Rent for adult child

[Whatshouldmynamebe321]

I would appreciate finding out what parents charge their adult children in terms of rent?
I feel I need to start charging my dd now she has left college and is working, but it feels mean! I know it will help realise the costs of living and I will save a portion of it to return to her as a deposit on a house.
I was feeling a third of her income maybe appropriate.....what do others think/charge?

@VeganGod I agree it's odd and unfair of OP.
Your DD is 17 what does she earn? We can't tell you if a 3rd is too much OP. I suspect you are getting CB and you have left that part out.

I'm saving but not telling him. Mum did the same for me.

He may save as well as I'm not taking loads

Well you haven't lost £500. Your circumstances changed and your child became an adult. Which means you could of upped your hours and organised yourself. When kids are young it's hard because you work less hours usually. But you now surely have time which equals money!

I already work full time thank you very much. As he is an adult he can contribute to the household costs. I’m a single parent. It’s hard work. If I had a husband helping then things would be different. But I pay for everything so he has to contribute.

I'm a SP too. I never said he shouldn't contribute nor did I question the amount your DS pays. I was merely stating you haven't lost £500... because your able to work more now surely. It will come to us all loosing CB and the rest like you said.

She put the word lost in quotes for that reason presumably. And she’s stated she already works full time.

@VeganGod I know. But my point was its not really lost is it then because you can earn more than being part time when your child is 18. Like I said it comes to us all... loosing CMS and so on

I hate the charge them rent and secretly saving it for them. I think it is so patronising. Why don't people say, "I think x would be fair but I want you to be able to save for the future so how about y?" Let them be adults and make decisions about where to save it, what to spend it on.

@Countdownis35

Its perfectly clear what @Feelingoktodaymeans, between increased outgoings and loss of income, her household budget is out by £500, she already works ful time, why should she work more?
I am in a similar position except I will be out by over £1000, what should I do?

In 3 years I will be a 60 - my son will be 21 and more than likely still at home. Should I aim to be working 2 jobs to fund him?

Totally agree.

But you assumed she wasn’t working full time. She is. And clearly she was making the point that it wasn’t really lost by putting it in quotes.

The poster was just stating what she has done in terms of ‘rent’ because she was replying on a thread asking the question. I’m not sure what the issue is with that. She’s not moaning that she’s lost money, just stating how what she did. She ‘organised’ it like you said she should have. 🤷🏻‍♀️

She is not 17 she is 20. I felt her earnings are irrelevant if I'm suggesting a portion of them. And I do not receive child benefit.

I was simply asking for others views and there are lots of really helpful answers here which are helping me to come to what I believe will work for my family.

Some of these posts are horrible.

Some people have to ask for a contribution because they can’t afford to fund another person, yes, even working full time ! Some people could afford to fund them, but feel it’s a good thing to charge them so they get used to paying for living costs. Hardly terrible people.

To the people that say their kids save so it’s not an issue. Great. But some don’t, so doing it for them until they do grow a bit more common sense isn’t a terrible idea.
And even if your kids do save, I know more than a few adult kids who were saving for house deposits, being sensible and then ended up blowing it on holidays and other stuff when they got some new friends work or a different boyfriend/girlfriend influencing them. Their parents wished they’d have saved the money for them when that happened.

I charge mine £250 a month each. That includes me paying for the food and all the bills. They buy the odd take away and sometimes a small top up shop. They are both happy with that and don’t think it’s unfair. I tend to save up the money and use it to do improvements to the house so if they ever inherit the house it will have gone towards that. Both are saving up for their own houses but are showing no signs of moving out yet!

Ds pays us £275 a month, this is to cover heating and food and is approximately 20% of his income.
Adults with full time jobs should pay their way- he earns more than I do.
We charged him a lot less when he was looking for work.

It's their home : I have no intention of taking money off them. They'll discover the realities of life soon enough.

Omg!!!

that would cover my mortgage and also my car payments!(car is a 2 year old Audi)

mine both still at uni and I don’t charge them and I pay their phones, everything else they pay for.

will come to that bridge when they qualify and get jobs but it will be a minimal amount as I encourage them to save .

What's patronising about this. I may need the money. He earns more than me but for now it will be saved. We've bankrolled him for a while and he's not a teenager

£1000 ? ! Do you work very part time or somehting?

We charge about 10% in our house . The day he started work my son asked how much he had to pay and told me he expected a lot more ( if only I’d known 😀)

I work pretty much full time, I have a decent job but am far from being a high earner. I am a single parent. We are an adoptive family so no other parent contributing.

My reduction in income has not exactly been a surprise, I’ve been adjusting over the last two or three years to mitigate against the loss of income. I’m not stupid, I planned for my mortgage to finish to coincide with the ending of his benefits - a great saving but not as much as the loss of income. He has some additional needs which make him a bit more expensive to ‘run’ than the average teenager.

We will be far from destiture but if HE wants the standard of living he has now, which is not exactly extravagant, then he will have to contribute by picking up some of his own costs and throwing a bit into the household pot. I won’t be running off on luxury cruises on the proceeds.

I refuse to ever charge my children rent. This will always be there home no matter how old they are. As long as they're not throwing money away I won't feel the need to charge them.

My dd still has £1000 left after she has paid me. She doesn't go out, hardly buys any clothes, doesn't drink or smoke. She pays her bus fare to work when I can't take her. Also has £10 grand in her bank account, she can move out any time she wants.

It's different if you've lost money and particularly if you're a single parent who still has rent/mortgage to pay on a home big enough to keep up separate bedrooms for your children. If you've two wages coming in anyway or if your house is paid off you don't have a shortfall to make up in the same way. It totally depends on circumstances really.

My son still has £800 to sorbs on himself a month after he has paid me his 20%.

I wish I had £800 to spend in myself and not running a house and buying food. I don’t feel any sympathy for him paying 20% towards the cost of the house. I still treat him, take him out for meals, buy bits for his car. Don’t worry he is fine.