Recurrent Miscarriage Support - tests, treatment, trying again - thread 11

[bakingtins]

Welcome everyone - pull up a chair! A thread for anyone who has suffered multiple miscarriages and is in need of information, moral support, tea or sympathy. Newbies very welcome.

Can we start the thread with a recap of where we are all up to again, please?

Cat, so sorry. hugs. look after yourself. xx

Thanks tiny. I'm seriously thinking we may be better to adopt, just wanted to give birth so badly. I look almost yellow this morning, red acne spots all over my face and a banging headache. Not sure how much more my body can take. X

Thanks tanny and just. A childless life feels so awful to me. I just don't know how to cope with the reality of our situation. Feel so bad on DH, he'd be a dad by now if wasn't with me. I'm such a freak!!!

(((hugs))) cat, please try not to be so hard on yourself. I am sure it will happen. There are so many options to explore. Take time for yourself and maybe talk to someone about feeling unhappy and coping. A sad state of mind won't help, so if you can find a way to find some peace, hopefully the rest will fall in to place. xx

Don't lose hope Cat, I got BFNs until my AF due date both times (even later the 2nd time)

Cat it sounds as if you are emotionally knackered, you poor thing. I think Just is right, some time and regrouping might really help. Easy to say I know.

All I know is that I needed a break from TTC for a few months, even though at the time it felt like the last thing I wanted. I felt as if it was the ONLY thing that mattered and that my life was shit without it. I hit a really low point, and couldn't face much at all, but I needed to get though that and reassess what I had and what I could do for myself.

I don't know where you are in this process, and you can have totally different views, which is fine, but I hope you find the time for some healing and to not beat yourself up over this. IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT.

Big hugs x

Thanks everyone, you're all so lovely.

I am having counselling and trying yoga too. Mostly I've been feeling better this last month but I think knowing I've gotta watch the growing bump at work all over again has set me back. See my counsellor Monday so we'll have to look at some coping mechanisms.

charlie yeah I will try a test again in two days. There's always the small chance and I'll cling to it for now!

XxX

remember, too, if it is a bfn, you'll be feeling hormonal (actually, either way). So you'll probably feel better in a couple of days if af arrives. xx

Just felt some kicks for the first time, feint but definitely the real thing. There's no one here to tell, and I'm crying cos I never thought I'd feel this again. Oh god, let this work out...

Oh cat, sending hugs. Don't let this get you down - try and distract yourself by doing something enjoyable. It is not over until you decide it is, remember that. In the meantime, like just said, there are many other options to explore. Or, like tanny, maybe you just need a break from ttc - it can make a massive difference! Hope you're feeling better soon.

charli I know it's not easy, but try to relax. There is nothing you can do right now, what will be will be. Curl up on the sofa with a blanket and some ice cream/chocolate/cake and watch a feelgood movie. In any way, the worst will be over after Monday.

tiny I was on 2x 200mg cyclogest, too, so it's a perfectly 'acceptable' dose I think that doctors are in two minds about it - my consultant said I'll get it again next time I'm pg, but he seemed to be more of a 'it won't do any harm' rather than 'it will make all the difference' attitude. I also don't think that low progesterone is my problem, my levels were very good when I had it tested, but I will take it religiously again, no doubt.

I am waiting waiting waiting... temps continue to be elevated, but I only finished the antibiotics yesterday, so it remains to be seen if they had anything to do with that. I won't be testing for about week at least anyway (9-10 DPO today). Trying not to get my hopes up...

Tanny and ((hugs))

Oh tanny how beautiful!!! So happy for you! X

Oh tanny how beautiful!!! So happy for you! X

Aww cat - it is a difficult time but just remember that things can only look better from this low. I agree with the others - maybe a break, even if if is one month may help you get to a better place.

Tanny - how absolutely wonderful. So pleased !!

Tiny - how are you coping?

Charlie - same here erpc scares me. Good luck for Monday or hopefully things will happen themselves over the weekend. My very close cousin is an anaesthetist and today has been telling me what an easy procedure it is!! He does several GA for Erpc everyday and recommended GA to me over LA. I am booked in for Friday!

Just, jbrd, Bootles hello! I still need to catchup on how you guys are doing :)

Great Tanny!! I didn't feel anything until 18 or19 weeks last time.

Triple, thanks for asking. I'm OK... Just hanging on.. Have a scan on the 20th to check all in right place and then start heparin . hope it won't be too late...

