Renting while parents own over £1.4million in property

[Emmav2020]

Just after peoples thoughts. So myself and OH pay £1000 in rent a month aswell as having 2 kids and paying a fortune in childcare. My parents own the above amount in property. Now while ive spend over £50,400 paying rent i was thinking and kind of got myself annoyed that my parents are sat on that kind of money while im still renting. Even if they gave me a small deposit i would be forever grateful just so we can get ourselves a mortgage and onto the property ladder. my sister was given a hefty chunk my her in-laws to buy a house so shes find.
I mean we have save a bit ourselves but its nowhere near what we need
Would you be annoyed or do i have no right in thinking they could help us just a little.

Don't think the op is either. She's renting out a property owned by her parents, who took out a loan to renovate it and the OP is paying the loan repayments not market rent - many people would say that's helping out. It's likely the parents will give her the house anyway.

How entitled. Get a better job and sort yourself out.

Not being charged market rent is already a huge hand up for OP. Her parents are definitely being generous and helpful.

They are both famously "careful" with their money and have publicly stated many times that they expect their kids to make their own way in life. In any case, giving their kids money would be the least they could do for them since the truly invaluable thing they've given them is "connections" - making it very much easier for them to make their own way in life!

"She's renting out a property owned by her parents, who took out a loan to renovate it and the OP is paying the loan repayments not market rent ...". Do you know the OP personally? She has not said, in either of her two posts, that her parents are her landlords, that they took out a loan to renovate the property she lives in, or (as someone else has claimed) that her parents own BTL properties and the OP rents one of them. So, unless you personally know the OP's circumstances, where are you getting this from? The OP has only ever stated (in her opening post) that she pays £1k in rent.

I bought my first house in 1995 it was £63000 I had been living in rented accommodation and was a single mother due to a divorce and my husband paid no maintenance. Once I had work my way up the ladder to the point where I earned enough to get a mortgage my mum lent me 10k for a deposit . I bought a house and when I sold it 10 years later I gave half the money back to my mim . She let me keep the remaining £5k I was very grateful for the help . Property prices now put buying a home so far out of reach for many . My daughter actually moved to Australia for better wages and cheaper property and bought a house with her ex partner . When my mum died last year she had left her 20 k and I topped it up from my inheritance to £100k so she could buy a new home with her fiancée . I never had the cash to do it before I had an inheritance . I’m asset rich with a property where my mortgage is fully paid off but I don’t earn a big salary . My daughter never asked me for anything but she had proved she could work hard and had already bough a house so had some deposit to put down from the sale so I was happy to give her the money knowing she would be sensible she is 34 and hasn’t had children because she wanted to have a home first . Parents aren’t responsible for you as an adult they have done their bit but I’m sure if you discussed options with them they may if they have the funds be able to help you but you being angry and resentful at them even though you made the decisions to live as you do is unfair and petulant .

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/money-matters/4608305-family-member-landlord-and-universal-credits

From page 1

Well said - spot on! And the women in your family have obviously done a great job with their daughters! 😊

Brilliant, thank you, now I understand. I presume there are a lot of regular MN users on here (and the OP is one of them) since how anyone new is meant to know that this information was in an entirely separate thread from two years ago is anybody's guess! 😵‍💫😂

You can do an advanced search on the posters username to gain an insight into their history. Most people frequently name change which limits info available.

So do you know them personally and know this to be true? Or did you read it in the daily mail etc?

Thank you for that. So now the numbers dont make sense. Even if OP paid £1000 pcm for just over 2 years that only makes total rent/loan repayment £24k. Where does the £50k rent in OP opening post come from?

I don't understand this thinking that parents should give/offer to subsidise their adult kids' lives. I got on the housing ladder, having saved hard from when I started work at 16. Married and bought 1st house mid 20's didn't start family until early 30s. My parents had nothing but love and support for me and I expected nothing from them. My kids seem to think that what I have now is "theirs" but IF I choose to leave them anything that will be up to me. I help now and then when I want to but have told them it's my money to do as I please with not theirs. Happily now single, solvent and enjoying what's left of my life I my late 60s

Indeed. And her post on the other thread says she started out paying them just £700pcm two years ago. Maybe her figure is a calculation of all the rent she's ever paid? (i.e. includes what she paid to her previous landlord before moving into her parents rental property? 🤔)

I don’t understand the correlation. That’s your parents money, not yours.

