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Miscarriage/pregnancy loss

Find support and share your experiences on our Miscarriage forum. See also legal rights and support after baby loss.

Original poster

Recurrent Miscarriage Support thread 14 - tests, treatment, trying again

999 replies

Justonemoretime · 29/11/2014 17:38

Information, support, hand holding, tea, sympathy and a hell of a lot of combined knowledge - all welcome as we try to make sense of the RMC roller coaster of tests, NHS admin, heart ache and (hopefully) happy endings!
Please start with a recap of your stats :)

OP posts:
TinyTear · 16/12/2014 17:00

Yay just and belle!!!!

Catlover2014 · 16/12/2014 17:01

Excellent news Just, I'm sure the bloods will be fine too. Hugs xxxx

Flen · 16/12/2014 17:01

Hi all, been lurking, just wanted to say a quick yay! for just and Belle. And also tiny I am so sorry to read about your grandma, lots of hugs.

Sasha, hooray! Loved what you wrote.

{waving} to everyone else. Got my blood tests on Thursday, starting to get a bit frustrated by not being able to ttc again. My solution is that we are getting a baby substitute kitten.

charlieis30 · 16/12/2014 17:07

yay just SO pleased for you!

Original poster
Justonemoretime · 16/12/2014 17:15

thanks everyone! Charlie, I don't think I gave you a Grin yesterday? Sorry and Grin to you. My head has been all over the place.

OP posts:
Catlover2014 · 16/12/2014 17:33

Hi flen that's what we did with my cat and she has been a great distraction from the waiting and worries. My DH works long hours and she's always kept me company! Fully recommend it Xmas Smile

Hope you get good news with your blood results and can start the new year armed with a plan.

XxX

TinyTear · 16/12/2014 17:35

And Belle, my NHS results this time were 1 in 980... But the harmony was clear...

Belleende · 16/12/2014 18:10

So pleased just. I hope you get your bloods through lightning fast. I don't think I will go for harmony with odds of less than 1 in 2000, not sure I can hang on til feb for another scan tho, so could be tempted. Hmm mm mm.

bootles · 16/12/2014 18:18

belle you just brought tears to my eyes. I am absolutely thrilled for you. Indeed, this looks like it is happening!! They sound like good odds to me

just more water in the eye here, wonderful news!

Marchgirl · 16/12/2014 18:55

Yay belle and just. Great news again.

Sorry you're struggling with the waiting flen Sad. I can definitely identify with that. To Give you an idea of timescales, my bloods were taken 21st nov and the clotting result came back 3 weeks (plus the weekend) later . They are apparently going to run the karyotyping (yay!) and that should be back before Christmas, so within 5 weeks. My scan will be this week (4 weeks after the bloods, although presumably this one will vary a lot). I'm not sure if that helps much, but sometimes it helps me if I know the timescales

Was thinking about my superstitions last night cat, on the back of your conversation and I realise that subconsciously I have made one as well, but in the opposite way. I've convinced myself that now my curtains are nearly finished, I'll be allowed to have a successful pregnancy, because if I hadn't got them done before I had another child then it'd probably be 2 years before they were finished. This is sounding utterly ridiculous as I write it, and obviously the lack of finished curtains did not cause my last 3 miscarriages, but I'm pleased that it's turned out to be a positive thought, even though it's totally bonkers. Maybe trying to make yours into a positive superstition would help

Purplefrogshoes · 16/12/2014 19:15

Yay belle and just and Yay for all the good scan news last week

tiny sorry about your grandmother

Hugs to those who are finding things difficult xx

bakingtins · 16/12/2014 19:19

Yay just more positive news Smile

Sorry you are finding the waiting tough flen it is really frustrating. Try to see each appointment as a step in the right direction. Will you see a RM doctor on Thursday or is it just literally to be drained dry?

Marchgirl · 16/12/2014 19:43

Just read back over my last post and it didn't sound very positive, sorry flen. What I meant to round off with was that this means you could be ready to try again in 4 weeks. I know that seems horribly long when you are so keen to get on with it all, but like baffling says, try to count off the positive steps you are taking towards your next pregnancy being successful

Marchgirl · 16/12/2014 19:43

Sorry baking, not baffling!!! You are anything but baffling

Catlover2014 · 16/12/2014 20:22

March whoop to good superstitions and how nice to have new curtains. Keep smiling, good things ahead! Xxx

Flen · 16/12/2014 21:10

Thanks for the good wishes everyone. baking literally just draining me on Thursday, I think. Though we also hope to get some answers about what happens next - it's not been massively clear what the procedure is (eg. dont know if we are having a scan to check uterus shape).

