Debt mutual support thread number 5 .... the light at the end of the tunnel is NOT an oncoming train

[TalkinPeace]

This thread follows on from the last four threads in the series, the most recent of which is here.
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/legal_money_matters/a2142758-Debt-mutual-support-thread-number-4-every-journey-starts-with-the-hardest-first-step

We live in a society that makes it incredibly easy to get into debt but makes it incredibly hard to admit you have a problem and even harder to get out of debt.
The posters on threads are here to help people get to where they want to be.

I am not in debt, any more.
Here is a link to some spreadsheets that might help
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/legal_money_matters/1987219-SPREADSHEETS-for-Debt-Control-Budgeting-Mortgages-etc

and lots of people use this
YouNeedABudget

The important thing to remember is

• yesterday is as past as the Crimean War

( we will not judge how you got into debt, but we will support you on the way out )

• this is an anonymous forum

( we will not tell your employer, family or friends of the reality of your numbers )

• this thread is about supporting people through the huge mindset changes needed to come out of debt

( feel free to offload all of the feelings that drive you to want to spend, that make it hard to save and that generally make life crap at times )

Join in, bare your soul and come out the other end.
Its worth it.
You are worth it.
The long term results for you, your marriage and your children are worth it.

My mum lives on her own and is on pension credit and is just awful with money... she has no idea how much she spends in tesco and will just throw stuff in the trolley. I opened the door to her fridge the other week to make a tea and she had literally about £80 worth of meat in there - for just her!

I keep asking her to come to aldi with me but she is very snobby despite constantly moaning she has no money and if she does come she prods everything like it's going to bite her.

I spent £60 at aldi today for the weeks shop and mentioned it to mum and she said "Oh it's good for families like yours..." as if I'm a leper for being poor ... ! She's just as poor as me!

Rant over. Anyway.....!

Fairy that is crazy! I can't bear waste and £80 of meat for one person sounds like it'll be going off very soon.

Lots of people wrinkle their noses at aldi, but, it keeps the queues down.

True fluffy :)

Yes £80 worth of meat is ridiculous. She's not very elderly either - she's 64. She's just stuck in a rut of buying too much and not meal planning. Her diet mainly consists of meat, potatoes and whisky!

When we lived together I came home from work once to found she'd spent £250 from our joint savings pot on getting someone who'd knocked on the door to cut down a bit of hedging at the back - that we couldn't done for free! She felt sorry for him!

That and money generally were some of the main reasons I couldn't live with her anymore (she used to live with me when I was a single parent and I used to work full time - she looked after dd for me).

£80 of meat would go straight into the freezer. everything that can be frozen, is. we like to buy th reduced stuff- we can buy stuff we wouldn't normally buy a dn stuff that we wouldn't be able afford.

heating - we too have those velcro duvets- 4.5 tog plus 9 tog = 13.5 tog. fab.
but we also were bought a6tog goose duvet for our wedding present, and it manages to keep us warm in winter too, with just a lit blanket on top.
our other trick is co-sleeping. we're really warm with the hot water bottle that is dd inbetween us!!
dh is a postire, so he gets to dictate the heating - i used to complain and object when i first moved in, but he is outsie all day earningmoney, so deserves whateer heatinghe needs!
having said that, we do have a thermostat, and he only puts the heating o to get up and in the evening. (i put it on if i'm cold in the day, but usually i put extra layers on) no heating in the kitchen of bathroom. oh, and we have radiator with no control at the bottom of the stairs, which doesa really god job ofheating most of the house.

my good news for today, mybe the week, is that the branch manager of my bank asked me to look at mycredit card again. we were supposed to meet beforei went away, but i just didn't have time, so we met today.
i've had my credit card put onto a loan - changing the interest from 24.9% to 4.9% (which had we met last week, it would have been 6.5% )
and they've put my current loan onto it too, which was 8.9%.
it IS over 5 years, but my cc weould have taken longer than that to clear, even with my £200 a month.
the new repayments are £185 a month, rather than the current £274 plus £200, and basically, the child tax credits and child benefit pays for that! they've also reduced my cc limit to £1000. (one of the terms to get them to approve it) i don't need that now i've not got the shop.
and there are no early repayment penalties, so i can pay off more when i want, or a lump sum if i want.
i feel so much better- like there's actually that light at the end of the tunnel!!
the main thing is the monthly amount is so much less, which gives me more freedom and means i don't have to panic moving money from thsaccount to that account. it also means that dh doesn't have to give me money to put on the debt, unlessb he wants to! becausec my current monthly income is more than enough fdor the necessary payments!
the daft thing is that the new amount is less than the amount i was already paying on my cc - even with the current loan being on there too!

just used this site to work out how long my cc would have taken on £200 a month - 74 months.
so i'm saving £15 a month on 14 months' payments, plus what i'm saving £274.40 on 12 months left of the current loan.

