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Miscarriage/pregnancy loss

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Original poster

Recurrent miscarriage support - tests, treatment, trying again - thread 8

998 replies

Bakingtins · 01/11/2013 07:35

Welcome everyone, pull up a chair! A thread for anyone who has suffered multiple miscarriages and is in need of company, information, moral support, tea or sympathy.

Can I suggest we start page 1 with a recap of where we are all up to, because my fuddled head can't keep track?

OP posts:
TinyTear · 16/12/2013 10:53

Also because my period tracker app is all crazy now as the dates for the MC messed the averages up

DownstairsMixUp · 16/12/2013 11:09

Tiny I don't plan on using them after my periods are in a regular pattern again, mainly because I can generally pin point it but I had an ERPC in September this year and have been using them to track cycle untill it settles down. One of my main reasons was purely to as after mcs I have super heavy periods for a while and was worried about being at work as I work on a shop floor so wanted to know when abouts it was going to happen to! I'm hoping this month is the sign they are going back to normal!

TinyTear · 16/12/2013 11:12

Good point about the shop floor, I worked in a bookshop for 18 months just over ten years ago and that would have been terrible.

Office based now and always keep a pack of pads in my locker to make sure i am not caught out...

My ERPC was on 30th October, so I will see how things settle...

Are you going to go for it this month, murderous feeling aside?

squizita · 16/12/2013 11:19

Downstairs that was me, but I'm just finishing off my AF (which after a 1 day vanishing came back with vigour) and am not due to OV test till Friday (cycle day 1 being Sunday/Monday overnight last week I'm on cycle day 7 and usually OV about day 12-14). :)

DownstairsMixUp · 16/12/2013 11:21

I keep a stash now in my locker, though it's upstairs our staff room, so it would be a quick dash! I always worry it will happen on one of the days we are short staffed arghh! Would be a disaster. We did it once yesterday to be fair, I did apologize for being a bit snappy Blush

Have you had a period since then? I lost track of the thread so haven't had time yet to go through the updates. Think I got my first one around 6 weeks after the erpc, was not painful but very heavy, was lucky i was at home at the time really but doing the ov sticks helps as I pretty much am bang on 14 days on after a positive ovulation test!

TinyTear · 16/12/2013 11:31

I did on the 3rd December, so not too bad (30th October ERPC to 3rd December)

We ditched the condoms now and will just take it easy and see where it goes...

DownstairsMixUp · 16/12/2013 11:43

It's the best thing really, this is the first time it's been regular, last period was around 27th of november and as i ovulated yesterday or got a pos opk the next one should be end of this month, if this is regular i want to ditch the OPK's and just go back to normal really. Wouldn't it be great for some of us to get a christmas bfp! :)

tannyLoo72 · 16/12/2013 12:12

Hi Downstairs I'm OVing at the moment, but it's only 12 days since my last MC started, so condoms and waiting for AF to show up right around Christmas (I hope). The wait is murder. Just want to get back to it, but know I really need to give my body a break, otherwise I would have happily joined you as a Christmas POAS buddy!

Tiny, I don't use OV tests either, but I get loads of EWCM and ov pain, and am ridiculously "up for it" when I OV, so it's pretty easy to tell...

First day back at work post MC, and I had only been back for a couple of weeks since my previous MC, so feeling very out of things. Keep daydreaming and am still very preoccupied with all of this. Back to boring work emails I guess...

DownstairsMixUp · 16/12/2013 12:45

Thanks for you Tanny on the brightside, at least you can have some guilt free xmas drinks? I was kinda like that after the mcs to, just wondered round the shop feeling a bit head in the clouds, really didn't want to be there. It isn't easy. I will be at the MIL's on xmas day so will be awkward if I do miraciously end up PG and can't drink, not getting my hopes up though tbh.

tannyLoo72 · 16/12/2013 13:04

Unfortunately/fortunately I'm teetotal! It means I never have the awkward questions about not drinking, and don't have to worry about "safe" drinking during 2ww etc, but on the downside I can't get ratted, which following a MC I really want to do. My DH is an alcoholic and so we don't drink. I have a tendency towards problem drinking too, so it's not all altruism on my part...

Anyhoo, probably too much of a share on the open forums of MN, but anyone who knows me, knows this too.

I have wondered about what other release valves there are. Sex helps, but obviously not all the time, and self harming with cheese is a particular favourite, but that sensation of numbing the emotions for a bit (without drink/drugs) is missing for me.

I think I need to go and have a mindless wander around the shops right now. I need to get some more Raspberry Leaf tea, so I have an excuse.

JBrd · 16/12/2013 13:06

Downstairs I can be your ov-partner Xmas Grin. Like you, I suddenly jumped from 'low' to 'peak' on the CBFM, confirmed then by a strong line on the OPK. I thought I had one or two more days at least, since I had only been getting 'low' readings. CD13 today, so I guess it's perfectly possibly that I am about to ovulate. Panicked slightly, so promptly jumped DH last night and will be dtd again tonight Xmas Grin.

Man, I cannot wait to ditch all the temping, charting, testing, my life is lived in 2-week intervals. For over a year now, getting thoroughly fed up. But I am a control freak, and the ov testing gives me at least some sense of control. I also think that it's down to this that I manage to get pg very quickly each time. Just wish there was a similar way to stay pg...

