MMC at 12 weeks

[TheDaydreamBelievers]

Hi,

We unfortunately found out at our 12 week scan that baby had no heartbeat and was measuring about 10+4. We had a scan (NHS - they had our dates wrong) at 10 weeks and all looked great.

They have offered 3 options - see what happens naturally, medication to induce misscarriage, or surgical under GA.

I have the booklets with the medical perspective but was wondering if anyone has had this experience at similar dates and would/would not recommend any of these. Obviously the added covid19 bit is that for either medical option my DH couldnt come to be with me.

Many thanks x

Good Luck @pumpkineverything a rubbish day but hopefully you will feel you can move on with your life a little bit after today. So sorry. You're being so strong, you'll be fab!

Hope you are ok @PumpkinEverything. I had a medical management on Friday and although it's been emotional, it's good to be able to put this part behind me. Thinking of you today xx

Thank you so much @Emilu89 @babysnowman just recovering on the ward now, and hoping I have no issues so I can get home today. Hoping that I can finally start to mentally move on after this as it’s been a long two weeks

@PumpkinEverything wishing you a speedy recovery. I did feel a big weight off my shoulders after the procedure was done, although you still may have the physical and emotional affects for some time I found for me emotionally that it does begin the start of the closure process.

@PumpkinEverything I hope all went well. Take your time afterwards. Physically I feel good but emotionally it is catching me by surprise occasionally

Thanks so much @bez91 and @TheDaydreamBelievers for sharing your stories along the way. I really don’t think I’d have chosen this option if it wasn’t for you two and my SIL, as I thought it was scarier than it was until I got other people’s experiences so I truly truly appreciate it during a time when I felt so alone and had no one who understood what I have been dealing with properly. I really feel like this was the best option for me now that I’ve had it and I already feel like a weight has lifted as I can stop worrying so much and hopefully be able to walk further than 1km from my house! Feel exhausted now as I haven’t slept right in two weeks, and I have some lower back pain, but other than that I feel fine. They said everything went well and just to keep an eye on my temperature, pain and bleeding for the next few days and to test a PT in two weeks.

@PumpkinEverything you and I can share recovery and getting back to a negative test .

So far have had no pain issues but one evening of heavier bleeding (after a lot of exercise). Day 7 after the op and I'm still having a tiny bit of brown red blood on wiping but zero on underwear (no such thing as TMI here!). Tested positive still at 1 week after the op, will see next week for week 2!

Haha @TheDaydreamBelievers I feel like this whole experience from TTC to now has put TMI out the window hasn’t it! Even talking to my best friend about it I feel like there is no longer a line 😂 really glad to hear you’re recovering well. Have you been wearing a pad all day since? It’s never usually been my choice for periods so I feel like this is new to me, and even standing in the shop to buy some last week you’d think I’d never bought anything like this before as I had to read all the labels. I only bought the ultra x night time ones thinking this would happen naturally, so think I might need to get a few different absorbency types in the shopping this week

@PumpkinEverything don't mention it 😊 I too have found it very helpful. I know a couple of people who have had miscarriages but no one who had a MMC so it's been invaluable.
@TheDaydreamBelievers I did a workout yesterday and bleeding increased quite a bit, some of me is wishfully thinking that means it'll be over quicker 🙈
I'm testing tomorrow as it will be 7 days post procedure x

@PumpkinEverything you sound like me, I spent about ten minutes in Tesco looking at pads 🙈. Anything fragranced doesn't agree with me and most seem to be fragranced and it doesn't tell you that on the packaging.

@bez91 it's good we can all work through this together - a little club we never wanted to be in! But still good to have the support. I ran this morning and it doesmt seem to have abused anything so hopefully that was a one off!

@PumpkinEverything same, I'm not a pads woman (usually mooncup). I bought the ultra sleep ones but really did not need them, even on the one heavy evening! Now using the Always 2and from lightest ones. Although I dont have one on at all today and nothing has hit pants.

@bez91 in a bittersweet way, I hope that my experience will be helpful to any friends that this happens to and that they’ll be able to talk to me. Oh are they? I didn’t even think about fragranced! Will have to keep an eye on that as I’ve really sensitive skin so I’d say that won’t agree with me either.
@TheDaydreamBelievers hope I have a similar experience with the bleeding and that it’s not too heavy! Thankfully we do the shopping on Wednesdays so I’ve not long to wait before I can get a few things.

Glad to hear about you both exercising. I was doing the sweat app during the first lockdown but then fell out of the way of it, and then when I got my BFP I felt like I couldn’t start it as there was a lot of jumping in the BBG Workout and I didn’t feel up to it. I downloaded it again last week during the Black Friday sale and am hoping to start one of the programmes again in the next few days once I feel up to it, I’ll just maybe modify it a bit.

@PumpkinEverything TMI but anything fragranced just gives me instant thrush 🙈 in lockdown 1 we could only get hold of fragranced loo roll so I had a terrible time with it 😆 ahhh it was Sweat I was doing up until 4/5 months ago when I got my first BFP. It was that I did yesterday starting from scratch and I hurt today. Treat yourself to a chilled evening after today!

@PumpkinEverything hope you're feeling ok this morning? Are you working?

Took a test this morning (1 week post procedure) still positive and very strong one

@bez91 same for me one week after - just as positive as pre-procedure

@bez91 I have taken all this week off work thankfully, and I was off last week too. My manager has been really really great with it all, and I’ve never taken time off sick before so I know he knows I actually need it. I’ll be working from home the next few weeks anyway so I’m glad I’ll be in the comfort of my own home. Feel fine physically so far, just a little bit of back pain and I’m still pretty tired! I tried to go for a walk last night and felt like lead by the time I got back in the house.

I haven’t actually taken a pregnancy test in weeks so not too sure how strong mine would have been beforehand. Can I ask what both your pregnancies were like? For me I barely had any symptoms other than bloat and sore/full boobs. I never had nausea, sickness or food aversion or anything like that. I know not everyone experiences but I do wonder if it meant something was wrong. Those few symptoms that I did have disappeared a week before I found out, which matches with when they said they had stopped growing so it makes sense.

@PumpkinEverything I had few symptoms- burpy, solid sore boobs, tired. The solid boobs went away after surgery (although my husband thinks they are still bigger). That said, my mum was also symptomless through 2 healthy pregnancies (and has never had a miscarriage)

@TheDaydreamBelievers I've just come across your thread - we've spoken previously on the Scottish first trimester thread. I am absolutely gutted for you and I am so very sorry to be reading this. Feel free to pm me if you ever need to vent. Big hugs ❤️❤️

@PumpkinEverything that's good that you have the time off. Re pregnancy symptoms I had about the same compared to when I had my daughter. Not much nausea but mega aversions, fatigue and the bloating was unreal, so much so that I wore maternity jeans a couple of times. It was when all that stopped and my belly just shrunk and softened that I thought something wasn't right and booked the early scan x

Good to know we all had sort of similar! I still feel so bloated and I’m finding it hard to know whether it’s because of this or my diet and I need to cut down on bread, as it’s driving me crazy! Feeling a bit ugh about my body today and feel like a big blob! I know I need to be kind to myself while I’m recovering and I want to give it a few days before trying to workout, but I hate feeling this way 😔