How much does his ex really get?

[WaspFactory]

How much money does a single parent get in benefits? I ask because my partner is paying his ex over the odds in maintenance because he thinks she is getting next to nothing. However, a friend of mine says his ex gets more money than him due to the amount of benefit she receives.

Can anyone tell me how much (roughly) per month it's possible to get as a single SAHM with one child? Bearing in mind that she is living in their old house with a mortgage on it?

That poor child. I am glad her father is making a proper contribution.

No more so than any other step parent. As a previous poster said, if you choose to be the second wife you have to accept the existing priorities .

Hopefully he shall forver remain guilty and continue to provide for his dd with his ex. If it wasnt for you she would still have the two parents in her life, and would have a more comfortable life than she currently is.

If you dont like how much he wants to provide for his child, then you have an option. Go and sink your claws into another sucker.

Just remember, that karma is a bitch and will ocme back to bite you in your arse.

It does sound rather sad, OP, if you are feeling tick-tocky and your boyfriend is feeling guilty. I can see entirely why you would want to post on MN for advice.

I thnk the best advice is to take things slowly, and always put the existing DC first.

Nah, Booyhoo's not bitter. She contributes lots to many threads on MN to the benefit of the MN community. Some people on the other hand are just takers.

The idea that lone parents might be out 'getting drunk all the time' - is that projection?

I take it all back after continuing to read the thread.

read the thread starrsmummy.

xpost.

Starrs you'll find that happened to a lot of reasonable people today once they read the OP's later comments.

actually not much point reading the thread. half of it's been deleted so it doesn't make sense anymore.

I was going to post some helpful advice but now after reading the entire thread in one I'm to to be helpful.

oh thanks line

And on the issue of lone parents and non-essentials.

If I earn, say, £1,750 a month, and ExH gives me £150 a month for two DCs, and I separately choose to spend £150 a month of my own money on non-essentials, does that mean that my ExH is subsidising me 'getting drunk all the time'?

Hardly.

It means I am bringing up his DCs very well, on my own. His pittance doesn't even scrape at the gas, electricity and broadband bills.

But it suits him to say he gives me a 'fortune' that I spend on getting pissed.

I remember when my ex got a girlfriend (I say got, I think he may have already had and that it just became apparent to me when they decided) and the first thing she started niggling him on was how much money we had agreed on for maintenance. It's sadly fairly common.

I can never quite decide how to spend my £5 a week

Doesn't cover my fags and booze requirements adequately

What does xpost mean?

It means you posted before reading what someone wrote while you were typing.

I figured it out......cross post so proud of myself (or just as dumb as op)

RTFT took me a bit of working out when I first saw it

OP at least if you do have a child with this man you can do so safe in the knowledge that he'll pay for it should you split up.

It's cute, though, isn't it?

If you allow yourself, say, one bottle of wine per week, and your ExH pays a fiver a week, then he can say, 'She spends ALL the maintenance money on drink'.

Irrespective of your own income that pays for actually raising the DC.