Drowning in debt and cannot talk to people in Real Life? A problem shared is a problem brought into perspective - come and join the lens.

[Ta1kinPeace]

This thread is loosely linked to several previous ones on the same topic.

We live in a society that makes it horribly easy to get into debt but makes it incredibly hard to admit you have a problem and even harder to get out of debt.
Everybody is welcome to share problems, ideas, solutions, but not be judgemental please

I am not in debt, any more.
Here is a link to some spreadsheets that might help explain how
SPREADSHEETS-for-Debt-Control-Budgeting-Mortgages-etc

and lots of people use this
YouNeedABudget

The important things to remember are

• yesterday is as past as the Crimean War

( we will not judge how you got into debt, but we will support you on the way out )

• this is an anonymous forum

( we will not tell your employer, family or friends of the reality of your numbers and we are here day and night )

• this thread is about supporting people through the huge mindset changes needed to come out of debt

( feel free to offload all of the feelings that drive you to want to spend, that make it hard to save and that generally make life crap at times, including getting those closest to you to recognise the changes needed )

Join in, bare your soul and come out the other end.
Its worth it.
You are worth it
The long term results for you, your partner, your children, and your friends and family are worth it.

I can't access my dcs savings I did it that way on purpose - I know what I'm like!
Ds1 has £7k and ds1 has £4k up to know. They get it when they are 18.

What is the standing order thing please ?

Updating my situation in the hope of being inspiring to others. Rang the big one (Capital One, we owe thousands) and we are drowning in this one. They have also put our account on 30 day hold and have taken our details regarding our Stepchange Debt Management Plan which we are going to do. I have also rang the electric company and managed to get our dd reduced by £25 a month. I am feeling so empowered now. I was struggling with depression for a while, but even though I am unemployed at the moment I feel on top of things because that is being dealt with. I think otherwise I could easily feel completely swamped by the whole thing. Today is a day for applying for jobs. Updating on here is definitely helping, so glad I found this thread.

That all sounds really positive :)

I am poorly so had to spend £10 at the chemist yesterday.
I will be overdrawn til my child benefit goes on but I'm ok with that.
Very £££ couple of weeks.coming up...ds2s b day and our weekend at legoland.
Its my b day the week after and I am asking for money for some new clothes...mine are a bit threadbare
Still no idea what's happening with dh and work but it's on hold now til he gets back from the states.
I'm in work tomorrow...hope I feel better by then! :(

Its my birthday on the 22nd Badders. I want some new cycling leggings (mine are looking a tad threadbare) They have some really nice ones in Lidl that I have my eye on. Happy birthday anyway, here's to a more positive future. I just hope i don't crash. I am riding a wave of positivity at the minute.

Also, hope you feel better soon badders.

Toastedteacake
The standing order trick is really simple.
If you pop your numbers into the spreadsheet on the thread linked in the OP, you'll see it in action.

Basically, look at what you paid on your direct debit this month.
Round it up to the nearest fiver and set up a standing order for that amount and cancel the direct debit.
Its affordable because you managed it this month.

Because the amount does not drop every month, you pay less interest
and clear the debt in 2 years rather than 18

Well done bear! As soon as you start taking control and talking to the folks you owe money too the easier life feels.

I'm in debt too. Mother of 3, working full time and DH has been unemployed for the past couple of years. So all the bills etc have fallen to me to cover. Whilst my salary is a good one and it does cover the bills, it does so just about which means that any unexpected bills or birthdays etc get put on credit cards. Plus I seem to have a bit of a self sabotage/fuck it type streak to my personality where I am good for so long and then see something I want or want for the kids and I think "fuck it, why not, life's too short...blah blah"

So currently have a 5k loan which finishes in a year and two credit cards totalling 5.5k. Have also been known to use payday lenders when especially screwed and that takes a while to get out of that rut. Plus it's puts a red flag on my credit report...

Bit of a mess really... DH has just found part time work which although it's crap money, it's still going to help a bit.

Hope you're all having a frugal but fun weekend!

We are all feeling ill so very frugal!
I know what you mean about being good for a while then thinking "sod it"

wtfmummy
get the credit cards onto standing orders : if you can, make it be for the "minimum" of your credit limit
as then you can use the card a bit, while knowing that the debt can never "get away from you"

Thanks Ta1kinPeace - will definitely look into that! I've chopped my cards up however in the hope I can just pay them off but the debt doesn't seem to be going anywhere fast.

