Broke for a month

[Temporarilyskint]

i know the way these threads can go - I am not asking for money and while I think it is incredibly sweet when people offer I won't accept

Sorry for above disclaimer.

Have namechanged as I'm a bit embarrassed and my ex stalks me on here.

We've no money. Well, £40. That's to get through to the end of the month.

We have no oven, or microwave. We do have a toaster.

No access to credit.

Fuel costs are high due to having to take my son to school. Not sure if there's a way around this. (He will hopefully be starting at a new school which is local in 2016 but for now it's tough.)

Fussy cats need food.

Argh. I am partly posting for advice, and also partly for emotional sounding off as I'm fed up of thinking about money.

Like I say, I don't think some of you appreciate property can come at a cost that's higher than money.

If you told me that I could see my dad again for one hour, you could have the properties, all three of them, I'd give you everything, everything, to see my dad again.

I miss my dad so much.

Crikey, op. Yes, your family history sounds tragic, but isn't it time you looked to the future? Go to a credit union or borrow against your property? Why not?

My father died when I was in my early twenties and I have lost other family members to suicide. I know it's hard but it hasn't rendered me incapable of managing my finances or making sure my DC have a hot meal, for crying out loud.

Nobody is saying that it hasn't been difficult, but plenty of people have been through similar hardships without the material benefits you have, and manage to run their lives efficiently and without fuss.

The fact you have three wholly owned properties from which you derive income, and manage to keep horses and cats, means that your issue lies with not being able to manage your finances properly.

It's therefore imperative that you see a financial adviser before your children suffer further. Sorry to be blunt but that's the way it seems to be.

You're working from January, so should be able to pay back a small loan. Get the electrics sorted. Wow, this is nuts!

Everyone agrees that you've had a shit time in the past but it's now time to think about your children. You need to sort this current crisis and ensure it doesn't happen again. Have you spoken to an electrician? With no facility to make hot food I think your children may need to stay with their dad until you're sorted. I think he needs to know what's happening- I know I would go ape shit if I found out my child was living in a house with no electric and the other parent didn't tell me.

Normally I can manage, I don't find it easy to manage finances but I can, and they do have hot meals, it's just the immediate problem - I haven't been giving them shit food for months and months and months. In fact although I don't give them hot meals as I can't I do actually try quite hard to give them a balanced diet, they aren't hungry.

I just don't think I can explain very well - but I can't do anything with the properties just yet as they are in joint names.

Yes I know. I have said that already. Please can we just leave it there?

But nobody is saying you have to sell one of the properties today - they are just saying that, as an absolute priority, you need to call an electrician to sort the electrics out. Now. Not in January when your ijob starts.

Perhaps you should speak to your gp about your current mental health? Do you think you may be suffering with post traumatic stress disorder? If your ex is that bad, I don't understand why they're going there on week ends.

They have to Beebar, they get contact you see no matter what they've done to you.

Seeing gp is a good idea.

Thank you for your help.

Ok. Go to gp, go to credit union. Please. A few hundred will help you get the electrics fixed and see you through til your rental income kicks in.

No leaving I do not dream of the situation which got you to the position you are in, what I said was people dream of the current situation you find yourself in - surely you can see that to those who are on the brink of losing a home, a job, a family, and cannot see past tomorrow with NO assets would appreciate some thought from you also?!

Yes how you got here is a horrible and unfortunate circumstance, but it has happened - and you currently find yourself in charge of 3 properties, no debts, horses, children and the support or strangers on the internet who don't know you from Adam.

If you're home have you tried the socket advice I gave from my DP earlier? that should at least get your other sockets up and running again if the fuse board hasn't completely gone.

I don't have horses at the moment. I'm not home yet but I will do so. I realise in some ways I am fortunate which is why I've tried to stress that this is a temporary problem I need help with.

OP, have you tried for one of those credit cards which has the buy now pay later thing on it? MSN has a list of the best ones. Otherwise you are going to have to borrow on one of the properties to fix the electrics. They have to be fixed. Or move to the flat.

FFS
just secure a loan against the property and your financial situation is dealt with

there are thousands of people on MN who can only dream of owning their own home outright, let alone two others

what you lack is imagination, not cash

Thanks. Electrician reckons it's a fault with an appliance for sure - he said probably the washing machine. It's not an old one so that's annoying but if it needs replacing it needs replacing.

I will remind you again that their dreams may cost them dearly. My dad died at 66 and my mum at 52. My brother was 32.

Yesterday is as past as the Crimean war.
Bereavement is awful
but your kids are alive and need you today and tomorrow
Worry about them not wallow in the past.

I'm trying.

There is a Lone Parent section here on Mumsnet which is a little less judgey than this shameful thread is!

Washing machine sounds odd as thats not the thing tripping it,

but if that is the case - unplug it and everything else should work fine.

if it starts tripping again you need to do as I said, isolate every socket in the house (turn them all off) then one by one turn them on and run something like the hairdryer or hoover from it. Dp said the cooker thing is common if a cooker has been installed with a cable too 'big' (said it's the best way to describe it) for the power and creates a surge which trips the main board.

He said if your fuse board has separate switches for up and down sockets even try turning off the one for down sockets so then you still have you upstairs ones for the evening.

I would suggest you walk into one of the banks in your parents' home town (farmhouse?) and speak to a real person, preferably one who remembers your parents and say "I'm fucked, I need an immediate OD/load against the house".

Home-owners can do this. Those of us with bugger all can't do that.

Ok so
Make an appointment with the GP. That's a start
Do you have any friends you can chat to? If someone I knew turned up at my door and needed to use my cooker and washing machine, I would let them in and not judge in the slightest
Any friends who are electricians or good with DIY stuff that could have a look for you?

Temporarily skint

I get you.

I get why you posted.

I have only read a couple of pages of this as the advice given in some cases was ridiculous.

In practical terms

I can read between the lines on why the kids would not be better off with dad.

Bread and butter babes. Bread and butter.

Just to note also you can pawn things and buy them back at a higherpprice within thirty days.

Also some churches do meal runs in London. But you might not live there.

Just want to say keep fighting.

Irish people survived on nothing but potatoes for years.

You can get through this.

The op can do this. First step is to get some sort of financial help to get electrics fixed. Second step is to visit gp.