Do you feel bad for receiving a ‘high amount’ of UC?

[AnotherNameChange1233]

Last week I went to my local Children’s Centre and attended a Citizen’s Advice group that runs once a week.

As long as you’re registered to the Children Centre, you can turn up for any advice needed. Some people want privacy so they go into a side room with the advisor and some parents may help other parents if they’ve been in a similar situation/can offer the correct advice. It’s also like a social group for parents, hopefully you get the jist of it.

On the table I was sitting on, one parent was trying to get her head around UC as she didn’t quite understand LHA rates, how DLA impacts UC and what elements she would be entitled too. Anyway, I started speaking about my experience with DLA, UC and offered to log into my UC account if it was easier for her to look at the breakdown visually (instead of me talking and complicating things). I also got her postcode to explain how the LHA rates work and etc.

Another parent suddenly spoke up and said, ‘don’t you feel bad for claiming that much money?’ She wasn’t argumentative or anything and we had an interesting conversation but it made me think, are people like me supposed to feel bad when receiving a certain amount?

She also said something like (I’m paraphrasing here as I can’t remember it exactly word for word) if people can’t afford their rent then they should move to a more affordable area. I raised the point of Landlords purchasing properties as part of the Right to Buy scheme, charging extortionate rent which taxpayers then pay through UC. Surely, it’s more a problem that there isn’t affordable rental properties in many areas.

For full transparency, I’m going to mention all of my UC amounts and wonder if people that claim similar, feel bad?

• 292 single person allowance
• 1450 private rent
• 539 for 2 children
• 293 for 2 disabled children
• 589 childcare costs
• 189 carer

£216 is deducted from my entitlement due to my wages. That means my UC amount is £3133. My wages is £771. I receive two amounts of MRC through DLA which is £580 all together.

Now that I’ve written it down, it seems like a whole lot of money but the costs that come with raising one of my disabled children (the other still costs a lot, but not as much as the other) is through the roof due to their issues

I don't know if you have missed this part, but one of OP's dc has Down's syndrome.

A major part of her benefits relates to private rent of £1450pcm- from a landlord that purchased OP's home under the right to buy scheme and instead of living in it as intended, rents it out. That's the immoral part.

OP is on her own with 2 disabled dc, she works.

I understand that you are raising two disabled children however that does sound incredibly generous when people working full time are earning less and need to pay rent and childcare from their earnings. DLA is different as you can claim that in work. I would advise not to be so open in real life as it will breed resentment from those who are struggling to cope with working far more hours raising children. I also don't understand how you can work and get carers - I lost my carers allowance when I went back to part time work.

I have written to my MP about the ridiculous situation where maintenance payments are not taken into account in this situation. OP's refusal to disclose whether she gets maintenance payments crystallised my thinking on this. I was unaware of it before. Either she doesn't get maintenance payments, in which case if the father is earning he should be contributing, or she does and her payments should be adjusted accordingly.

It's a disgraceful state of affairs and I urge all of you hard taxpayers struggling to make ends meet to do the same. Make it known that this is not ok.

OP won't get carers allowance as she earns over the threshold however she will get carers element on UC which has no threshold of earnings so if you have a family member on DLA/PIP then you should also be able to claim the carers element (however do be aware it's not a protected element and wages can wipe it out if earning too much).

Surely there are more pressing issues? Like looking at the reasons for the need for benefits in the first place? Addressing the shameful inequality in this country? Tackling climate change? Do you write to your MP about NHS waiting lists? The state of elderly care?

Hope you don’t mind, but I’d like to chip in here. Extra costs for me include:- private therapies, extra uniform and clothing, increased washing, a pushchair, greatly increased food bill, extra costs for therapy type items, extra cleaning items, travel to appointments, costs for books so I can learn more… that’s just off the top of my head. My earnings are greatly reduced as well.
Obviously this won’t be exactly the same for all parents of Autistic children.

Considering that 50% of marriages end in divorce people should absolutely plan for the possibility of becoming a single parent. Not hope for the best that when shit happens the taxpayers will pick up the bill (quite often already covered by the other parent but excluded from benefit calculation).
There is no excuse to treat all single parents as victims of circumstances beyond their control.

People that find themselves in poverty and using food banks etc that then go on to have another child.

If someone is in that situation, and chooses to have another, they shouldn't receive anything from that state for that child because having another when you can't provide for the child/ren you have is just irresponsible.

Although by the looks of it, a life on bens isn't the poverty stricken life we are led to believe it is. Especially when this amount of money is dished out and there are free school meals, free meals dished out in the holidays, school uniform grants, childcare paid for, that doesn't need to come out the cash people are given.

i hadn’t realised either and I’m going to do the same right now (write to MP)

Or we stop viewing caring (which largely falls to women) as not working! She works at looking after two disabled children. Who would step in if she didn’t and how much would that cost the state. Why should those children live in poverty because they have disabilities through no fault of their own? What would we do instead? Just let those kids suffer?

She hasn't been given these random children to care for out of her own pocket, these are her own children that she chose to have, why should paying for them fall to others?

Paying for them and caring for them is her and the fathers responsibility, and theirs alone.

Why is she lauded as a hero and have cash thrown at her for looking after her own kids?

if you are caring for disabled children then i don’t think it’s a problem 🤷‍♀️

Child Maintenance payments (as I understand it) aren’t taken into account because if a parent suddenly stopped paying, the child would be in a v tricky situation.

Well it’s not the kids’ fault is it. Why shouldn’t they be fed and looked after.

This is what people need to understand. People on benefits get a raw deal in terms of peoples opinions. Benefits are there for a reason

In an ideal world that would not happen, and people would not have children that they cannot afford. We do not live in an ideal world. Why should the children in these cases suffer? And always remember that people's circumstances can change, just like that! Anyone who could begrudge children being provided with the basics, because of the situation of the parents, imo, are sorry people.

This.

Why is NMW and the living wage such a pittance in comparision then, if this is whatis NEEDED to live off?

Figures for non-disabled children are also disgraceful, in terms of what is given compared to what the average wage is. It seems a life on bens pays.

I don't blame you. It's pretty shocking.

People are asking because you are receiving batshit crazy mount of money from taxpayers.
People working for average salary of half your benefits support their children. It is completelly unreasonable that you are paid that much.
It would be more feesable to send you to work for 65k you claim you can rack and provide you with 8h od free daycare for your disabled children.

Makes me wonder if you still live with dad, claim to be single and have joint household income of 100k if he works any average job.
It is insane.

Jesus Christ. I have no words. That is one of the cruelest things I’ve ever read on here. Please describe what you think should happen and what impact that would have on those children.

@JosiePosey are they? Can you provide those figures so we can compare?

I really think you are underestimating how expensive raising a child with disability is.

Your maths is out - £2,000 per week * 52 weeks = 104,000 per year

Do either of you have two disabled children to look after?

I’m used to nasty threads about disabled children in mumsnet but this one has shocked me