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Miscarriage/pregnancy loss

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Yesterday I had miscarried- today there is a heartbeat

82 replies

cupofteaplease · 15/04/2009 13:27

I have posted this on my ante-natal thread, so appologies for repeating myself.

Basically I had a scan 2 weeks ago that showed a baby with heartbeat, but 2 weeks smaller than I was expecting. So I had another scan yesterday at the same private clinic and she informed me that the baby had died. No heartbeat was found, so she referred me to the EPU this morning.

The lovely sonographer was very matter of fact. She said she appreciates that when these things happen you just want them over with quickly so you can move on. I totally agreed. But she had to do the scan to confirm everything and prepare a report for the doctor. So she did the trans ab scan and could not see clearly, so she appologised for needing to do the TV scan.

She started the scan and showed me the sac which she said should look like a balloon, all round and taught. She explained that mine was deflated as if it was 2 weeks after the party. We all had a bit of a laugh and she took the measurements. She was pointing things out and explaining what was what. Then she moved the probe around and showed me the 'fetal pole' from a different angle, as she explained it was lying on a vessel, so she needed another view of it.

Then she stopped and spun the screen back to her. She was pulling lots of confused faces and called her colleague over. All of a sudden they both said, 'mmm! Oh!' and then they spun the screen back. She said, 'do you see what we see?' dh said yes and began to well up, I hadn't dared look until now- so when I glanced at the screen I was very surprised to see a little heart pumping away.

I got a bit 'cross' at this point and explained that I didn't understand because my baby had died. She said, no, as far as we are concerned, there is a heartbeat so your baby is still alive.

SO, the upshot of it is- baby seems to have got smaller since my first scan 2 weeks ago, and is only measuring 3mm. However, they were really disgusted with the private sonographers measurements from the 2 scans, apparently she had typed up things on the report that were an impossibility. However, the baby has grown a small amount since yesterday's measurements.

I said to the sonographer- so, basically there is still a heartbeat but the baby is too small so it will probably die anyway. She said, 'I'm not saying that- you are!'

Afterwards with the nurse, she had her little wheel out and was trying to convince me that my dates could be out (but agreed that a 3mm baby could not be 7 weeks, which is the absolute miniumum I could be if my dh had miracle sperm that lasted 10 days lol!) But she swore that 'miracles happen all the time, God willing.' She said the heartbeat was not slow or irregular.

My dh is adamant that everything will be ok, maybe the baby is just small. I am not so sure as I don't want to get my hopes up. After all, I was told yesterday that the baby had died. I also do not understand how a 3mm baby can have a heartbeat.

I have to go back for another scan next Wednesday and take it from there. But apparently, my baby is still alive and I am still pregnant. So overwhelmed, I just don't know what to think.

Anyone with a similar experience? Any advice- obviously prepare for the worst?

OP posts:
jardins · 23/04/2009 11:30

Dear Cupoftea we are all with you.

orangehead · 23/04/2009 13:59

I have onlyjust read this, I am so sorry about your loss and your experience. Sending you hugs

cupofteaplease · 23/04/2009 18:19

I would just like to say a lovely big thank you for all the fantastic support on this thread- it has been a real comfort to come here and offload.

A big thanks to those posters who have shared their own experiences of MC and early pregnancy problems. Although it is sad that so many people have been through the same thing, it is comforting to know that we are not alone

OP posts:
Jacksmama · 23/04/2009 18:29

((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((HUG)))))))))))))))))))))))))) all the way from Canada.

for you.

ra29needsabettername · 23/04/2009 18:35

Such a painful thread to read so I can't imagine how it must have been living it . I'm so sorry and hope that you have some support around you.

SesIsCountingdowntheweeks · 23/04/2009 18:41

Just adding my hugs and thoughts for you.

It seems so cruel that so often mc also comes with such a rollercoaster.

Look after yourself and keep posting if it helps.

Amapoleon · 23/04/2009 18:47

So sorry

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