March that is helpful, thank you. We were told the results would be back in six weeks, but we also have a consultant appt four weeks after the tests, not sure if that's a mistake on the hospital's part though! The difference between the appt being in four or six weeks is the difference between trying in Jan or Feb though! These are all questions I will ask on Thurs if I can...

Flen · 16/12/2014 21:12

Oh and cat that made me smile! We lost our old cat three days days before miscarriage three, so getting a kitten has multiple meanings! I think the distraction will be very useful (and delightful!)

longestlurkerever · 16/12/2014 21:13

Ps march I understand that feeling. it's very hard to contemplate ttc again with no different a plan than before. I found reading prof regan's book helpful. It gave me an explanation at least, in terms of a hormonal problem, if not a cure, and gave me the strength to try again knowing it really was another attempt, which might fail but might not, rather than another foolish errand doomed to failure. Big dilemma re going for more tests though before ttc again. I didn't, and it paid off but I might have decided differently if I hadn't been going away at the crucial time and if my cycle hadn't been so frustratingly long.

Good plan re kitten flen!

16 week appointment tomorrow. Bit nervous. Think I am feeling movements now but scared dr will tell me I must have imagined it as there is no hb. Must try and be more positive. Sounds ludicrously gloomy and borderline paranoid when I write it down but am genuinely scared!

longestlurkerever · 16/12/2014 21:18

Flen just to say I had a normal scan at st Mary's which showed up pcos and a slightly arcuate uterus so they referred me for a saline scan where they get a better idea re shape. I got my bfp before I cpuld have it though oops but in my defence the sonographer had written that it wasn't impacting on the uterine cavity and the dr said second scan was very much a precaution.

bootles · 16/12/2014 22:36

Good luck for tomorrow longest, I'm certain that the movements you are feeling are not imaginary!

flen the waiting is so tough. I was always very keen to get going and couldn't stand it. Its so personal to decide whether to wait or not. In the grand scheme of things, waiting takes less time than another mc. I don't mean it to sound so blunt, and I didn't always wait when I should have done. But the times I did wait, that rather cold logic seemed to help somehow.

Marchgirl · 16/12/2014 22:52

I would say they will probably have your clotting results back before the appt flen and maybe the scan results if you are having one. Do you know if they are planning to do karyotyping on you? Our psc (epu) told me they don't advise waiting for the karyotyping results to come back before trying again as they can take a long time and if it is something genetic then there isn't any treatment as such, only counselling (that's if they even do the karyo bloods).
I've decided not to wait for these results as it wouldn't stop me trying again Anyway and we wouldn't go down the selecting embryos route. It's such a difficult thing to decide, but if that's the case for you as well then you may be on for January.
Have you had your results from the foetus yet? I hope this will give you some answers, or at least some closure when it comes x

cloudjumper · 16/12/2014 23:35

Excellent news, just and belle!!

Flen · 17/12/2014 07:53

March no karyotyping as we did get the results back from the foetus and it was normal. Had mixed feelings about that, but in the main, was very relieved that it rules out genetic counselling etc and also that it wasn't one of the "bad luck" chromosomal abnormalities. On the other hand, it means we don't know what caused the m/c (and maybe we never will...!)

Think we will make a judgment call re: ttc in my January cycle. What it would mean is that by the time we have the consultant appointment to review blood results, we might be CD27 ish with a possible BFP. But obviously only if we catch! So many ifs....

Flen · 17/12/2014 07:57

bootles exactly that! That is what I keep telling myself. I know it's ridiculous, but I also don't want to get BFP in March as that might mean a December baby, and having been a December baby, I know how pants that is! I can't believe that is still even in my mind given that at this point, you'd think ANY baby would do! Lifetime of joint birthday and Christmas presents evidently....!

TinyTear · 17/12/2014 10:42

My sister is a 23dec baby... We always made a point of separate presents and separate gift wrap... Yes, it is important not to use Christmas giftwrap for birthdays!!!!!