right to stay in the house? Please note I am not on bills. I also have no other savings, so if I was kicked out I would effectively be made homeless. I haven’t worked in 8 years as his health was extremely poor and I looked after him and he had enough money to cover all bills.

I am not after any money from his bank accounts, his expensive jewellery and watches just a small bit of what was promised to me for so long. I have no money saved so getting a solicitor I think will be last resort but guessing it might have to be done.

I am totally devastated by his loss but also now by this situation which has come as such a shock after thinking I had some safety for my future.

please help if anyone has any advice

many thanks

OP posts:
Durrbraino · 06/01/2025 19:02

You need to see a solicitor, op. Some bad advice on this thread.

As you were financially dependent on him you may have a claim under the Inheritance (Provision for Family and Dependants) Act 1975. This would need to be ordered by the court.

Original poster
TheAgileDuck · 06/01/2025 19:04

Barrenfieldoffucks · 06/01/2025 18:58

Ah, what a way to compound a difficult time, I'm sorry for your loss.

Have you been his carer throughout or have you been able to work etc? Was it a long illness?

I was a secondary school teacher for 20 years. 8 years ago when his illness got worse I left work and looked after him. He had a very good job and worked hard his whole working life so had plenty of savings and the ability to provide for me. I am now 63 so will look at re entering the workplace again.

OP posts:
Hdjdb42 · 06/01/2025 19:04

Honestly I'd go and see a solicitor and see. But without a will, the estate would normally go to his next of kin, so his children. It's a shame he didn't prepare a will, he left you completely unprotected.

Spirallingdownwards · 06/01/2025 19:07

You have a claim as a dependent of his and he has not made provision for you. I am glad to see another solicitor is going to contact you and will be able to point you in the right direction.

Do not leave and get a solicitor.

2025uk · 06/01/2025 19:07

Did you really think there was a will op or did he talk in the abstract about it? How do his family know there was no will so soon?

Original poster
TheAgileDuck · 06/01/2025 19:07

Hdjdb42 · 06/01/2025 19:04

Honestly I'd go and see a solicitor and see. But without a will, the estate would normally go to his next of kin, so his children. It's a shame he didn't prepare a will, he left you completely unprotected.

I know I am devastated. He told me numerous times he had a will in place but turns out he didn’t. I don’t know why he lied to me, we had a great relationship even through the tough times of his illness. I never want to take things from his children that’s not what person I am, I just wanted a fair and reasonable amount which he has so promised. If I thought he hadn’t prepared I would never have left work and been financially dependent on him.

OP posts:
StMarie4me · 06/01/2025 19:08

Attention you absolutely sure there's no will?

StMarie4me · 06/01/2025 19:08

Are you*

stichguru · 06/01/2025 19:09

TheAgileDuck · 06/01/2025 19:04

I was a secondary school teacher for 20 years. 8 years ago when his illness got worse I left work and looked after him. He had a very good job and worked hard his whole working life so had plenty of savings and the ability to provide for me. I am now 63 so will look at re entering the workplace again.

Show quote history

I'm so so sorry you are in this position OP. Have you checked everywhere he might have put a will? Unless his illness meant he lost mental capacity very very quickly/early, it seems very strange that someone with a deteriorating illness who was devoted to a partner, not married to them, wouldn't leave a will.

nopenotplaying · 06/01/2025 19:09

Firstly I'm sorry for your loss. I don't know if this is of any help at all? As others have suggested it's probably good to speak to a solicitor x

www.familylawpartners.co.uk/blog/what-is-a-common-law-partner-entitled-to-in-the-uk

2025willbemytime · 06/01/2025 19:10

Could you ring round local solicitors to ask if they have his will?

Original poster
TheAgileDuck · 06/01/2025 19:10

Soontobe60 · 06/01/2025 18:56

What makes you think they're awful? You don’t know why he didn't have any contact with his children, how he managed to have his own house or why the OP didnt have a home of her own from before they met.

Show quote history

I never owned a home myself always privately rented as I couldn’t afford London prices where I lived.

