How long to wait

[WolfMother326]

Hello,
I have just had a confirmed loss at 8.5 weeks. I think it happened just under two weeks ago, as I has a good early scan at that time and then immediately after started to lose symptoms. 2 days ago I started cramping and bleeding lightly. Today I had a scan at the EPU and there was no heartbeat and the baby was measuring under 6 weeks (despite having measured healthy at 6+4) and the sack had collapsed and womb full of blood. The EPU said I couldn't have any medical management and to wait it out.

I'm bleeding a bit more now but not a lot, just feeling sick and crampy.

my question is how long should I expect to wait to pass everything? Thank you.

[Hollycharlie]

@WolfMother326 so sorry for your loss. It’s a terrible thing to happen to anyone. I had a mmc at 11 weeks on 7/8, had a second scan in 10/8 confirmed it, started bleeding lightly that Thursday night. Was ok until Sunday then I had pains badly and lots of bleeding Sunday & Monday. Tapered off , and I thought it was over but woke up on the Friday morning with lots of bleeding then I felt a golf ball sized piece of clot come out and after that the bleeding stopped. So all in all start to finish 8 days. I’d say make sure you have a lot of pads available as I was shocked at the amount I bled. I heard nothing from the epu or my doctors, the care has been shocking. Hope you’re receiving more help than I did. Big hugs I’m sorry if it sounds brutal. X

[worldwidetravel2017]

Just had an early miscarriage myself

Still bleeding but its lessened

Get lotsa pads - lotsa chocolate & lotsa ginger biscuits - take it day by day

[WolfMother326]

Thanks @Hollycharlie I'm sorry for your loss and that you were so unsupported. I also feel frustrated not to have been given any options and just told to wait. The waiting feels distressing.

@worldwidetravel2017 those are good tips- I've got 2/3 just need the ginger biscuits :)

[Whataretheodds]

Sorry for your loss. Did EPU explain why they wouldn't allow(?) Medical management?

[Whataretheodds]

(I'm afraid I can't suggest how long - I've never done expectant management alone)

[BadHairBae]

So sorry, OP 😔

I remember I was signed off for 2 weeks upon the discovery of no heartbeat. I waited it out at home and the pregnancy passed on the 2nd week I was off.

[Hollycharlie]

@WolfMother326 I think by the sounds of it you are on the way to miscarrying naturally, and if you can wait it out I’d say if you want to try again soon that this would be the best option. I’ve read lots of people having problems after d & c or tablets, but for me it seems to all be ok fingers crossed . X

[WolfMother326]

Thanks @Hollycharlie thats a really helpful perspective and I hadn't thought of that. We do want to try again as soon as we can.

@BadHairBae thanks for sharing your experience. I'm pretty sure the heartbeat stopped over a week ago. I'm already bleeding a little but I think it will be a few more days.

[CluelessInLondon]

@WolfMother326 Can't answer your question as I am going through the same right now (sounds like we are having quite a similar experience, although I've been given information about management options in case they are needed after I have another scan next week) but I remember you from the due in April thread on the pregnancy forum and just wanted to say I'm really sorry for your loss. Look after yourself xx

[WolfMother326]

Hi @CluelessInLondon I'm sorry you're going through this too. I think if I need medical management I can ask for it later but was also told to wait a week. I'm actually away from home visiting my in laws in Wales, so I need to call my home hospital and make an appointment for a second scan. I hope you're doing alright and getting a lot of rest x

[WolfMother326]

Still waiting and bleeding and cramping, day 6. Have another scan on Tuesday. All so odd

[worldwidetravel2017]

You might stop bleeding tomorrow

Took me 7 / 8 days

[CluelessInLondon]

@WolfMother326

Still waiting and bleeding and cramping, day 6. Have another scan on Tuesday. All so odd

I've been bleeding for a week now but never very heavily - it's really unsettling not knowing what's going on and whether it's going to happen "properly" or not before my next scan.

[WolfMother326]

@worldwidetravel2017 @CluelessInLondon I don't think I've passed the pregnancy sack and embryo yet. I've just had mild bleeding. So I'm just kind of waiting around for the main event and feeling rubbish.

