Debt mutual support thread number 7 ....... Spring is coming - let the sun shine into your finances and your life

[TalkinPeace]

This thread follows on from the last six threads in the series, the most recent of which is here.
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/legal_money_matters/2258202-Debt-mutual-support-thread-number-6-start-the-new-year-with-a-clear-purpose-and-keep-moving-forwards-even-by-tiny-steps?

We live in a society that makes it horribly easy to get into debt but makes it incredibly hard to admit you have a problem and even harder to get out of debt.
The posters on threads, new and experienced, are here to help people get to where they want to be.

I am not in debt, any more.
Here is a link to some spreadsheets that might help
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/legal_money_matters/1987219-SPREADSHEETS-for-Debt-Control-Budgeting-Mortgages-etc

and lots of people use this
YouNeedABudget

The important things to remember are

• yesterday is as past as the Crimean War

( we will not judge how you got into debt, but we will support you on the way out )

• this is an anonymous forum

( we will not tell your employer, family or friends of the reality of your numbers and we are here day and night )

• this thread is about supporting people through the huge mindset changes needed to come out of debt

( feel free to offload all of the feelings that drive you to want to spend, that make it hard to save and that generally make life crap at times, including getting those closest to you to recognise the changes needed )

Join in, bare your soul and come out the other end.
Its worth it.
You are worth it
The long term results for you, your partner, your children, and your friends and family are worth it.

Well done Jonty good luck with the labour I wish I was back there such a magical time

Exciting Jonty! Not long now.

Hi Snowie and Battenburg. Apologies for missing your post before - you delurked to total silence!

Birthday twirl. Feeling full of cold and very old this morning. Dragging myself in to what I hope is a swift and painless day at work! Celebrating at home as my frugal plan is kicking in. Plus, feel so grotty it wouldn't be much fun to stay out. DD bought me a DVD for my birthday, so having homemade pizza, she is making cherry pie for my 'cake' and we can watch the film together .

Happy birthday Kinky.
And a three day weekend to go with it !

I'm having my birthday party this weekend - had though of using caterers but my stinginess won through
so am catering 40-50 people for around £250 on food and another £300 on booze which feels about right.

Just wish the weather forecast for tomorrow was not so crap. Hey Ho.

WELL DONE
To all those making progress not just on paying down debt, but also on the mindset changes that make this the for ever session.

I want to thank everyone on this thread and its previous incarnations-I carried the same level of debt for years, because I could always make the minimum payments I never saw it as a problem.

The threads made me look at it-I now have a plan - so far this year I have reduced my debt by almost £3000. I should be debt free in 18 months. My mindset is completely different.

Nishky
That is fantastic news.
Making the mental leap from servicing debt to getting rid of it is hard.
And your life will be better in the long term for having done do.

Thanks Talk I can't believe how much better I feel-Its a feeling of being in control

Kinky - ditto here I have an awful sore throat I feel like I'm swallowing glass !
I'd also like to echo gratitude for this thread. Tip & kinky especially who gave me great advice to shift my mindset also which led to paying off my CC in total & not having one first time in 2 decades ! Long way to go but feeling so much better too. We can do it

Nishky that's great. I wondered whether this thread was sort of dying out now. But it's good to know others are changing their ways too.

My debt is now £13.3k. Projected to pay off by July 2016 (down from 45k)

DH should be getting a bonus. I've changed my job.
Job change means childcare costs reducing
Job change is closer to home - reduction in fuel costs
DH now cycles to work each day as children don't have to be dropped at childcare providers. Another reduction in car use.

Really enjoying using YNAB. Completely works for us. No money fights whatsoever now.

Happy Bank holiday everyone!

No money fights whatsoever now.

Lying that is amazing, you have done brilliantly. Hearing about what other people have done is really inspirational.

I had a £300 car bill last month and would have put it on credit card without thinking 12 months ago. I paid in cash, the rest of the month was very tight, but I made it.

Little victories like that keep me going!