Good news nickel.

Anyone seen the mse newsletter this week? They are suggesting people reclaim credit expert charges.

So, that's my Wednesday afternoon planned then.

nickelbabe my spreadsheet covers both repayment methods

i know, but i wanted a quick calc.
new loan - total amount £11220.60 at 60 months of £187.01
old loans - 9 months of £274.40 (i actually though it was till jan 2016, but branch manager said 9 months) plus 74 months of £200 (or 60 monts of £219.70) = £17269.60 or £15651.60 at the larger monthly amount.

i didn't do your spreadhseet because i knew didn't have any options and £200 was the biggest amount i could afford on the cc (whilst still struggling wth the £274.40) - previously my lack of income meant no loan possible.

even paying £274.40 a mmonth on my cc (41 months) will be £11250 in total.
(assumming that amount straight way rather than waiting for the end of my loan)

Hi still juggling stuff about but have made all new payments CC's for the second time of new budget. Have still moved stuff around.

Never feel like I have a normal month..there is always something pops up. Ive cleared a remaining balance of £60 off a card, not budgeted for but then had to re-use that immediately to pay for a food shop.

Ive shifted that much around and have took to counting miles on petrol info against what trips I need to do - Month ends with a half term just before payday too. I have this planned re activites all booked/free but there is always something..I maybe havn't got enough petrol.

I'm beginning to question some parts of the budget. Is it too tight or is this just how I need to be from now on. Still think we m aybe sould cancel a holiday but DH works so hard and its used as real family time - guaranteed away from emails/phones/train delays.

Heating been on in a few blasts

Well done nickel :)
It's my b day today.
I have told Dh he is limited to £20 for a gift for me so we are off to town so I can go to lush :)
Forgot to say...ds2 needs glasses :( luckily the ones he likes are free with the NHS voucher ....phew

Happy birthday badvoc

I looked at my bank account this morning and feel very :( ... its now at £1500 overdrawn. Even though I know it should slowly work itself out of that when you see that amount glaring at you in the bank account you feel pretty crap. When I think how long it's going to take to pay it all off - that and the credit card - I just feel immensely down. And angry with myself for getting like that in the first place.

Just needed to write that down.

Happy birthday Badvoc
Fairylea - could you convert the o/d to a loan ?

Happy Birthday Badvoc!
Fairy lea....snap! I know how awful it is looking at the overdraft at that figure, ours is the same x

Happy Birthday Badvoc - hope you are al feeling better or maybe a delayed celebration.

Fairylea Between us DH and I, over two accounts that is, we have O/D worth 7k we used to pay about £70 per month in charges but not this has more than doubled with the banks new 'tiered' charging system.

I was thinking about trying to re-do payments manually until eventually they are reduced and the balances onto credit cards if we have cheaper rates. I think DH has an offer on his to transfer cash to bank accounts at 6.6 for the life of balance - I dont even know where to begin to work out if this would be cheaper.

Happy birthday Badvoc

Happy birthday Badvoc

Thank you all x
I have managed to get £100 from the house insurance towards a new wedding ring!!

Overdrafts are the pits.

Happy birthday Badvoc

A new wedding ring will be lovely! My engagement ring needs re-golding - it only cost £400 and is looking a bit on the well-loved side!

I have just put all my credit card balance onto my own bank account overdraft - just so I wasn't paying several lots of monthly fees. I am trying to throw everything I have at paying it all off and it's really firing me up to have a goal.

Happy birthday Badvoc

We put our outstanding cc debt onto a loan.
It was a really cheap deal @ 4%
Has 2.5 years left to run but we have already paid off £2k :)
It feels good to know it's going down every month.
This month will be rough as it's a 5 weeker and then of course it Xmas (!)
However, I find that even with things I have to buy (like ds1s new pants) I really look for bargains and think about what I am buying and why.
So....I got £20 worth of pants from m and s for £7 !!
I got a group on voucher and waited til the 60% off sale :)

Met DH for a coffee earlier that turned into lunch and we sat and added up menu items and discussed what pot of money to pay from.

I'm sorry for moaning but I fed up of looking for every penny. I cautiously put half a tank of fuel in. I need it to last 2 weeks.

Anyway everyones agreed to veg and omlette for tea so I've 'saved' a meat meal so will go further into next week.

I dont think I have any bank charges this month as I left car deposit sitting in the account..see even as I type that it all sounds wrong.

Least the change in the weather is tricking me into thinking I have 'new' clothes to wear.

£20's worth of pants made me giggle - Im good at getting bargains like that, just need to know when to stop.