In a similar situation. My biologial M wanted to buy my council house , so my 3 grown kids would have something when i go, or i could have cashed in in 5yrs and made a profit and got something smaller. Current market value is upwards of £170000.
It would have been my inheritance from M and Step F With my 2 other sisters( both his biologically) having the rest when they pass.They are already doing pretty well as it happens. Good jobs and properties.
StepF decided not to go ahead as it would have meant re -financing their mortgage free home for £93000.
Felt peeved at first but realised it was for the best.
Not sure what will happen when they pass. But I'm not waiting on an inheritance that may never come.
Better to make your own way and if good fortune does get passed down, it would benefit future generations.

I don't think most people do own more than a million in assets?!
I guess depends which circles you move in.
The feedback on decision to get rid of winter fuel payments surely shows a lot of people are not well off :(

I can't see if the OP has replied to their initial message as too many pages of messages! But the older generation do say life is more expensive today, seperate to relative change.

If I had excess money I would definitely help my children get onto the property ladder, renting is money in the home owners pocket and if it's possible to buy then it's an investment for life. If there's excess money then this can be taken off any inheritance they could have received upon their death. I don't see the point in waiting, by the time the older generation pass now, the adult children are normally financially stable and not in need of the money. It's so much harder to get onto the property ladder nowadays. Also knowing the OP sister has been helped by her in laws will be hard to muster even though her own parents didn't help her.

Basically I don't see parents supporting their adult children as money grabbing at all, if they have it. My children will always be my children no matter what age, and if I can help them financially at 30,40,50 I will. They will of course not expect this and be grateful.

My husband and I had children before we bought and have had to struggle to get by at times and get onto the property ladder. Literally surviving on £25 a month some months after paying the bills, but that's life at times. But my FIL did help with a deposit for our home because he could afford it, and this was after us paying him rent on a second house for 3 years which he bought where he gained £80k in equity.

So if your parents can afford to help you as a one off to get onto the property ladder I don't see this as ungrateful or entitled. The children as also their grandchildren which I will one day see as an absolute blessing for me to become a grandmother. If my children are hard working, earning their own money and not blowing what they have on unnecessary items then yes I'd help them

Ps we had children due to our ages and knowing that we could live without our own home but could not live without having our own children, our children have never gone without and they are so loved. We made the right choice and so to ask why did you have children before buying a house is not applicable to all, it's situation dependant and personal. We were both working and qualified and were ready, and we rented for 5 years before buying with the help of our father in law.

Parents have already long term given you the money to buy a home … but you decided to spend it and not save for a house if your own.

You make your choices.
Parents make theirs.

Parents renting to OP is/was mutually beneficial … but now she sees she should have made different choices with her money over the years.

So you're expecting your parents to sell property to give you funds to buy a property for yourself? If they have £1.4m tied up in property then they're not really in a position to gift you cash are they unless they make a good income renting out or is the £1.4m what their home is valued at? Either way why should your parents be expected to fund your life? You're an adult & shouldn't be reliant on your parents.

Op, assuming you are still reading. I referred to your previous thread, where you were moving into a house owned by your parents, as a single parent. You now mention annOH. Thats great. I hope you are happy.
Your parents already appear to be giving you a break on the rent.

Could it be that they do not want to gift the property to you, to ensure that it remains a secure home for you and their grandchildren? Perhaps they are concerned about losing family wealth should anything happen with your OH, particularly if you marry ?

My parents did not have that kind of wealth, but they were very kind to us while they lived. I don’t think you are doing too badly if you have a secure tenancy and a lower than market rent.

So if your rent is £200 p.m. less then market they’ve already given you £20,000, That’s generous.

I rented from my Mom for several years, I paid current market rent when I first started, she never raised my rent in 15 years so it was below market when I purchased my own home. I would never have expected my mom to let me live there rent free. I also covered all the house expenses/repairs as I appreciated that I had a lovely home that I wouldn't have had otherwise.
I also was one of those moms that charged my kids rent once they graduated. The deal was, if you live here, if you aren't in school you pay rent. And no I didn't save it up and give to them when they moved out.

Here here!!