[worldwidetravel2017]

@CluelessInLondon

I've been bleeding for a week now but never very heavily - it's really unsettling not knowing what's going on and whether it's going to happen "properly" or not before my next scan.

Have u asked them to re test your hcg

[worldwidetravel2017]

@WolfMother326

@worldwidetravel2017 @CluelessInLondon I don't think I've passed the pregnancy sack and embryo yet. I've just had mild bleeding. So I'm just kind of waiting around for the main event and feeling rubbish.

Regular paracetamol - chocolate - candles - hot water bottle - nice take away - fav music

[worldwidetravel2017]

Gynae advised me today to take floradix from asap - floradix liquid - - will help keep all the important numbers up next time

Also ordered a private thyroid test from boots online ..

Was my first miscarriage

Apparently NHS do more tests after 2 miscarriages
But not after 1 as ' one is so commonn'.apparently

[Hollycharlie]

@WolfMother326 it was day 8 the sac passed for me, but lots of cramps/pain for a day a few days before. X

[CluelessInLondon]

@WolfMother326

@worldwidetravel2017 @CluelessInLondon I don't think I've passed the pregnancy sack and embryo yet. I've just had mild bleeding. So I'm just kind of waiting around for the main event and feeling rubbish.

Yeah, same for me - passing a few small clots and stringy bits but nothing more significant. I keep expecting to see more blood and being surprised it hasn't really got any worse.

@worldwidetravel2017 The EGU won't do anything else until they've scanned me twice - so I'm just in a holding pattern until next Thursday, waiting to see if anything happens in the meantime. It's one of the most rubbish things about it - I'd love to get some normality back and can't right now.

[WolfMother326]

Thanks @Hollycharlie, I know it will eventually ramp up and I've read a lot of people saying it was around day 8 or 9.

[WolfMother326]

@CluelessInLondon I'm sorry you're having to go through the wait too. It's so rough. Are you considering medical options or set on waiting it out? I feel like my appointment on Tuesday will help me feel a little more in control even if nothing has changed just because someone will make sure its all OK.

[WolfMother326]

@worldwidetravel2017

Regular paracetamol - chocolate - candles - hot water bottle - nice take away - fav music

This is such a good list of self care ♡ I got very nice Chinese last night but I need to replenish my chocolate!

[sweetiepie33]

I was 12 weeks and had slight brown spotting the Friday night, which continued till Monday, we went for a private scan which confirmed baby died at 8+3, that night I started cramping and bleeding about 9pm and it went on till 6am. Went to EPU at 8am and they confirmed most of baby had come away, I bled and cramped till the Friday (not heavy) then Fri night I passed what I think was the placenta and the pain stopped. Bleeding eased off and I was back in work Sunday. So about 8 days for me here.

I had a scan at 8 weeks & baby was measuring lovely and had a strong HB. Although my symptoms literally stopped a few days after my scan which I now know why, I googled it and most answers were it's normal but if it was to happen again (I'm currently 6 weeks PG) then I'll be ringing the GP and explaining.

Hope you're okay and sorry you're going through this x

[CluelessInLondon]

@WolfMother326 I'm leaning towards surgical management if nothing moves on by the time of my next scan - the lack of certainty makes me feel anxious and makes it difficult to move on, so I think I'd rather go with whatever will help to resolve it quickest. If nothing has changed by next Thursday I'll have been in this position for nearly 2 weeks so I don't think I could deal with trying to wait longer! How about you, do you know yet whether you want any medical/surgical management?

[WolfMother326]

Hey @sweetiepie33 that's very similar to me in a lot of ways, just you were further along. I'm really sorry you had to go through that.

@CluelessInLondon I'm thinking I'll wait it out, but I will get advice at the EPU on Tuesday. I'm in Wales right now visiting my in laws so I went to a Welsh hospital and they said I couldn't have medical management (yet? Not sure if they would after waiting a while?) But I'll be back in Sussex by Tuesday and will see what they have to say. I would maybe consider the d & c if they think it's best, but I've seen a friend take the pills previously and she was so ill it was just awful, I'd rather not add in vomiting when also having to pass everything inside which is unpleasant and painful enough by the sound of it. I hope things speed up for us both soon so we can move on.