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The puddytats police problem - long

125 replies

puddytats · 07/03/2006 20:25

Hi all

Many apologies for my silence, life has been hard recently. For those of you who are kind enough to remember or might be interested here is a recap:

DH and I had our 2nd child in May last year. After a month off DH returned o work (a company he has worked at for 6 years) to be called into a meeting and suspended due to discrepencies on a client he worked on. In due course he was found guilty of gross misconduct and fired. In the meantime the olice were also called in as it would seem that monies had gone missing. A fake case had been set up and dh had apparently done this, done all the work, written cheques and taken the money.

Everything is in DH name, all the evidence points to him. Some of the money even touched our bank accounts before it was immediatly transferred back out again. DH was arrested and taken in for questionning. I was also arrested and also questionned.

We have been interviewed by the police a couple of times and the case has now been transferred to the cps to decide whether we should be charged.

The bank has done their own investigations and concluded we are guilty and closed our account, refusing to give any further info as we were in the wrong. We cannot do any investigating or prove ourselves innocent unless we are charged as we have no legal rights to anything.

We also have a cilvil case against us trying to recoup the monies we were supposed to have taken.

Neither dh or i are guilty, you just have to take our word for that.

Ds is now 2 and dd is now 10 months. Our lives stopped 9 months ago and we are unable to start living again until all is over.

Someone out there has set us up, we never saw or spent the money. Someone has decided to destry our lives and don't seem to care that innocent children are involved.

DH and I are still together and stronger than ever, They will not destroy us and one day life will be normal again.

If you have got to this point thank you for reading.

OP posts:
starlover · 07/03/2006 20:30

you're so brave

Stylish · 07/03/2006 20:30

Have followed this Puddytats, but not posted before. Just want to say xx

LIZS · 07/03/2006 20:32

Have you now been formally charged yet? Can your legal representaitve start to investigate and prepare a defence once you've entered a plea ?

Sounds a horrible situation .

puddytats · 07/03/2006 20:32

If not for the children, i would have crumpled. And there have been times when i thought ending it all would be the best thing to do but I have a fantastic extended family and a fantastic support netork of medical help.

They will not ruin the lives of my children

OP posts:
Piffle · 07/03/2006 20:32

I remember this puddy, have wondered about you from time to time
I am glad your relationship is holding up and I hope you're doing ok. Have you any news on recourse or defence as yet?
Hugs
xx

puddytats · 07/03/2006 20:33

No, likely to be formally charged on 28th March when we have to go back to the police station. Then we can start working on our defense

OP posts:
Mirage · 07/03/2006 20:34

I wondered how you were Puddytats.What a strong woman you are.I do hope that both your innocence is proved & you can move forward.

puddytats · 07/03/2006 20:38

I am not strong. I am so scared that eith dh or both of us will go to prison. What will i do on my own, how will he cope, how will the kids cope, how will our relationship survive? I am so full of questions and yet never find answers.

Every day is precious as we don't know what the next one will bring. I just want it all to be over

OP posts:
starlover · 07/03/2006 20:40

i just feel so :( and SO SO SO Angry on your behalf!

I just hope to god they find the bastards who have done this to you...

you are strong... really! I'd have crumpled a long time ago I think

ponygirl · 07/03/2006 20:44

Puddytats, I'm so glad you came back. I've wondered often how you were - and so have others. You and your dh do sound fantastically strong. I'm so sorry that this dreadful thing has happened to you. I hope that when you can start your own investigations, you'll be able to find some answers. It sounds as though the company/police/bank have just looked for evidence that you and your dh are guilty, not bothered tp look for another perpetrator. There must be a trail that you can follow. I'm sending you every possible positive vibe that you get through this and clear your names.

Do keep posting, there's lots of support here for you. Please stay strong.

puff · 07/03/2006 20:48

I've been wondering about you too puddytats.

Do you have good legal representation in place? I know you were looking for specialist lawyers at one point.

It must feel like a waking nightmare Sad.

I'm glad you have good family support to help you cope with this.

Hausfrau · 07/03/2006 20:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Miaou · 07/03/2006 20:55

puddytats - thank you so much for posting this - a lot of us have been thinking about you and the nightmare you are going through.

