Debt mutual support thread number 7 ....... Spring is coming - let the sun shine into your finances and your life

[TalkinPeace]

This thread follows on from the last six threads in the series, the most recent of which is here.
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/legal_money_matters/2258202-Debt-mutual-support-thread-number-6-start-the-new-year-with-a-clear-purpose-and-keep-moving-forwards-even-by-tiny-steps?

We live in a society that makes it horribly easy to get into debt but makes it incredibly hard to admit you have a problem and even harder to get out of debt.
The posters on threads, new and experienced, are here to help people get to where they want to be.

I am not in debt, any more.
Here is a link to some spreadsheets that might help
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/legal_money_matters/1987219-SPREADSHEETS-for-Debt-Control-Budgeting-Mortgages-etc

and lots of people use this
YouNeedABudget

The important things to remember are

• yesterday is as past as the Crimean War

( we will not judge how you got into debt, but we will support you on the way out )

• this is an anonymous forum

( we will not tell your employer, family or friends of the reality of your numbers and we are here day and night )

• this thread is about supporting people through the huge mindset changes needed to come out of debt

( feel free to offload all of the feelings that drive you to want to spend, that make it hard to save and that generally make life crap at times, including getting those closest to you to recognise the changes needed )

Join in, bare your soul and come out the other end.
Its worth it.
You are worth it
The long term results for you, your partner, your children, and your friends and family are worth it.

Whoops sorry DS will be 13! scary!

rough you're doing amazingly! Well done .

It's been a long and stressful week. I feel totally out of it at the moment with work, like my brain isn't quite connecting!

Election fever is not helping. Plus, we are waiting to hear back about a job for DH that would make a real difference to us.

I'm feeling thoroughly discombobulated. This means I am not allowed near internet shopping.

Hi there roughtyping - sounds like you've got your head in a good place now : well done

Kinky I'm very meh about the election. DH is fingers and toes crossed that Gove does not return and I'm the same about Pickles

I have found the election stressful. I'm in Scotland and I think we've been protected from the worst of the cuts, particularly as we are lucky to now earn more than the threshold for tax credits, but I couldn't have trained for my profession under the Tories.

wait till the Barnett Formula is unraveled : I give it less than a year
Scotland will be utterly screwed then

What's the Barnett Formula Tip?.

fluffy
Its the amount of subsidy that the English pay to the Scottish and Ulster and to a lesser extent Wales
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Barnett_formula
Its nearly £2000 per person per year going into the Scottish economy ...

talkinpeace I'm assuming that's not 'having a go at Scotland' and simply pointing something out. Not nice to hear we'll be screwed when I'm posting about just managing to get on my feet and have a baby on the way. Cheers though.

And also - why is Scotland always picked out when NI receive more?

'Not nice' wasn't the right term to use - I'm fully aware that things WILL change - but I don't need it pointed out, again.

wish I hadn't asked now.

I live in one of the counties that did the worst out of the last Government settlement. Our schools get less money per child than most of the rest of the country. Our hospitals get less per head than most of the rest of the country. Our roads get less per mile than most of the rest of the country.

Yes, there are more job opportunities in theory but its also very overcrowded and every field is being built on while our roads are already gridlocked.

But hey, at least Gove is not coming back to Education which should cheer up Kinky and all the other teachers

It's all fantastic here TiP...

I think education has lost out under the lot of them interfering over the past decade. Labour started the academies programme. Gove was a menace who has practically destroyed teaching as a profession now. If Nicky Morgan manages to keep her word, address teacher workload and assure the period of stability that she's been promising, things might settle for a bit. However, she is still pretending there isn't a recruitment crisis, which is very unhelpful given that there blatantly is one!

One thing's for certain, I'll be lucky to see a payrise again in the next 5 years. Sigh.

I'm more worried about the NHS given I have close family working in it who are very bleak about its future.

The whole thing is shite, shite, shite. I just hope the left come back better organised and stronger after this.

Hello All,

I was very surprised that the Conservatives won an actual majority and it does make me worry for the most vulnerable. I think I'm going to give myself a week off from actively reading politics though.

Rough well done - I'm very envious. You sound like where I'll want to be. I'll bet you can't wait till maternity leave and your snugly baby! ?? We had very little money when we had our first. The only earnings we had were statutory maternity pay and DH's 18k. With your savings you'll be in a much better position.

kinky I'm right there with you in the school craziness! I think I'm just about ready to kill year 11. They seem to be in a holiday rather than a revising frame of mind! And oh my God the admin I'm having to do!

