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Original poster

AIBU- Sister is angry i wont sell my share of the house!

190 replies

CollegeDoctor · 20/10/2021 00:43

DH and I are in great need of the hive mind. So last year due to issues with our father, we , my mother and brother and I. Purchased a home for my mother to live in. We asked dear sister to contribute, however she had'nt got the money at the time so could'nt. SO fast forward a year and a pandemic and the property value has increased by £40,000. Dsister came back and asked if she could purchase the house from us, i stupidly said yes and that she could do it at the price we bought at. (i really didnt think she would get all her ducks in a row)

Fast forward 2 months and she has and now wants to proceed to conveyancing. I know i was wrong to lead her on and promise, but i don't want to sell as the property is certain to continuing appreciating. What should i do ? What would you do?
Dsister is very angry that i have wasted her time.

OP posts:
lottiegarbanzo · 20/10/2021 06:19

What were you thinking? Why on earth would you sell your share of an appreciating asset at the price you paid in the past? What is the purpose of the transaction from your point of view? Do you need quick cash?

IveGotASongThatllGetOnYNerves · 20/10/2021 06:19

So the house would be in her name.
This share your mum and brother have - is it legally binding ie their names on the deeds or just relying on trust with nothing official to back it up?

If the latter then I would say in order to protect mum and brother, we need to have their share of the house legally recognised.

See if she still wants to buy then!

IveGotASongThatllGetOnYNerves · 20/10/2021 06:21

Oh, and this is a good lesson. Don't offer things you don't mean.

Dontgetyerknicksinatwist · 20/10/2021 06:28

Why should you? She’s just out to get the financial benefit for herself. She had her chance at the start. Just say you’ve changed your mind.

Alicesays · 20/10/2021 06:29

I'd just be honest about it and say she caught you off guard and now you've had time to think about it, you have decided not to sell.

ThumbWitchesAbroad · 20/10/2021 06:36

In the kindest possible way, you were absolutely nuts to have agreed, even in principle!, to sell it at the price at which you bought it.

Now I would get it valued, work out what your share is worth, tell her she can buy it at that rate but has to take into account legal fees and possibly stamp duty, to say nothing of whatever taxes you're likely to pick up as a result of the sale - I mean, if you sold it to her now you'd be losing money, which is just out of the question for most people.

She can be as angry as she likes - she can't force you to sell.

PinkWaferBiscuit · 20/10/2021 06:36

The whole thing sounds very messed up. Is the money given by your mother and brother actually protected in any way because unless I'm reading it wrong you got them to help you purchase a house they now have no legal claim to because it's only in yours and your husbands name.

It just sounds like you took advantage of them to expand your property portfolio.

As for your sister I agree with previous posters you said yes so you could appear a better person and now it's coming back to bite you on the arse. I wouldn't be surprised if the whole thing blows up if you now say no and your other relatives want their money back.

If I were then I'd wonder what's stopping you turning round at a later date and not giving them any money from the property if you sold it for example.

The whole arrangement hinges on your word and it's clear your word does not actually mean anything and your promises are easily broken.

Seeingadistance · 20/10/2021 06:37

Your thread title is misleading. Your sister is angry because you lied to her. You agreed to sell, with no intention of keeping your side of the deal.

crankysaurus · 20/10/2021 06:37

It does sound a bit grabby on her part but then you did offer her a good deal.

I'd also be more concerned overall though about the legal protections for you mum and brother. You speak as though your selling the house, not your share, and with it all in one person/ couple's name it sounds precarious for the others.

Beautiful3 · 20/10/2021 06:37

Just say you're sorry but you've changed your mind because the value of the property has increased too much.

YellowMonday · 20/10/2021 06:38

You should never have offered with an expectation your sister would not source the money.

If you are in a tri-party purchase with your mum and brother, do you have a contract? Usually when multiple people purchase a property properly (with a contract), there is a clause requiring all to agree if one sells their share.

