Debt mutual support thread number 6 ....... start the new year with a clear purpose and keep moving forwards even by tiny steps

[TalkinPeace]

This thread follows on from the last five threads in the series, the most recent of which is here.
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/legal_money_matters/2193736-Debt-mutual-support-thread-number-5-the-light-at-the-end-of-the-tunnel-is-NOT-an-oncoming-train?

We live in a society that makes it horribly easy to get into debt but makes it incredibly hard to admit you have a problem and even harder to get out of debt.
The posters on threads, new and experienced, are here to help people get to where they want to be.

I am not in debt, any more.
Here is a link to some spreadsheets that might help
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/legal_money_matters/1987219-SPREADSHEETS-for-Debt-Control-Budgeting-Mortgages-etc

and lots of people use this
YouNeedABudget

The important things to remember are

• yesterday is as past as the Crimean War

( we will not judge how you got into debt, but we will support you on the way out )

• this is an anonymous forum

( we will not tell your employer, family or friends of the reality of your numbers and we are here day and night )

• this thread is about supporting people through the huge mindset changes needed to come out of debt

( feel free to offload all of the feelings that drive you to want to spend, that make it hard to save and that generally make life crap at times, including getting those closest to you to recognise the changes needed )

Join in, bare your soul and come out the other end.
Its worth it.
You are worth it
The long term results for you, your partner, your children, and your friends and family are worth it.

I did, yes, but I just couldn't get on with it.

Hello All,

baddz yes lock it away or you'll fritter at least some of it which is what I always do

Fairy It's great to hear you sounding more positive. I think everyone is right in saying that you can't let your house keep making you unhappy. I need to tell that one to myself! You sound like you are beginning to take control

Jonty your poor little dog!

I'm doing okay. I think that my new meds are really starting to kick in now as I feel a lot less anxious.

I've been doing okay money wise. I've had to buy DS some new school jumpers and DD needed a couple of warm pieces of clothing too as she just refuses to stop growing. It's been freezing here. I took advantage of M&S 20% off on Monday.

So ... we're having a quiet weekend to offset the clothes spend. We might go to the local swimming pool tomorrow, but today it's films and a picnic style lunch at home. We really needed to have a proper tidy up anyway.

Got my weekly ALDI shop for a family of four in at £67. Pleased with that.

Big decision made here. We're going to sell the other car . Basically it should lop another 6k off the debt.

We're going to downgrade - well kind of... An older but more fun car.

Hi my name is andsmile and I have 28k debt (yes thanks to the overdrafts and tax bill) Payday been and gone - 24 hours and all the money has shot out of my account already. I have no pocket money this month because I ate out last week into my overdraft £100ish, nursery costs have increased and we have visitors commng.

The latter means I need to keep money aside for some things we have planned. Just meal planned for this comming week have a £26 shop tomorrow and a £46 shop next Friday - so that's half them months worth of food. They are very boring....added in a risotto I suppose.

I've planned half term. If anyone is midlands here is some stuff that may interest you for a cheap half term. I've planned this thinking I will need to keep petrol, parking costs and of course packed lunches where needed:
(DD will tag along to whatever or be in nursery so the week is planned aroundDS (9))

Monday

www.libraryofbirmingham.com/event/Events/stones&bones

www.libraryofbirmingham.com/event/Events/stringsclub-16feb15 - there are still free bookable places left in second workshop!!

Tuesday

Claymodels - he's been asking about this (about £3/4 to buy)
Swimming - part of gym membership so sort of free..

Wednesday

There are three events here that we will goto costing £4 for both kids

www.birminghammuseums.org.uk/events/search?utf8=?&event_type_id=&venue_id=1&audience_type_id=2&start_date=15%2F02%2F2015&button=

Thursday

Do some cookery thing at home
Swimming again - might invite a friend unless I have fainted from an overdose of minecraft updates.

Friday

ikon-gallery.org/event/art-explorer-fridays-6/ -free!

I can't stop fantasy shopping but a quick look at spreadsheet has me back to reality.

andsmile for cooking at home mine still love decorating biscuits. Just buy value rich teas and mix some icing, maybe sprinkles or smarties on top too. What about making play down do? I have a recipe if you'd like it.

Oh thats a good idea jickjack We have lots of playdoh for DD. This is proper clay that air dries...I cut do some sort of paper machie project I suppose that would be cheaper...maybe a fossil from the previous days objects.

Play down do??! Obviously, I meant playdough! Doh!

I meant Im def gonna get the biscuits - I have lots of decorating stuff in already.

Also, try kids cinema....cineworld are cheapest esp if you register. Or buy a cheap DVD or rent from library and make homemade popcorn for a movie day.

What about building an indoor den?

