45K in debt

[UsedToLoveMorrissey]

Hello, i think i just need to get this off my chest.

We are £45k in debt. All unsecured, and no access to anymore credit and all in husband's name.

I don't work. I used to do well on-line and at craft fairs but that has taken a huge hit and I don't do fairs anymore as they are not worth it now where we live. I am learning to drive so I can get a job within school hours (we live in the middle of nowhere, 5 buses a day, if they bother to show up and times don't suit to get back for DS).

DH has a good job, but we live in Scotland and I think the rate has changed or the pension contributions have because DH is less £70 a month now. I cried when I saw this this morning.

We can make the payments but any spending above our food/petrol/school lunches etc and we end up in our overdraft so by christmas, we are £2k down. My craft sales at xmas pay this off thankfully, and pays for presents but the rest of the year is rubbish. I sell on Etsy so I dont have a website to upkeep, just the cost of listing each item and a small % in commission.

DS has a good job, but with less than £3k a month coming in, and £900 of to go purely on CC and Loans repayments, excluding mortgage and car (which DH needs because of where we live) we are struggling. Our food bill is approx £100 per month. That includes 1 bottle of wine. No smokes. I have coeliac disease so my bread is a bit dearer, but that's only one loaf a week. One pack of GF biscuits, no other biscuits and very little crap.

I'm not a good cook, we eat basic meals that I do cook from scratch. We eat meat once a week (either chicken or mince beef), we eat mostly salads with tuna/roasted veg and rice/baked pots/soups. We don't eat takeways (we live too far our for delivery). I get the shopping delivered from Asda as that works out at about 40p per week with the mid week saver. We go through about 20 eggs a week (DS and DH love them). Sliced Egg on toast is a favourite weekend lunch.

We eat a lot of fruit, which we do buy from M&S as that is so nice. I have found the delivered fruit to be poor quaility.

If I really try, I am sure we could shave about £10 of the shopping. But really, I cant see anywhere else to make the saving.

The issue somes to this: because we are making the payments, we've not missed one, the Debt website Step Change, are recommending a cut in spending accross the board but no debt advice as such because we can repay.

Also, DH has a job which he would lose if he was made bankrupt. We'd love the debt to be paid off, but we have no extra income, and we'd be out on the streets if were chose a debt soloution as we have no savings to get us through DS losing his job.

I'm prepared to accept the advice that we simply have to accept the situation, we can pay the debt, we have a house and food, but we have nothing else. Any clothes, hair cuts, days out takes us further in debt. It's getting us down and we are snipping at each other too. I'm probably about 6mth away from passing my driving test, and will be reliant on getting a part time job to help out. Until then, I'll keep doing surveys. Being a lurker on here, I have recently changed the CC repayments to a set amount, so that should reduce the balance so much quicker. Thank you t the poster who mentioned this trick.

Sorry for the moan. I know we are to a certain extent luckier than so many people but for 2 very unflashy, unshowy people, we sure have wracked up too much debt through poor choices years ago.

Do you have any loans which could have been lent to you when you couldn’t afford it? Debt camel is very good at explaining how to claim back interest.

OP said she spends £100 per MONTH on food, not per week.

I've had an IVA and it was the worst decision I made (in hindsight I should have thought about it more re future financial plans).

I would cancel lottery & Netflix & also check you council tax banding.

Are your utilities all in contract? Maybe swapping could save a few pennies?

Get rid of Sky, Lottery and sport! It's a luxury but you're in 45k of debt. £8 on Netflix is more reasonable.

Just to give u an idea I spend around £50 a month for tv internet and phone with virgin and that includes BT sport. I changed my council tax to be paid over 12 months, I prefer to pay lower cost monthly than get 2 months off. I have recently opted out of my work pension, only for a year or so, to get myself straight financially. Also I know it's the old cliche but I have started to sell things on eBay, I have had a big declutter and I have managed to earn myself £300 since the end of February, which has paid for a caravan week away (I'm proud of this and I got this tip off mumsnet) friends and family have heard I'm doing well and started to pass me their unwanted bits too. I think your best bet here is to get a job also, I agree weeknight and weekend are best for now. I also do a spreadsheet of everything I spend and earn, it helps sometimes to have it in black and white

Elizabeth
I'm pretty sure that was a typo though. She says she buys all her fruit at M&S, I don't think she's spending £25 a week!

Also u could advertise as a cleaner and a dog walker while your DS is at school, at least you could use the extra bit of money for a day out or haircuts etc, also I always shop in charity shops, today I have bought 2 quality items from next for £6, I'm made up

Sorry 2 items from the charity shop that are from next

OP, NowTv has some good packages. Have a look and see what you think.

We don't have Netflix or sky or lottery. Can you get rid of one of these?

wineandsunshine thats interesting - do you mind me asking why? im a year in and best thing i did - weight lifted from shoulders knowing its getting paid off. i couldnt see any other option for me.

If you are a diagnosed Coeliac you should be able to get bread on prescription. That would save a lot. Also another one saying get rid of lottery. And instead of £55 on BT £8 Netflix and £25 on Sky surely you can get a bundle that incorporates all of these services for a lot less.

