Where have all the fit, interesting and available men gone? Part 22

[Monty100]

Yay, did I make it to the bar first again??

they havent mentioned anything here for sunday, aside from wanting to get dp something!

now who were those doubters who reckoned i was damaging my kids by rushing it with dp ?

aside from that i have been on the go all day it feels like

school and college run, trip to the dump, the yearly s.e.n review for ds2 at school, bank stuff, a trip to the council to pick up some forms, back to school to get ds1 and take him to the orthodontist to have braces fitted, then back to school afterwards to get ds2, plus a trip to sainsburys for petrol, ending with collecting dd1 from college

oh and i have to make moussaka yet

I haven't a clue when fathers' day is, it isn't something we celebrate
ex's family are big on sending cards like 'to a very special grandson' with nauseating 'poetry' inside but hopeless when it comes to playing a real role in the dc's life
for me sending a card to ex would be equally tokenistic, and I won't do it for that reason
when they are old enough they can make/get cards if they want. If they show signs I will push the junk modelling side of their creativity - another home for remodelled cereal packets would be handy

lou you make me feel tired just reading that!

lol me too!

the moussaka was lovely btw, i havent made it for years, but will definitely be adding that to my list of ones to do again

dp is back to work tomorrow, working 8 days straight so i wont be seeing much of him

ds1 is in bed feeling rubbish because of his braces, and i have already told the school i am keeping him off tomorrow so he can get used to them over the weekend

the problem is that his lower jaw hasnt developed properly and he has a large overbite, so much so that the orthodontist says he will need jaw surgery in a few years to correct it, so the braces he has been given for the next 10 months, although removable to eat and brush his teeth, are made in such a way that his lower jaw is pulled forward

they have large amounts of plastic at the sides and he has to kind of slot the top ones onto the bottom ones, which is hard work for his jaw, plus it is making it hard to speak properly

add to that the usual soreness at putting teeth under strain, and he is really v unhappy this evening

i have given him painkillers, but he says aside from trying to keep them in the correct position, the metal is rubbing on his gum

this is all supposed to ease off after a few days if he can wear them as much as possible, but i dont think he will sleep v well tonight, and i think it is best he gets used to speaking wearing it etc, so he feels better about everything on monday

i spoke to his teacher and he understood, and told him that ds was worried about being teased (though i think that is unlikely given the friends he has and how the school is with their ethos regarding how everyone treats each other), so have done all i can, but bless him it isnt nice, i do feel for him

oh and dd2 tried calling her dad this evening and guess what? all his phones were off again ffs

he doesnt even know ds had the braces fitted

ASBM- sorry to hear about DS1, its so hard when the people who are supposed to protect them are the ones to hurt them

asbm i know exactly what you mean, dd1 has been down that route

when i told dp exh had yet again turned his phones off, he got so cross for the kids, and said he'd really quite like to just knock him out (then added a rather apt description of him which i probably shouldnt repeat on here)

they dont deserve to be called fathers, they should be ashamed of themselves, unfortunately they wont ever realise that

and the ones who you just know would be fantastic dads often dont get the chance, like dp, who has been told he cant ever have kids

Evening all, bit late, but just checking in.

Lou - do you have bonjela or something that might numb ds' mouth? Poor mite.

i dont, i will get some tomorrow, good idea

i ended up letting him take the bottom one out to get to sleep, or else he would have been awake all night, and the top brace is the most important

Lou - I don't blame you. I would have too.

Pharmacist might even have a better idea wrt something stronger to numb his mouth as bonjela is for littlies.

Hope he's ok.

Hi everyone, Nearly the weekend thank god.

Lou, DD has a fixed brace and her mouth is usually sore when it's tightened, we use bonjela for this. Hope DS1 gets used to them soon. DD hates hers, her teeth have already straightened so hoping the treatment will be finished well before the 18 month average.

I've got a big night out tonight in work town with collegues, stopping over here. Also hoping to go for a night on the fells tomorrow with fwb, in this passion wagon camper van. So looking forward to all of that.

morning everyone

lou - fwiw i would have done same, hows he feeling today? and how are you - hope you're feeling better.

as for father's day, it crossed my mind but will ask dd if she wants to make something rather than shell out £2 on that person her father

Morning everyone

Lou - how's ds?