Thanks everyone for week wishes for our dog, he's had a nice bath and blow dry today to get all the mud off him from where the dog rolled him around the floor, and he's back to being his usual chirpy self, although a little bit clinger than usual.
Lying - changing cars and lopping off the debt is great as long as the older car you are buying isn't one that comes with lots of repair bills!
andsmile sounds like you have great plans for half term, and your spreadsheets are keeping you on the straight and narrow, so that's all good!
I've just spent a huge amount of time plugging info into the HomeBudge app (I'm using this instead of YNAB, as it works as an app on my iPad and iPhone, and syncs between both, which means at home I can look at iPad and see trends/ reports etc, but when I'm out I can enter expenses as I go on phone - I think it's going to work for me). Mostly it has made me scared and given me a slight headache...it doesn't help that we have so much going on in our lives, which makes things so complicated: DH has main job and then gigs on top, so two incomes, I have main job plus rental income, so then outgoings for our house and rental house, plus outgoings for dog and my horses, plus costs of things for new baby on the way, plus paying off debt and corporation tax, plus saving for maternity leave. I feel a bit like I'm in the middle of a whirlwind......also, what's annoying me a bit is I'm trying to monitor bank account, but the 'total available' in online app seems to take account of things the bank have 'earmarked' for removal next day, but aren't showing up in list of transactions yet - so I lok at the total and think it isn't right, but when I look next day I see something has come out and now total works, so it's really hard to reconcile... Humph. Just feeling a bit overwhelmed by it all I think. Feel like I spend half my life planning money, meals and shopping now. I don't like being an adult...(and by the way, I'm 37, I should have got used to it by now!)

Ok that should say well wishes, not week wishes!

Treasure hunt in the garden? How old is your DD?

Glad your dog is feeling better jonty x

Jonty - that's the beauty of YNAB. You can't look at your current account and think 'oh I have £500 in there but I need to pay for Shoes, and has the electric bill been paid? YNAB sorts it for you. Would you do the trial? I'm such a convert!

YY to buying an older car with more problems. That was always my fear, but my theory is that it's unlikely to cost 6k in repairs, so we should still be up on the deal by being debt free sooner.

Fingers crossed anyway.

we big non den building bu havnt done this for a while.. so yes couls iclude this. we do movie nights every week. I think I have enough in there. I just dont want to slide into a week long console game fest. We have my DD's party and a day out to a theme park the first weekend so a couple of quieter days in wont hurt. I will be chaining him to the bloody xbox by the end of week though

balls - sorry for mistakes. Thank you jickjack - I think Im a bit lazy for outdoor stuff in cold/wet weather.

I have a income and outgoings spreadsheet..what does YNAB have over this?

Gawwww this winter is dragging. I know it is mild but I want spring to be here.

Oh just try it andsmile! Honestly 30 day free trial, do the classes too - it's an epiphany I tell ya!

I have always had lovely spreadsheets but honestly this is so functionally better. Especially as there are apps to support the software.

I tried it last year and didn't get on with it but this year I really made myself try again and I'm completely sold on it.

andsmile have you made salt dough before? That air dries/bakes really well

Ok I shall try YNAB thanks for encouragement.

favourite really?! Ok thats another few quid saved and a trip to the shops.

I've worked out - all being well and going to plan - we could pay debts off in 2 years, then start on Mortgage overpayments - possibly paying off in 5 years. So in 7 years could be completely debt free inc mortgage.

Question about moving mortgage Mortgage is with NRAM (Northern Rock)

Option A -

Move mortgage now and save £200 per month. We would then be with a mainstream lender. Fixed rate for two years then shop around again. Mortgage overpayments capped at 10%

Option B -

Stay with NRAM as they allow unlimited overpayment. So while more expensive in shorter term, the ability to massivelt overpay would save a hefty amount interest.

This is based on current income. If DH gets his next promotion due 2017 we cold pay it off a lot sooner. DD also starts school, so no more childcare. I may be able to get workt hen too.

My only thing is how hard it will be to live with fading decor/carpets/furniture. I've managed 6 months with buying no clothes but I'm not sure how long I can last longer term when items really do need replacing. DH will need new suits for work at some point. Two growing kids.

andsmile could you just put say £50-75 aside per month that you earmark for 'extras' like suits, kids clothes etc when you need them every few months? It wouldn't hit too much into what you're paying off, and you'd feel like you have the money when you need it...

I know...I used to have a clothes budget row and partys/incidentals/school trip..toruble is Ive culled so much and poured into overpayments.

Need to have a rethink.

I wish I knew what this pay rise is going to be. If its my most optimistic we can afford extra overpymants on cards and mortgage - dying to get going with that.

Should hear re job tomorrow.
If I get it;
First pay will be paying off my overdraft - £200
Then paying off the next account - £400
I need to renew my passport - £75
I also need some major dental work doing -£??
I will still have no money, will I? :(

Lots of busy people.
I love the fact that you all cheer each other along and I dip a toe in every now and then.
It really, really proves that the mindset changes are working.

Baddz You'll have no extra money for the first month or two - but after that ....
andsmile remember not to even mentally spend money till it actually hits your bank
foudre not moving but sorting the house is a good call
lying I was looking at new cars last night - mine is 17 years old - and the only one I liked was a newer version of what I have ! Sad muppet me.
jonty Your dog will forget sooner than you will. Hope you are both feeling better.

Spent this morning sorting out my veg garden plan and getting seed trays in under cover to start filling them during the week.