So much good advice, thank you.

Food: £100 per WEEK, sorry about the typo. However, last night, thanks to MN, I discovered MySupermarket, and spent ages going through it all. Using that and Moneysaving expert;s tip about down grading the food range, I've managed to come in at £40. There is no meat though, and no laundry, but things like Asda's own rice pudding for treats, own youghrts and OJ, I've saved a fair bit. I've also added bananas and apples . If we can stick to that, on weeks where we have laundry, loo roll, meat, etc, it will be more.

We are going to try and stick to a budget of £130. Once food and petrol costs, we are taking the rest out in cash and putting in a tin. Going to try and stick to that and it will be interesting to see just on what we spend on without thinking.

Neither of us had any clue that we could go to our mortgage lender to renegotiate the terms without an affordability check. DH will do that this week. Thank you for this suggestion.

Prescription coeliac - I get the flour and pasta on prescription. The bread is not that nice, but I am going to add it to May's list as I really cant afford to be choosy.

Utilities and Media packages are all in contract but I'm going to look at Bulb, that sounds brilliant. Also need to look and see the penalties for cancelling Sky and renogotiating a better deal with BT.

Thank you for all the links. I will make my way through them.

Loose bananas and apples are definitely more expensive at M&S than Asda!

OP, I was in a similar situation. You are living a life you can’t afford. The only way out is to be active about money making. If it’s costing you, don’t do it. Only do things that bring in money.

You’ve had excellent suggestions re. lottery, Sky, utilities, but here are other ideas:

• Could your DH give you driving lessons?

• Can you change the car for a cheaper one? At 45k debt, I’d be looking at a small Skoda which drives economically.

• I wonder if your ‘forever home’ is worth it, if you are struggling so much? Either rent out a room, or accept your forever home is a dream beyond your reach.

• Keep a rolling selling website going. Ebay any old thing, Etsy, Facebook. The idea had to be to make money fast, so anything requiring a craft that takes time is out

• A job. You are wasting all those hours when you could be paid to be doing something! Obviously it needs to be local if you don’t drive. Typing? Packing boxes? Grocery store? If you got a few hours at M&S it would pay for your fruit habit!

You need to be committed to the project, if you’re serious about paying it off. Sadly, it means sacrifice and acceptance and facing up to the grim reality.

Good luck

Agree with others if you could get s local job, that would be brilliant. I’d leaflet every house offering dog walking, baby sitting, gardening, cleaning, ironing.
I’d also of jnto very local business and ask about any vacancies. These aren’t usually advertised.

Put your crafting on every free/low commission site going.

Look into homeworking sites, linked to on here.

About the car, do you own it at the end of the payments? If so I wouldn’t sell it, keep it and run it until the debt is paid off.

Shesayameater - I really didn't think about the implications re getting on the housing ladder. Yes I did wipe around £5k off the debt but if I had gone down the voluntary arrangement route my credit wouldn't have been affected for so long (my IVA was agreed at 6 years sadly).

We are stuck now on a income where we could buy our house but can't because the IVA is still sat on my credit file.

Even a low wage part time would make a big dent in this debt fairly quickly. It isn’t unmanageable.
If you work in m and s you can get a discount on the food but otherwise I would not shop there. It is very overpriced.
Agree get rid of sky too.

I'd second moving house. Live nearer to civilisation too.

Just read your recent post. Why are you pleading poverty when you play the lottery and have Netflix and sky??thats 60 quid right there.

Hi OP
Could you get a lodger in for your spare room? You could make quite a bit doing that.
Also, as other people have suggested, getting an evening / weekend job? I would write a cv, put some smart clothes on, and go round your local businesses asking if they need any help with anything. Pubs tend to always need help.
Cleaning, bar tending, pot washing, waitressing, packing, baby sitting, carer,

I have done Martin Lewis Money Makeover yet? It's basically a full audit of all your income and expenditure. It's time consuming but essential to understand the full picture of your finances.

I agree with previous poster who suggested that you appear to be only just realising the seriousness of your situation presumably because your are managing to 'manage'. your debt. This is a dangerous way to live! I think you need to be far more proactive while you have the choice to be.

The lottery has to go. Obviously.

I think the priority should be you getting a full time job. I don't know if you have any skills or experience. What about care work?

You absolutely need to get more money coming into the home. That means finding a job that you can travel to. What are your options re busses?

Can you get a lodger or do AirBnB?

Definitely contact your bank about the rate you're paying.

Cutting will only get you so far on £45k debt.

Not sure if that has been mentioned already but re the mortgage: if your fixed deal has expired you should be able to set up a new rate fix with your own lender rather than actually remortgaging so they don’t need to do a financial assessment. Have a look at their existing customer deals. They are likely to have one that’s lower interest than the SVR.

Can you get the bus one way to ‘civilisation’ to get a job and walk or cycle home as the buses are few and far between?

The answer is surely you earning money during the day so it’s a case of working out how you can do that.

OP - how old is your son? You said he is going to high school in September so surely he must be old enough to be left while you work