Broke for a month

[Temporarilyskint]

i know the way these threads can go - I am not asking for money and while I think it is incredibly sweet when people offer I won't accept

Sorry for above disclaimer.

Have namechanged as I'm a bit embarrassed and my ex stalks me on here.

We've no money. Well, £40. That's to get through to the end of the month.

We have no oven, or microwave. We do have a toaster.

No access to credit.

Fuel costs are high due to having to take my son to school. Not sure if there's a way around this. (He will hopefully be starting at a new school which is local in 2016 but for now it's tough.)

Fussy cats need food.

Argh. I am partly posting for advice, and also partly for emotional sounding off as I'm fed up of thinking about money.

The only thing that will help now is getting an electrician out. So do that today, get the situation fixed and pay them at the end of the month when your money situation resolves itself.

It's the best solution and actually a fairly easy solution.

have seen this advice before and I think it's another 'mumsnet' thing.

IME they want paying there and then.

Sorry op, I can see how it's tough with their dad. Sorry I sounded harsh. The side I was coming from was that this situation is so normal for schools and services they won't bat an eyelid and they will just help you resolve the situation.

Is it worth telling the school something? Just in case they do a lesson on kitchens and your son pipes up about not having anything? I don't think the situation is bad-it sounds like a very temporary problem but I wouldn't want the school to think ta worse than it is.

Temporarily
I do not quite understand why you are asking for help on here when you have not exhausted the Real World options.

Schools are all to well aware hat shit happens.
They have contacts and resources that can sort things out.
Talk to them.
Your kids will let slip anyway.

Find a friend who is an electrician who will wait 30 days for payment.

Get the house sorted.

Being cagey and hiding will not solve anything.

Contact the local Trussell Trust and see what they can do.
Contact the CAB and see what they can do.

email is free
Use it constructively.

SS will not take kids into care due to a short term problem - FFS they cannot afford to

Well why not try ringing some up and finding out ,quite honestly you are coming across as a real negative nelly !

Who would want paying there and then unless its a dodgy cash in hand job?

I never, ever pay workmen on the spot. At the very least say you don't have any cash and they can give you their bank details for you to make a transfer. Then make the transfer in two weeks' time.

Any business running as a company will give you an invoice which you then pay. Its really not hard and I'm not trying to be difficult I'm trying to be helpful.

I've said why I'm asking - you just don't want the answer!

You can also order from a milkman as they take payment next month

There is hundreds of electricians , just find one that will take payment next month.

And you should be telling the school. They can then make sure child is offered seconds daily if he wants it for lunch, and can not hassle you the next few weeks for money for trips/ events.

Your kind of making a mountain out of a molehill.

No sorry, you're dismissing realistic solutions to your problems.

I can see how its easy to be negative but this really doesn't need to be a big deal, an inconvenience but not a big deal.

It sounds like a difficult and stressful situation OP and I'm sorry about that - I appreciate we don't know the back story, but you do sound quite paranoid about anyone in RL being out to get you and take your DC off you.

As PP have suggested maybe start off by ringing up some of the bigger electrician companies to see how they require payment, and have a quiet word with the school.

Neither of those things will result in a phone call to SS.

I really don't want to scare you but your electrics sound dangerous. My husband is an electrician and would accept payment later in the month. Not all do but if you phone round you should be able to find someone to come out and sort them.

30 day payment is fairly normal with domestic contractors.

The thing is, if you accepted help, you would have people to talk to in rl!

I PM'd you last night and I bet others did as well. It's not out of pity or trying to patronise you or trying to take your kids away.

Do you think nobody else has experienced hardship ever? That's why they're offering to help, not because they think you're a charity case.

Also if you have a school place in January starting local, can't you just take eldest out of school to save the huge commuting costs? They only have about a month left until Xmas holidays anyway. And I assume he's not a teenager so he can easily just work from home with you on reading/ writing/ maths/ a topic for those weeks. The £50 petrol can then be used at home

I think that it's pretty obvious that there are things in the OPs life going on that she doesn't want to share. And that for these reasons she is not going to contact SS or the school or any outside agency.

From what I can see, she doesn't want us to fix this. She wants to let off steam and be allowed to be pissed off and upset here as I'm sure she is having to put on her "everything's fine, what a lovely adventure" face for her kids.

Maybe take some time to understand that actually, posters do not need to do what a random internet poster tells them. And that what is going on in your life and what you would do in this situation does not become true for everyone else.

Practical stuff, like food suggestions, help with the sockets, suggesting selling things and trying to find an electrician are all things people have posted and the OP is doing. But it seems pretty clear she isn't going to contact SS and making sly digs about her prioritising her hair over her kids is pretty low.

I agree tantrums. But I can also see why people are getting pissed off at all the naysaying. It's frustrating.

Free cycle is not a 'charity' thing/just for 'poor' people. It's primarily to stop useful things being chucked in landfill. I've used it for years, and given/got stuff without any judgement on whether it was deserved or not.

If you posted on free cycle that you were looking for a microwave and someone had one, you could then free cycle it again once you didn't need it. You can put it in the bedroom/hall/anywhere, it doesn't need to have a space in the kitchen. As far as petrol costs to collect it, ours is all local stuff, as is the Facebook version of free cycle. People don't give a stuff why you want their things on free cycle, they just want rid of it!

Credit union are for people who can't access other forms of credit. They are great, and look at affordability so won't give you a huge loan/repayments will be affordable.

Thanks Tantrums

Thank you

Just asked DP about your electrics (he is an electrician)

First thing he asked s if you have just moved into the house do you have an up to date electrical test certificate? There should be one of these every time a house is bought/sold. usually a specific of the sale.

If you have one of these you can contact the electrician who did it to advise the electrics are not safe and need checking.
The reason your cooker is tripping the main switch is because it has an incorrect sized cable running to it - usually too big and pulling too much power through causing the circuit to trip out, if there is an isolator switch for the cooker (usually a big red switch above the kitchen counter) turn that to off and that should stop it trying to pull any power through and prevent the rest from tripping.

He said if it continues to do it then another socket is also faulty, you'll need to turn every socket in the house off and one by one try them with a lamp or hoover until you find the faulty ones.

hope that helps a little.

Temp if it is genuinely just a one month issue then I would personally be getting a payday loan so you can get things sorted. In other circumstances I wouldn't touch them with a 10 foot pole but if it makes this month manageable, and you can pay it back next month without leaving yourself short (and having to borrow again, starting the cycle that so many fall prey to) then it is a solution that is available to you if poor credit history means you can't get an overdraft or anything.

Thanks Q will try that again when I get in.

I really can't talk to the school. I can't.

It's easy for people to say " call SS, go to the school, council etc" but the OP may well have a history that means she does not trust those people. Look at her reluctance to share, her fear of her ex stalking her on here. Is it really so difficult for some people to read between the lines? Stop giving the woman grief, she could be scared to raise issues with the school/council/ss as she already has had a flag raised for whatever reason in the past. This info is shared now and if she does not want them around her its her choice. the kids have food so just try to help with suggestions of cooking ideas/methods etc.

And before you all jump on the " But SS are only there to help!" , that is not always true. Sometimes, they get it wrong. If you consider all of the children that have been failed by SS ( baby P etc) then you can at least imagine the possibility that SS has also failed some PARENTS. There are stories on google of kids being taken from their parents for minor reasons and then it snowballing into a battle for custody with exs slinging crap etc.

OP, good luck with it. Cheap sandwich meat and bread, smart price fruit to keep your kids vitamin levels up, cheap cup a soup etc. I'm sure you will get by.