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Original poster

Do you have a secret bank account?

103 replies

Soffana · 26/10/2022 11:27

That no one knows about?

Either you husband/partner?

Or perhaps you have more money than you let others to believe?

OP posts:
Discovereads · 26/10/2022 11:27

No.

lentilly · 26/10/2022 11:29

Yes. It doesn't have much in. But it's seperate mostly so I don't get tempted to spend it myself!

IllDoItButOnlyForTheAttention · 26/10/2022 11:29

Yep! Got enough in there to pay off the mortgage.

AlmostOver22 · 26/10/2022 11:29

No

Dacadactyl · 26/10/2022 11:30

No. Only a joint account for everything and then savings accounts that we both know about.

Original poster
Soffana · 26/10/2022 11:30

lentilly · 26/10/2022 11:29

Yes. It doesn't have much in. But it's seperate mostly so I don't get tempted to spend it myself!

Does your husband/partner know about this account?

OP posts:
Kabbalah · 26/10/2022 11:30

That's the very definition of a, "Red Flag".

Lmgify · 26/10/2022 11:30

Not secret. But I do have a separate finances to my husband. A friend of mine deliberately told her boyfriend she earned less than she did and stashed it all away. Was an awkward moment when they applied for a mortgage together and she had to come clean that she earned more than him and she’s got a lot of cash. I’m not sure a secret stash is the way to go in a trusting relationship.

ladygindiva · 26/10/2022 11:31

Yes with enough in ( fluctuating) to cover 2-3 months living expenses should the worst happen. It's a secret because DP is terrible with money and isn't a forward planner and would probably nag me to blow it on luxuries or a holiday. I see it as looking out for my kids.

Season0fTheWitch · 26/10/2022 11:31

I have a seperate account that DH knows about. He knows how much is in it and knows it's a just in case fund. You never know what might happen. He doesn't have one but he's the higher earner and if anything happened his parents are well off and could support him

hiredandsqueak · 26/10/2022 11:32

I did when I was planning to leave exh. It's now my current account.

lunar1 · 26/10/2022 11:32

Not secret, but separate. DH is the higher earner and has always insisted equal amounts got into our savings every month.

The rest of our finances are joint.

lentilly · 26/10/2022 11:33

Soffana · 26/10/2022 11:30

Does your husband/partner know about this account?

Show quote history

Well he should do but he didn't pay much attention when we applied for the mortgage

Remainiac · 26/10/2022 11:37

Not secret, but we have no shared accounts other than mortgage and don’t discuss money, other than mortgage and more recently, pensions. I don’t know how much Dh has in his savings and he doesn’t know what I have in mine other than pension and that’s just ballpark. We’d been married more than 20 years before we took out a joint mortgage. Day to day stuff, no we don’t share that. All I’m sure of is that I’m the higher earner and that suits me fine.

tealandteal · 26/10/2022 11:37

I have a separate account but my husband knows it exists. He doesn’t know how much is in it but it’s only a small amount as it’s just our fun money. We each take the same amount each month.

Idontdoyoga · 26/10/2022 11:37

It was the best advice my mother gave me.

When my late husband lost his business I came clean and baled us out. I was able to buy a house because we lost our home - everything. He was never more relieved.

However I did replenish my fund over the years & it laid me in good stead when he cheated on me! Nuf said.

feelthefreedom · 26/10/2022 11:38

Kabbalah · 26/10/2022 11:30

That's the very definition of a, "Red Flag".

Or a definition of an "emergency fund"

feelthefreedom · 26/10/2022 11:42

I do, it has a couple of grand in that he doesn't know about. However, in my defence, we are not married, don't do joint finances, he earns triple the amount I do, owns 5 properties, and tells me if we ever split up me and our children leave with nothing other than the clothes on our backs. So I need some sort of safety blanket should he ever decide it's over.

thinkponk48 · 26/10/2022 11:44

feelthefreedom · 26/10/2022 11:42

I do, it has a couple of grand in that he doesn't know about. However, in my defence, we are not married, don't do joint finances, he earns triple the amount I do, owns 5 properties, and tells me if we ever split up me and our children leave with nothing other than the clothes on our backs. So I need some sort of safety blanket should he ever decide it's over.

Why would you stay with someone like that.

estoymaquillandome · 26/10/2022 11:45

No. It's already a crap marriage if you're keeping secret accounts. You may as well throw in the towel.

QuietYou · 26/10/2022 11:46

Nothing is secret from DH but as a couple we have way more money than anyone else in the family including our children knows about.

PlantsAndSpaniels · 26/10/2022 12:01

No secret accounts but each have personal savings accounts as well as joint account for bills. I know I have more in my savings.

Chewbecca · 26/10/2022 12:03

Our accounts are separate but there are no secrets whatsoever.

Cameleongirl · 26/10/2022 12:05

We have personal savings accounts, as well as joint accounts for bills and savings.

Numbat2022 · 26/10/2022 12:07

No, but I do have my own savings account which isn't linked to the joint account. My partner could probably access it simply because all my bank information is in our house, but his name isn't linked to it.

He also has his own savings account, and then the joint account is for bills and family disposable income. If we pay for something big we both transfer money from our own accounts and pay it from the household account. The only time I ever emptied my savings account was when we bought the house and put every penny we could into the deposit (and I felt really uncomfortable until I had some savings built up again).

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