I tried to get a good %rate loan to consolidate but my payday loan activity has screwed my credit rating unfortunately

If you have cut them up, the standing order method works really fast.
The card company will encourage you to stay on direct debit because they make more profits that way.
Ignore them.

Our minimum cc repayment is £100
We are going to pay £400

Would love some advice. We have a shocking amount - £10k on one card, £5k on another, £3k on another. Overdrafts under control but still in them at the end of the month. Best way to reduce this debt please? We pay just over minimum on the £3k and £5k and try to do double minimum (so about £600) on the bigger debt.

Pseudo
Standing order time .....
Get all three cards onto standing orders ASAP, rounded up to the tenner above the current payment.
Look at the interest rate rather than the size of the debt : throw all available cash at the one with the highest rate.
AND
how have you got there ?
Look at your spending ....

The question of how you've got there has been the hardest one for me because it makes me look at the stupid mistakes I have made. I have found talking to Stepchange really helpful and going through exactly what I do spend on everything.

Most of it is 2 maternity leaves in reasonably quick succession with bad planning. Hands up I've made mistakes. I now meal plan and have a proper food budget, and only pay one lot of childcare as ds has just started school so hopefully I can continue to repay in earnest. This will not happen again.

Badger...no judging on this thread don't worry!
In my case it was moving into a money pit of a house and having to spend £15k on silly things like new roof, boiler etc :)
Oddly I wouldn't mind so much if I'd spent it enjoying myself
That and frittering money on silly stuff.
So I did what everyone advises....made spending cuts. Reviewed all insurances etc, phone contracts, cancelled gym membership, re jigged a new mortgage rate and put the debt on a 0% cc.
Got a (very) pt job
None of it is much fun, but needs must.
Good luck x

Judging is pointless.
We aim to learn from mistakes - so you have to identify what you did that you would do differently and assess your options going forwards
and
on this thread we are very aware that shit happens

Bear you asked up thread about doing a DMP - we did one. It is not easy but it is easier than it all going out of control. It is certainly less stressful than avoiding the phone, door or post. Frugality is your friend. Our mantra became if it doesn't keep you alive you don't need it. I have learnt so many things - gardening, brewing, baking, sewing / refashioning, knitting, forraging, hair cutting, manicures, preserving.

TIP thanks for starting the thread.

lucysmam Scottish Power are all sorts of rubbish, there is a useful Facebook page with experienced members who have suffered due to their incompetence. I would write to the ombudsman and explain what's happened to get your monthly payments down

Hello! I've watched these threads for a couple of months but had my head in the sand not joined in yet. We have around £15k of debt in total between us, all cards, catalogues and a car loan that has a year left. We're very fortunate that it's about 1/3rd of our yearly income so in theory we can clear it quickly but I just can't seem to actually do it. Probably because I spend so much on shit. I'm a binge spender, I go for weeks being really good then splurge god only knows how much on things. In fairness, we usually need them. Recently I've bought a mattress, a fridge, and dishwasher, clothes for the kids, random shite from ikea and so on. I need to sort it out but I need support to do it!

I am chopping up all my remaining cards tomorrow and plan to snowball them. I've worked out that if we pay £500 a month to them all for the rest of the year we can double it after Christmas and have no debt in 18 months time. Something like that anyway. I'm terrible at losing "quality" of life, so although we could do it quicker I'd rather not try as if I feel too restricted I'll over compensate because of feeling hard done by.

Anyway, enough waffling, it's nice to "meet" you all. And Lucysmam do you still need a hoover? If you're at all near the south coast I have a spare one (don't ask) that you can have

Unescorted thanks for your post. I am going on Thursday to open a joint bank account with DP for all our dds to come out of as advised by Stepchange. Hopefully it will be in place by 11th October. I have also started book where I write down every last penny I spend as advised by the OP. I have been avoiding the phone, not opening post. We went to the bank about the ovedraft and they were useless andcould not help us.

notso
You have to teach yourself the difference between need and want
and then to prioritise your want list down to what you can afford.