The family failings out I think were a mixture of everyone being in the wrong if I am honest.

he owned his own home as he worked, he bought a house in the north and I relocated with him 8 years ago.

OP posts:
CombatBarbie · 06/01/2025 19:11

Quitelikeit · 06/01/2025 18:53

Did he have anything at all in writing to you that you were allowed to remain in the house?

You need legal advice asap

This.....

curious79 · 06/01/2025 19:11

You officially count under the law as a 'dependent co-habitee', particularly given you were living there and not paying bills. I am certain of this legal standpoint given some issues we had to deal with around someone

They CANNOT just chuck you out (but under no circumstances leave before anything is settled) and make you homeless. The estate will need to make some reasonable provision for you.

Good luck! And get decent legal advice, not some crap high street solicitor, more a larger city based firm with a specialist in wills. You will need to pay up for some initial advice

UpUpUpU · 06/01/2025 19:11

Op, I am very sorry for your loss.

How do you know there is no will?
I do find it odd that a man so seriously unwell never made a will and gave you instructions on where it was, especially when estranged from his wider family. It sounds a bit suspect to me.

I hope you can get some advice as he has really left you in a poor situation.

curious79 · 06/01/2025 19:12

a will has to be officially lodged / recorded - there could be some way of a solicitor tracing it

Original poster
TheAgileDuck · 06/01/2025 19:12

CombatBarbie · 06/01/2025 19:11

This.....

Show quote history

I am going to go through all paper work and emails etc one last time to see.

OP posts:
Saturdayssandwichsociety · 06/01/2025 19:12

TheAgileDuck · 06/01/2025 19:04

I was a secondary school teacher for 20 years. 8 years ago when his illness got worse I left work and looked after him. He had a very good job and worked hard his whole working life so had plenty of savings and the ability to provide for me. I am now 63 so will look at re entering the workplace again.

Show quote history

OP how did you accrue no assets of your own while working as a teacher for 20 years? Someone who's always worked full time right into their 50's would usually have managed to accrue some assets??

stayathomegardener · 06/01/2025 19:12

I am so sorry for your loss.

I know you are grieving but please go through all the paperwork in the house.

ViolinsPlayGentlyOn · 06/01/2025 19:12

You might be able to make a claim on the estate even if he didn’t leave a will, but you definitely need proper legal advice not Mumsnet.

Mumoftwoboysaged4and5 · 06/01/2025 19:13

The solicitor will be able to trace a Will. As previous posters have said, you do have rights as a dependent under the 1975 Act.

Original poster
TheAgileDuck · 06/01/2025 19:14

Because I was going through emails on his phone and found one sent last July to a friend where he said he needs to sort a will out but hasn’t yet. He lied to me and told me there was a will. I have no idea why I am at a complete loss. My only thought is that he was so afraid of dying, it severely affected his mental health and didn’t want to believe it was happening.

OP posts:
BellissimoGecko · 06/01/2025 19:15

I'm very sorry for your loss.

Your partner has totally let you down, though: you gave up work and moved to care for him and he lied to you about his will! Seriously, what a horrible thing to do.

You need good legal advice.

curious79 · 06/01/2025 19:15

Add this to your list of issues to take to a solicitor. If you create a list you will use their very expensive time efficiently. Don't allow them to watch you cry and be upset when on their clock - you'll be charged for the privilege - instead use solicitor time for practical, logical legal / factual issues:

  • he said he had a will - can e find out where it was lodged using any kind of search?
  • I believe I am a dependent co-habitee - what can I reasonably expect by way of provision particularly given I have been his career and long term partner and he has been estranged from his family?
  • am I allowed to stay in the house for the interim?
etc
Frazzlededucator · 06/01/2025 19:15

So sorry for your loss.

How old are you? I don't think you can make someone over 60 homeless. I don't think this means you can stay in the house for an extended time but certainly I think you can apply to be housed.

Hope this helps, although it would be worth taking professional advice, immediately.