Jonty good luck for delivery day, how wonderful a new baby is!!!

Nishky - I should be quick to point out we sold 2 new cars. We've replaced them with older ones, so that was a very quick win!

Hi there moneytalks
Welcome to the gang : 0% card sounds excellent
the high mortgage less so!
but you have a plan
and hopefully the energy of the thread will keep you going on even the worst days

Hi and welcome Money .

Hope you're feeling better Snowie and thank you for the mention . I don't think I achieve much on here apart from admitting failure . However, when I review how far we've come, it is a good distance.

Hope all is well with you too TiP.

Well here's a nice bit of news... We had a big household item turn up yesterday. It had our name and address on (most people get it wrong!). It's an item we don't need (think dishwasher). We were really baffled.

Turns out DH won it in a random magazine competition!

So we researched it and I've just stuck it on eBay for a 99p start price, cash on collection. Minimum effort. Rrp is about £300!

Knowing my luck it'll sell for 99p then the buyer will want a refund.

I posted back in March re DH running up a surprise 4k overdraft comprised mainly of interest and charges. Shortly after this we had a very traumatic experience which actually helped us get our relationship back on an equal footing on all issues, including finances.

All is well now and I'm pleased to say we've made quite a few sustained changes, eg been using YNAB with the result of avoiding going into the red at all, transferring all debt to 0% cards, switching utility suppliers etc.

Bizarrely we've actually been spending more money on important things - bought a new and desperately needed car and are doing some home improvements - but this works for me as it feels like we finally have our priorities in order.

Obviously a new car is a big outlay but on the plus side I'm still nervous about taking it out on my own so we're spending much less than usual on fuel and going out, and rediscovering ways to pass the time at home with a 2 and 3 year old

Thanks for everyone's support, will try to make a habit of updating more regularly now.

well done lying

I won a posh hardback cookbook in a magazine comp and gave it to someone as an xmas gift

I am struggling with getting DH to sit down and budget with me. He keeps saying we will "save in September/later" etc. I want to save now, even if it isn't as much as we'd like, not wait for some magic month where there are no unexpected bills (i.e. never).

I'm doing extra hours and saving all that income and also saving my "pocket money" towards a new computer, but I want to save from our joint income for a house deposit ... he wants a house too but he grew up in a financial wasteland with two parents who never had any money and didn't care about debt etc, he just doesn't see the point of budgeting.

twomoreminutes
It sounds like you are getting the mindset issues in place : well done.

peonies
he'll get there. TH property ladder is so hard to get onto now : but once you own a house you can change it to be how YOU want it
get him to start thinking what he'd do to your current place if he owned it ,,, that might start the ball rolling in the right direction

TiP if you have time this lady needs serious advice!! www.mumsnet.com/Talk/legal_money_matters/2372293-OH-in-a-lot-of-debt-Need-advise?

well spotted Peonies : we'll get her back on track

When I wanted a house I started viewing them, Dh got the bug because of the way showhomes are presented. It's all very "wouldn't you love to live like this?".

It focused him. Where we rented wasn't very nice in comparison. I purposely rented it though so he wouldn't get too comfy there.

Anyway, that's what worked for us.

Hi I think I was on one of these threads ages ago, I was on a DMP at the time and was really struggling. DMP is finished now - it was around £5k that I had to pay off - but just couldn't cope with the payments. I had been a single parent, living alone, at uni etc and it was all too much.

So DMP is paid off, still have an old student overdraft to pay off but that currently sitting at under £900 which is great. Hoping to pay off the remainder with savings after next payday.

DH has a couple of things to pay off - overdraft of around £800 and CC of around £1k - so that'll start next.

I'm currently 14 weeks pregnant so we're saving around £600pcm just now - using that to get debt out of the way as I'm terrified of it being there while on mat leave which is silly - just think it's a psychological thing!

Aim is to go back to Florida with DS (will be 12) and the new baby (under 2) by Oct 17 without being in debt. Fingers crossed!