I am so, so sorry that this is happening to you. I can't believe that someone out there is callous enough to ruin the lives of an entire family. I am so sad for you all.

I'm really glad you have got good support around you. You have our support on here too.

puddytats · 07/03/2006 20:57

We have got the best representation we can. The only person who is not supporting us is DH father who is embarressed that his son could bring the family name into such disrepute. As far as he is concerned if dh is found guilty that is it.

Luckily he is the only one with this attitude.

OP posts:
puddytats · 07/03/2006 21:00

Miaou, my faith in people has completly gone. I no longer trust anyone and believe anything. I feel like my innocence has gone and i want it back.

The why us quesstion is always there, what did we do, we have lived life 'properly' bought house, waited till we could afford children, had good careers. My one bit of advice to anyone is never put anything off as you never know what is round the corner

OP posts:
jambuttie · 07/03/2006 21:39

This needs closure for you and dh aswell as your little babies hun.

I hope all the hope I have that the f**r that has done this too you gets caught out very very soon to save you any further distress

busybusybee · 07/03/2006 21:52

Hi Puddytats - I am so sorry to read of your situation.

Something very similar happened to me and Dh 5 years ago. He had been working for about 18months as a community leader basically.

Soon after we purchased our first computer and hooked up to the internet, someone got our details and started making fraudulent telephone calls/internet porn sites etc.

I had a terrible time trying to persaude BT it was not us. We received solicitors letters demanding the money. I spent a whole year focused on trying to sort it all out. Eventually dh's employer decided to pay the bill £550.

A few weeks later he was suspended from work (one week after we announced I was pregnant with our first child). Throughout prengnancy I was cying and struggling almost every day.

Eventually dh was forced to resign. If he had admitted guilt he would not have lost his job Shock Dh refused to admit guilt cos he wasnt. Thankfully it never became a police matter. Chiefly cos his employer wanted to hush things up!

We moved home when I was 8 months pregnant. It was awful. After 4 years we have now managed to rebuild our lives again. There is hope!

Dh has never managed to clear his name and he will never be able to return to what he considers his true vocation in life, but we like you havent let it beat us

{{{{{{{{{}}}}}}}}} love BusyBusyBee

puddytats · 08/03/2006 07:51

Busybusybee, thank you. I am so glad that you have managed to rebuild your lives.

At the moment we are happy that dh has time with the children that he otherwise would not have had and may lose out on in the future.

OP posts:
Hulababy · 08/03/2006 08:15

I hope you can get this sorted out. So sorry. I can't understand how anyone can be so callous as to try to destroy a family in this way.

LadyTophamHatt · 08/03/2006 08:24

Oh, blimey Puddytat....I was so pleased to see you name here again. I honestly thought it was going to be good news.

What an absolute nightmare for you all.
It's outrageous that you cannot have access to information on your own bank detail unless you've been charged. I utterly stunned at that!

I hope you get some answers soon and the people who did this are caught.

batters · 08/03/2006 08:56

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

oliveoil · 08/03/2006 09:10

I have been wondering about you too.

I mentioned on your last thread, are you ok for money?

I am sure we can sort out a kitty for you if need be, a fighting fund or whatever.

xx

cod · 08/03/2006 09:12

do you have any idea who did htis or why?
it shoudns shite.

prettybird · 08/03/2006 09:24

I was wondering how you were.

In a strnage way, at least being charged will take you out of limbo and allow you to work on your defence.

Presumably, you would then be able to get see things like the signatures on the accounts that were set up in your name - and get handwriting experts to analyse them?

Glad to hear your family, with the expcetion of FIL, are being supportive. WIll he come arounf if/when you rpove your innocence - or will the relationship have been irretrievably damamged?

As Cod asks, do you have any suspsiions as to who could be behind this?

foundintranslation · 08/03/2006 09:33

Oh Puddy. :( Have been thinking of you often and hoping events had taken a positive turn.
As Prettybird says, ironically, being charged could be just what you need in this situation, as it will allow you access to evidence.
How strong you sound.

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