Eve - that sounds like a good weekend. (But what is fwb??).

Aurora - is library man in? Have you 'wafted' passed him??

Won't be doing anything for sperm donor on Sunday, I'll remind the dcs but that's about it.

I usually buy dp a little gift from them.

monty - it's friends with benefits
hahaha no he isn't today

how's you today, monty?

guess who's just turned up
ooh eck

and he's talking sat quite clse to the same girl i saw him hugging the other day oh bugger ho hum

i need tyo get a grip :/

right got to go ladies, speak soon

thanks everyone, he isnt too bad atm, thogh ds2 wasnt feeling good in the night so is off as well today, and i have had the most awful morning, been in floods of tears for most of it

poor dp has been calling every half hour to see how i am , i feel better now slightly but only just

i know it sounds cryptic, but i dont really want to go into the events of this morning online, it was v upsetting though, however it looks like i have found a half way solution so feel less stressed

Oh Lou, hope you are feeling better now you can see a way forward.

Aurora, get a grip woman.

Monty, my FWB is a long standing one, bit of a rolling stone and he pops in and out of my life depending which planet part of the world he is in. His camper vans are usually nice though, in between a motor home and a VW hippy van.

Lou - hope you're ok.

Aurora -

Eve - sounds like fun!

how's ds lou? I used to work for an ortho, the results can be amazing. If things don't settle give them a call, it does take a while to get used to having something like that in the mouth though
as for being teased it seemed to be a mark of cool among the teenagers we saw, they would vie with each other in choosing the loudest coloured elastics
i am at my wits end with dc school. small village school, mixed classes. He is the oldest in his year's intake. Just got class lists, and he has been put with dc two years younger for what i am told are 'emotional' reasons. Educationally he is sound, the handful of other children 'kept back' are slower developers much younger than him. I am gutted and mad in equal doses, particularly as I work there and no one had the courtesy to discuss the decision, although other parents were consulted. Sometimes it is a hard to be a lone p with no one but you to stick up for your dc. Even called ex, he agreed but I hate being on my own with this. I feel I have failed my ds by choosing a school that treats us like dirt, actually. Even if the decision is revised it has been published for everyone to see. Also my dd 4 was left alone crying at before school club when I had to take my exam and no one had the courtesty to apologise. Sorry for rant. what should I do?

Ninah - Pppf! The education system in this country will never cease to disgust amaze me. WTF? I'd have him out of there before two shakes of a lamb's tail!!!

How far is the nearest town? Are there reasonable schools there? Is it feasible to just move him??

Calmed down a bit! glad you agree though
I am so disappointed ds has failed to thrive and as I am on my own I feel solely responsible, so I get v het up about stuff like this
talked to my friend who is a ta and sometimes teaches him, she was surprised too but in a low key chilled kind of way
her dc attend school in the next village and seem v happy
the nearest 'town' type school is OK too, I visited a while ago as I have never been totally convinced about ours
the other alternative is to go private, which I am reluctant to do, a on principle and b because it will mean asking ex for more money - this school is half an hour away
I would do anything to feel ds was happy and fulfilled tbh
dd is fine atm, bright and resilient
it's a funny thing that the first person I turned to is ex

i feel down but ok thank you everyone

ds is not too bad but napping

exh finally sent a text to me this afternoon saying if dd still wanted to speak to him he now had his phones back on, i replied saying i thought he said he wouldnt do that again and he has replied with a big fat silence

dd2 said she didnt want to speak to him now was too late

what would the odds be that he would be unavailable again if she called now during the england match, even though they are playing shit?

Ninah - everything is about the dcs feeling happy and fulfilled. Does he know about being kept back? (Sorry if I missed that). It depends on how he would feel about it. My instinct is get him out of there. And I don't understand how they've made this decision without discussing it with you assholes.

As for ex being the first person you turn to, he's the father, that is completely natural. I often do it (usually to no avail). You should not have to pay for your child's education in this country!! Money should not speak education . OMG, that's prob not helpful, but yes, take him to a place that can educate him.

Lou - sorry you're down. .