I booked a smear test for the 23rd and now realised that this will be right in the middle of my 2WW - will have to move it, I'm not going to have someone poking around my cervix while there is even the slightest chance I could be pg Xmas Confused

DownstairsMixUp · 16/12/2013 13:07

Well there is that, plus then you don't get all the questions in the first 12 weeks you are pg and don't want to tell anyone (I will not even be telling my own dad if it happens for me again till 12 weeks and I do like a drink, so it's difficult)

I do understand what you mean, I was guilty, quite a bit, of drinking after the last m/c, I had a drink every night that first week to "numb" the emotions a bit but slipped out of it, thankfully.

Tell you what really helps? The massive bag of Walkers roasted chicken thyme flavour crisps. They are designed for sharing but I have not taken this concept in. Grin

Original poster
Bakingtins · 16/12/2013 13:18

Chatty today, ladies! Good luck for those of you ov-ing, wouldn't it be lovely to have some Christmas and New Year BFPs. We've all had a crappy time in 2013 and there are much, much better things in store for us all in 2014. Xmas Grin

OP posts:
DownstairsMixUp · 16/12/2013 13:24

Jbrd i just missed your post! Are you going to test on Christmas day?? I just used the test day calculator on First responses website and it says Xmas day would be a good day to test. This is my third time oving since last m/c. Maybe third time lucky and the festiveness might send me some good luck! If not, let's both just have a drink on xmas day and try not to be too down Grin

bakingtins it would indeed, aside from our holiday in 2013 and ds just progressing well in general (which i am so proud and grateful of) it wasn't the best of years, let's hope 2014 has some improvements in store!

tannyLoo72 · 16/12/2013 14:00

Big bag of Chicken and Thyme crisps? I can see the appeal Grin

Will definitely be drinking a cup of raspberry leaf to a better 2014! Brew

squizita · 16/12/2013 16:55

just checked on 3 different OV calendars and Xmas eve is by green for 'go' day. I use OV sticks but as people mention I can kind of tell in a CM/side pain/nymphomania type way!! Xmas Blush

DownstairsMixUp · 16/12/2013 18:26

Do you think if we all just ask "Santa" for a BFP it might just work?!

Notgivingup1 · 16/12/2013 23:13

worry just wanted to say good luck for tomorrow. Hope you get some sleep tonight.
so much going on here ladies. Surely we are all due some happy BFPs. Think my peak time will be this weekend but I am trying to pretend that I am not thinking about it! I can feel the control freak coming out again.
Thanks for the info on Prof Quenby Baking. I think I need to give it some serious thought in the new year. DH wants us to try again with the heparin plan and think has lost faith in doctors but I am slowly dropping this other option in there. Just I know what you mean - I felt it was easier to understand with a reason and I could accept it. Totally with you on the ridiculous things you get told. Makes me Angry. Don't have the container!? I was completely fobbed off too on the NHS when I asked for testing so did the ERPC privately as luckily had insurance through work - somehow they covered it as part of the operation (didn't think they would)

Justonemoretime · 17/12/2013 06:44

Good luck today worry.

Feeling HIGHLY emotional and hormonal - I think my personality has been stolen and replaced with that of a total b*tch. Feel like I need to go for a run or have a good cry. I felt so tense last night I could hardly get to sleep. My inner voice has a vile potty mouth. I miss the old me.... 2 or 3 more days before I can reasonably poas. Hope I don't lose the plot before then.

Original poster
Bakingtins · 17/12/2013 07:17

worry good luck for your scan.

OP posts:
tannyLoo72 · 17/12/2013 08:04

Good luck Worry

JBrd · 17/12/2013 08:43

Good luck for today worry, will be thinking of you!

Downstairs - not sure I'll be testing on Christmas Day, I think it'll be too early for me... I'd rather not get a BFN and then having to re-test to make sure.
Think I will have a glass or two over Christmas regardless, I don't drink much, so not really an issue.

V. frustrated here - tried to dtd last night, and yes, the emphasis is on 'tried'. DH couldn't -ahem- 'rise to the occasion. FFS! Angry Plus, I'm all sore again and now worrying that I'm heading for another bout of cystitis. Just got over the last one, which needed antibiotics, really unpleasant.
DH didn't seem to think it's a big deal, whereas I just wanted to shout at him to man up and make his contribution to getting me knocked up. Feeling once more that everything is always left to me, and the one time he has to do something, it doesn't happen. Angry

Rant over, sorry.

DownstairsMixUp · 17/12/2013 09:09

Good luck today Worry

Jbrd I went to that First Response site and it said Xmas day was good to test but I'm thinking I shouldn't now as we are at the same stages? And totally agree I don't want to retest or have the BFN hanging over me on Xmas day and potentially make me feel a bit poo. Maybe I'll wait till we are home from the MIL's after xmas. Have you done it at all in your fertile window? When did you get the pos Ov? I got it day before yesterday retested yesterday and it had turned negative so I guess it has happened for me now.

butterfly86 · 17/12/2013 11:29

Morning everyone there's a lot going on here! Just wanted to say good luck to worry

Fingers crossed for everyone who is in the 2ww or due to ov :)

Waves to everyone else hope you are all doing ok?

11 weeks 2 days here next scan is friday.

Iworrymyselftosleep · 17/12/2013 14:39

Oh thank you for remembering! Im sitting in the waitingroom and I thought I'd see how you all were and youve remembered me! Im a little tearful now which means that no matter what I'm going to end up sobbing n snotty during my appointment. Ive sent dp and ds away cos I dont want ds to be there if its bad news - he was with me a year ago tomorrow and insisted on lying on the trolley next to me while I was being scanned. He told me we could have a little sleep together and held my hand.

Not read much so will read properly later.