Triple I had a three month break after my last mc. Don't feel I can afford to wait around anymore. I think it's probably the fertility drugs knocking my emotions around but as I'm unable to conceive without meds it's a necessary evil for me.

Tiny waiting for that first scan is so frustrating. Try to enjoy lots of nice treats and chocolate along the way. 20th will soon be here!

Waves to all you lovely ladies xxx

Hello all.

cat so sorry you are feeling down. I always have a massive dip when I get a negative test when TTC, and that's without having the additional factor of the fertility drugs. I echo what everyone else has said about it NOT being your fault, and try to give yourself a break. This is the first month of TTC isn't it? Post mc/and on new cycle of drugs? Try not to pressure yourself - remember not many people fall pregnant the first month of trying. Also agree with what has been said about it not being over until you decide it is. Its such a personal thing. I can't help but feel you have a good chance of a happy ending. Glad you are seeing the counsellor though, hope they help with it all and the pregnant colleagues xx

Tiny - hope you are sorted on the meds now, and the time to your scan speeds by.

Tanny that brings tears to my eyes it really does :). How is your head doing?

Charlie hope your weekend is going ok. Be good to yourself. To you and triple, I think its really normal to be scared, but an erpc is a straightforward procedure. Only takes about 15 mins I think. Just the GA aspect that makes it last a bit longer. You will both be absolutely fine.

triple when is yours? I'm ok thanks, bleeding finally stopped, and yet another (hopefully final) scan on Tuesday to check again its all gone. Urgh such a long process from start to finish.

jbrd keep us updated..

Apologies to anyone I have left out, hi to all

Thanks bootles I know have to just stay positive!

How are you?

X

Hello all, I loitered here a while ago but I think I may be back... I got home yesterday after mc4 in hospital. After the first 3 I went to St Marys but their standard tests didn't find anything. I usually mc at 7-8 weeks without a good strong heartbeat so this time we thought we'd cracked it when we got to 9 with all looking good. But a mmc was diagnosed at 11 weeks.

We're having the baby tested to see if it was a chromosomal problem this time (none of the others have been) but for now I'm just feeling lost.

daisybell I'm so sorry to hear you have just had your fourth mc. I have also just had my 4th. All the more heartbreaking for you that things were looking so positive - you must be just devastated. I know others on here have been tested privately for uterine natural killer cells in coventry, which seems to be one direction to head in if the embryo's are chromosomally normal. They will be able to tell you more. For now I hope you recovering physically and getting plenty of support x

Hi cat I'm ok thanks, hope you find something nice to do with this rainy (here it is anyway) sunday.

Daisybell, so sorry to hear this. I had a very similar situation with my mmc, which was looking good at 9 weeks and then mmc was diagnosed at 13. It's a real shock. Mine was down to Turner Syndrome and getting the genetic diagnosis did help me come to terms with it; that one really was 'bad luck'. It's horrible, though. I hope you get some answers that give you peace. Look after yourself. xx

daisybell I'm so sorry to hear about your 4th mc, you poor girl. After getting to 11 weeks I know you must be so heartbroken

The upside is that you did get further this time than last and as they haven't found problems it gives us hope for your success in the future.

I hope you can take some rest these next few weeks and then find the strength to try again. Next time will be your happy ending!!!

Hugs to you xxxx

Daisy bell - it must be incredibly heartbreaking to get through the hurdle and for it not to work out. I hope you can get some answers from the chromosomonal testing. If it comes out clear, would you consider NK cell testing in Coventry? A lot of ladies have had success after being given the all clear at St Mary's.

I am in a similar situation - but unfortunately for me the NK treatment did not work out either. I am waiting for ERPC on Friday and then the results from genetics testing. In my case part of me hopes that it was a chromosomonal issue ie just a case of being unlucky. Otherwise it may be end of the road.,

Evening all - it's JBrd here, I have namechanged - long overdue, and after seeing How To Train Your Dragon 2 today, I decided to go for it

Daisy Feel free to unload here, we have all gone through it. I've also had my 4th mc a few months ago, and like you, it had been going strong and looking good, we thought we're out of the woods - but no. It's just soul destroying, a mc really takes it out of you. Did they say how long the tests will take? Hope that you will get some answers as to why it didn't work...

daisy so sorry you lost another baby! that's really shit, especially after getting so far. I hope the genetic testing brings clarity. If it was chromosomes, that's just awful luck, if not it may be worth speaking to Coventry about the NK testing, though being all ok until 9 weeks then having a MMC doesn't sound typical to me.

jbrd or should I say cloudjumper loving the new name!