?? I've had a really bad six weeks I think. I don't know what I'm doing. I spent a fortune early in the month on expensive clothes for the children, shoes (which were at least needed) and all sorts of other bits and pieces that seemed necessary. My spending has gotten out of control.

It essentially means I will only be £60 less in debt this month when my target is at least £300.

I've been stressed and unhappy in work and then suffered an awful virus that knocked me out for a week. I've been really grumpy and maudlin.

I need to get back on track. Debt standing at just under £10k now.

I wonder how fairylea is doing? We haven't heard from her for a good while. I hope you're okay fairylea x

I know what you mean Ursula. I did a critical mock last week with a few and some sat there and wrote nothing. I felt like weeping! Bloody accountability. It's hard work being held accountable for the whims of teenagers .

Be kind to yourself though. This time of year is always really tough. You'll get there .

Also JontyDoggle - is there a baby yet?

Ugh.
My car broke down on Tuesday. Had it repaired today. Bill came to £480.
Its worth £750 on a good day.
Time to sell it before the next massive bill comes in.
If only I could find a car I wanted more than the one I have.

Hello, just checking in, a bit shamefacedly. I was on these threads right at the beginning last year and was doing so well. We have had a baby, moved 300 miles and I am now a SAHM and my finances are taking a definite turn for the scary. I need to come back to the fold and have TiP give me a good boot up the arse. I have lost track of how much we owe, and haven't yet worked out our monthly expenses, so my mission for the weekend is to try and sort that out. Its a bit crap to be back, but nice to hear everyone else is ploughing on. Waves and wine all round.

TiP good luck with your search.

Welcome back pixie. You'll get there.

Oh I was thinking about you and mini pixie! Come back and offload here.

You lot do NOT want to know how much I spent this morning
But my new car gets delivered on Wednesday and the old one goes up on ebay tonight.
I'll be paying cash out of money I've earned in the last few months so that is OK - I guess

Hi there pixiestix
You need to get your head round your expenditure as its very easy to let it creep away from you and then get out of hand.
Sit down with the bank statement and any card statements
and any spending methods that your DH has
and ascertain where you are
so that you can control where you want to be

I was on this thread at the beginning of the year....
My DH had had to give up work due to health reasons.He couldn't claim any benefits as there was a small gap in his NI contributions in 2012-less than £200.We offered to pay it but ere told he still wouldn't be able to claim anything-it would just go towards his pension.
He was diagnosed with osteo arthritis in his knees, and then psoriatic arthritis in his ankles (which is psoriasis in the joints).He now has it in his hips and uses 2 sticks to walk with. He has nerve damage in his eye, and is waiting to see a neurologist.An MRI scan on his back was inconclusive but he needs another in 6 months.He's also under a podiatrist as his feet are in a mess-his arches are breaking down.He is in incredible pain all the time, despite the tablets he's taking. He can only walk short distances and struggles to get up the stairs.He is a broken man-he's always worked, since he was 16 (apart from a short period 3 years ago following redundancy) and always had a physical job. He can't do half the things he used to do, and has a constant round of appointments -sometimes we can't afford the car park fee for him to attend them. It's taking him a long time to come to terms with the fact that he will never be the same again, and will only get worse.
Despite all this, the powers that be have decided that he's not ill enough to claim PIP. He's applied twice, and despite not even being assessed by anyone, they turned him down. He now has to look for a full time job which will inevitably make his health deteriorate but we have no choice-we are behind with our mortgage and my mum buy's food for us.I've even sold jewelry.
We have had the shittiest 5 months ever of our married life.I keep telling myself it will get better, but I think I'm kidding myself.

Even our tax credits were stopped-we rang them when DH stopped working,assuming that they would help-but it's based on last years income so the amount we were getting stayed the same,even though DH had no income whatsoever. He rang them several times, and in the end they looked into it again-which resulted in them realising that they had miscalculated the amount we were getting,and it as stopped completely in March.
And because we don't get any benefits we can't claim other things like council tax benefit, free prescriptions etc.
It was my son's birthday last week and my daughters this week and I've sold jewelry that DH gave to me for my 40th to get them a little something.It's not fair they should go without-they go without so much already-and the predicament we're in isn't their fault.