Another option would be to discuss with your mum and brother to move to a 4th share that your sister could buy into. Personally, I don't know what benefit there would be with any equity increases split across 4 people and further reduces by fees (when selling house etc).

Regardless, you made a huge mistake. This will impact your relationship.

You need to be honest with your sister that you screwed up for [whatever] reason. If you, your mum, brother agree to create a 4th share you must work through this first before offering to your sister!

ButterflyAway · 20/10/2021 07:02

Agree with @madisonbridges

You did a really shitty thing, you’re now reaping the well deserved consequences. You’re not a good sister at all, quite the opposite.

Tal45 · 20/10/2021 07:03

So if your sister buys it at the old price and then makes a quick sale to get £40,000 profit where does that leave your mum and brother? How is your mum and brother's investment being protected? Are they not entitled to part of the profit also?

I think you need to own up and tell your sister you only agreed because you didn't think she would be able to get the money together. Instead of looking like the good sister you will look like the bad sister which is what you are, but at the end of the day it's your house and you don't have to sell it especially when you bought it for your mum. Better you upset your sister now then potentially cause all sorts of family rifts by selling the house to her.

2Two · 20/10/2021 07:07

@SimonedeBeauvoirscat

This sounds like a legal catastrophe. Have you had professional advice?
Not really. As it's land, nothing is binding unless it's done by deed.
2Two · 20/10/2021 07:09

Tell her the offer applied two months ago, not now, but offer to sell half your share at current values.

Original poster
CollegeDoctor · 20/10/2021 07:11

to add a small detail, our mother is not in any immediate or long term danger, nor has she ever been. She is not vulnerable, but needed a place to live closer to work and family. My sister will not kick her out, there is no issues with the relationship between my sister and mother.

OP posts:
Whinge · 20/10/2021 07:13

[quote CollegeDoctor]@madisonbridges stop being an alarmist.[/quote]
I guess the truth hurts. @madisonbridgesadison is 100% correct in what they've posted.

Chipsinthewoods · 20/10/2021 07:14

I would apologise- you thought it would be a straightforward thing to do but looking at it legally, it could actually end up looking like a tax avoidance scheme or leave your mum/brother legally vulnerable in some way. Could she buy a smaller share at market value?

Alwaysonthegoslow · 20/10/2021 07:16

I mean you can pull out but don’t expect DSis not to be very upset and angry with you. Why the hell did you agree?

NataliaSerene · 20/10/2021 07:17

If the purpose is for investment I don’t know why you’d agree to give away the equity. Or why she would think you should just hand it over. This market won’t last forever and no one should be expected to hand over these unexpected gains. Just tell her to save her money for the next deal you find.

Still something is not right about the whole thing and the way you are describing it. What’s the benefit to her if she buys into property that you all have no intention of selling?

Original poster
CollegeDoctor · 20/10/2021 07:17

well the Hive has spoken and I will act accordingly.
Thank you for all the responses.

OP posts:
Shehasadiamondinthesky · 20/10/2021 07:18

I don't understand why you agreed to this madness. Tell her you've changed your mind.

flippertyop · 20/10/2021 07:19

If your sister didn't have the money before it doesn't sound like she has the disposable income available to guarantee at some point she won't need to sell - and that leaves your mum and brother very vulnerable.
I think you should have said no but you know that already. Now you've said yes I think you need to follow through

PoloMintPatty · 20/10/2021 07:19

If you sell at current rates will this crystallise a cgt bill for you if it's all in your name?

Alternatively if you sell at two years ago rates it'll appear on Rightmove etc and might do something to offset that perceived appreciation? We all know that buyers and agents look at that for a guide on the local market.

Subbaxeo · 20/10/2021 07:19

So you have 2 properties as well as this and this is your sister’s first? Do you not want to be able to give her a hand-you gad the good fortune to be in a position to buy this a year ago and your sister didn’t. Now she’s managed to get some money. Maybe try not to get excited about how much the house has appreciated but consider it might help your sister. Unless this is some kind of tax dodge of course. It does sound a bit confusing.